Red vs Blue
by foodeatspeople
Summary: Did you ever have a problem with your roomate? They get on your nerves? Did you ever want to strangle the life out of them? No? Well maybe it's just them. Renji x Oc x Grimmjow will contain lemons later on and violence. So it's mature.
1. But why's the milk gone?

Hey! Decided it's about time I put an actual disclaimer on here about how I do not own any Bleach character just my own. And I realize I keep using the same name for just about all my bleach fics, regardless of them being connected or not and that's just because I'm WAY too lazy and humourously enough uncreative when it comes to names. So for reference the only stories of mine that are connected so far are Fragile and its sequel Truth under My Strings. This has no relation to those stories. Though I will be doing a Grimmjow oneshot and that will be connected to Fragile and T.U.M.S (haha still makes me giggle). So enjoy and please review if you like it!

Oh! And I also do not take credit for the title of this fic; I just thought Red vs Blue would be an appropriate title for this. =D

8.17.09

It was morning. The sun was just reaching its height, high up in the early sky. The birds had yet to begin their morning ritual, and all was still. Everything was perfect…

"What the FUCK is your problem?! HAH?!"

Or at least it would have been if not for one house in particular.

"I figured that was **obvious.**" He glared.

"_Oh_?"

"'Yeah…"

"You're **both **idiots." enters third party, sluggishly rubbing her eyes.

"Jeez! Why do you both have to be **SO** loud in the morning?"

In this house resided one human girl, a Shinigami and an Arrancar at the espada level. Proving that in Karakura town anything could happen.

And in most cases, did.

Walking into the living area where they stood facing off, she shook her head. "Seriously. You two are like bratty kids."

Both men turned to stare at her, as she opened the refrigerator and rummaged around. Having found the milk, she stood then "Wait…now that I think about it you guys are like decades older than I am. Huh." Shrugging she set a glass down and poured the carton only to find it empty, a few drops sprinkling out.

"GAH!" frustrated, she went to the door, and slipped on her shoes.

"Hey! Where are you going?" called the red haired one.

Already half way out the door she shot back "Well someone drank all the milk!"

Slamming the door behind her, the two men stared at one another.

Running outside, both men caught up to her already down the road. Hearing them rather than seeing "Took you long enough." Smile in place and eyes shut.

"Che" came from the blue haired espada.

A couple moments of silence passed.

"Wait. Where exactly are we going?"

"To get more milk, duh."

"Yah, but this isn't the way to the supermarket…" The Shinigami replied, confused.

"Of course not; I'm going to Orihime's." a puzzled look came about his face.

"What? I'm not about to go buy milk when I wasn't even the one who finished it." She said, quite obviously.

"Besides, Orihime will give me some. She's nice like that."

"Isn't that a little ru-""Here we are!" she said cutting short his lecture and banging quite hard on the front door to her home.

The door opened producing a slim yet busty girl with long orange locks. "Ah, hello Suzu-chan." Seeing the boys she greeted them likewise, though a little more hesitant with the arrancar.

"What brings you here?" she asked soft spoken, as was her nature.

"Ah, the idiots drank my milk again." She said, pointing to the idiots in question. "So I was thinking I could borrow some of yours. And by borrow I mean drink. Hehe."

"Ah, sorry, I just used up the last of mine."

"Aheah" Suzu grumbled, face souring.

"Well that's alright. I know one more place I can go."

"Sorry." She apologized again, bowing her head.

"It's fine. Come on, let's go."

"Ah, wait! I do have something." She said hurriedly running inside to get it. Coming back she had what looked like a once edible dish, only horribly mangled and oddly colored. No doubt something Orihime had made herself.

She handed it to Renji who appeared both surprised and embarrassed.

"It's just Inari-zushi with some onigiri and umeboshi." She said blushing a bit, though it wasn't entirely clear why.

"T-thanks." He replied a bit uncertain.

''Bye." She waved.

"Bye."

They walked on and no one said anything. Suzu was still preoccupied with getting her daily dose of calcium and didn't seemed too fazed with what just happened, while Renji stared down at the plates contents.

"You're not going to eat that are you?" queried the espada.

"I don't even know where to _begin_." He said, transfixed on the jumbled mess.

Coming to their hopefully last stop in the search for the dairy product in question, Suzu went to the door of the Kurosaki Clinic and knocked; meanwhile a near sadistic smile crept onto the panther's face.

There was an apparent commotion that could be heard through the door, smashing and crashes, then a ruffed up looking Kurosaki, striking orange hair and star t-shirt as compliments, emerged yelling over his shoulder "lousy father."

"What is it?" he questioned, scratching his head, then seeing who it was "oh Suzu, what's up? Why so early?"

"Hey, I wondered if I-""**Ichigo**!" Suddenly the teal haired panther was right in the boy's face, shoving Suzu to the side, wide set grin in place.

"AH! Grimmjow! What do you want!?"

Laughing viciously "You know what I want. Ain't it obvious? Let's fi-"

Suzu having regained footing returned the favor and pushed the unabashed Grimmjow out of the way.

"As I was **Saying**!" she quipped "I wanted to –ACK! No! Don't finish it!!"

Throwing herself passed Ichigo; she made it to the kitchen just as Ichigo's father was consuming what looked to be the remaining swig of milk in the container. Lowering it from his stubbly face he exclaimed "OH! Suzu-San! My other daughter has returned!!"

"Dad you say that about every one of Ni-san's friends who happen to be girls." Replied Karin, clearly not impressed by her father at the moment.

"That-that's not true!"

While they bickered, Suzu scrunched her face up, peeved beyond comprehending.

"Oh Suzu-san, what are you doing here?" Yuzu his other sister came into the kitchen, probably because of all the noise.

Grumpily "I just wanted some milk…and now it's gone."

"Oh! We have some." She said.

"Really!?"

"Yup! We always go through so much in our house that I have just started getting a couple so I don't have to go to the store every day."

So said she produced another jug to the delight of Suzu who happily downed her glass in five seconds flat.

"Ahhh, finally!"

After wiping her mouth and bowing to the goddess of dairy, she skipped off not noticing that the boys had been out for the whole milk debacle. Passing by them Renji was saying "Oh, so she went back today huh?"

"Yah, Rukia said she had something come up in the Soul Society but she would try to make it back before it got too late."

Renji looked a bit down but then Ichigo leaned in and patting his back said "I bet it's a surprise."

Smiling genuinely Renji laughed and said "Yah. She'll be back."

"Okay lovebirds" she jibed "I've accomplished my mission so I'm leaving with or without you."

Noting that Grimmjow was off sulking from not getting to fight she reassured him, patting him "Aww, its okay. Maybe next time."

"Che. Whatever" he said scowling.

Ichigo waved haphazardly and went back inside and Renji returned to their group as they headed back home.

Finally fulfilled her brain was no longer preoccupied with cow bi-products and suddenly a light switched on in Suzu's head.

"Oh my GOD! Renji it's your BIRTHDAY?!" she screamed.

It all came together; why Orihime gave him that concoction and he blushed and looked nervous. The thing about Rukia being gone today and why he was sad and then Ichigo cheering him up with 'I bet it's a surprise.' Maybe even why the milk was gone; It all made sense!

"Crap! It's already almost ten o'clock! We have to do something!"

"Quick! What's something you like to do?"

"Uh" clearly put on the spot.

"Hurry we don't have a lot of time."

Furrowing his brows "Well there is a new sunglass shop that opened …"

"That's perfect!"

"But I was waiting for Rukia to-""Come on!" she shouted, grabbing his hand and dragging him off, the espada following behind, though clearly not too thrilled.

With a little directing and a bit of walking, they reached their destined place; a shop known as Tinted Eyes.

"Ah, here we go!" she said. Really she had known about the place but had had no interest in checking it out. That and the name sounded a bit off to her.

Releasing the flushed and flustered Shinigami they went in and looked around. Really it was rather impressive. There were so many different styles and kinds of sunglasses, it was a little overwhelming.

While Renji seemed at home, walking each and every inch of the store, Suzu and Grimmjow hung back and goofed around; she would find a pair of what she found to be ill fashionable glasses and would try them on, laughing at how ridiculous they were. If she was lucky enough, she would manage to get a particularly hideous pair and put them on the espada, who would immediately rip them off, cursing and fussing. Soon enough a couple hours passed and Renji had managed to find a couple candidates.

After checking out they stood outside the shop and decided where to go next.

"Anywhere else you have in mind?"

"No, not particularly." He said rubbing his neck sheepishly, clearly not used to this kind of attention. Meanwhile Grimmjow stood hands shoved deeply in his pockets liking the situation even less.

"Well, I'm sure something will-"it was at that moment that Suzu's stomach gave a lurch and howled a sound thought to have come only from animals. "Come up" she finished blushing embarrassedly. Both boys snickering didn't help either.

"I guess we haven't eaten yet…"she said looking to the clock across the street, it read two fifteen; definitely past lunch time. Deciding they needed to eat the trio went to a favored restaurant. After learning Renji's favorite food, Suzu ordered three Taiyaki's, each with a different flavor. Renji preferred the one with red bean paste and helped himself, taking an enormous bite and relishing the taste, eyes closed in a world of bliss.

Smiling at the sight he made Suzu bit into hers, which happened to be chocolate filled. Her face lit up in mindless joy as she savored the sweetness.

Grimmjow last but certainly not to be outdone bit into his and unlike his companions a sour look became his features. Disgusted he spit it out, uncaring of their proximity to other life forms or the fact that they could only see his partially chewed taiyaki which seemed to appear out of thin air, he not being in a Gigai. Blatantly he cursed "What the hell is this shit?"

Grossed out by his display, but curious she took note of the pieces and figured it out. "Ah, you got custard!" she declared, receiving weird glances and whispering, as she apparently talked to herself; pointing at some gnawed on taiyaki on the ground, though if they knew her better they wouldn't think twice about her mental state of fairs.

After finishing their meals (Suzu offered to share hers with Grimmjow but the espada outright refused; he didn't trust it) they made their way through the rest of town.

Heading back home they took a more rural route as they passed streams and hillsides of green, when abruptly there was some arguing overheard and a stray ball headed back to earth though directly towards Suzu's group, narrowly missing them as it whizzed past.

Soon a pair of voices caught up to them. "You idiot!" one yelled, "What was that?! What were you thinking aiming _way_ over there!?" The boy, looking around twelve or so, ran up to their little group. Saying a mere "hey" in passing, he headed off in search of the fly-away ball.

Shortly after two more boys, roughly his age came up to Suzu and the others. They didn't say anything and just stood, uncomfortably staring. It was like they were eyeing Suzu and the others up, though it was uncertain if they could see Grimmjow or not.

Finally the yelling one came back; he seemed to be the lead boy or at least the only one capable of speech. "Well?" he scolded "What are you guys doing just standing there?! Come on, we have a…game to –finish." The tail end of his speech faltered a bit as he too looked where their eyes were glued. They were staring at someone, Suzu just couldn't tell who…and it was starting to weird her out a bit.

Before long she had to say something if only to get rid of the creepy feeling.

"Uh, hey…" she said uncertain, "Look; we're not mad about the whole ball thing, really. It just got away from you…So it's okay, you can stop stare-"

"Whoa, just look at him!" the talky boy burst.

"'Yah, he's BIG!" one replied.

"No doubt!" another said.

"Hey, do you think he'd be interested?"

Now though they had all stopped staring to gossip amongst one another, Suzu was more apprehensive than before. Who were they referring to? Could they _see_ Grimmjow? She glanced up to the espada worried. How would she explain him to the boys? Did she even want to?

She was so stuck in her own mind she didn't notice the group of boys had come to a decision.

"Hey!" the lead said, "Do you want to play? We could sure use another guy and you look like you'd be strong."

"Wait, who are you talking to?" asked the soul reaper.

"You!" they all shouted in enthusiasm.

"Huh?"

Suzu came back to her senses just in time to see the gang of youngsters drag the hapless Shinigami off. He looked back, silently asking for help, but Suzu just laughed. He looked so adorable when confused.

As they explained to Renji what his job was, Suzu watched with a smile on her face. It was cute to see his interactions with the kids. Really Suzu didn't know much about the red headed Shinigami, it wasn't until about a month ago that they all started living together so there was still so much to be learned, not just with him either. Each day seemed to be a new and exciting day.

Once the rules were sorted out, they began to play. Renji appeared to know what he was doing, but then again-

"Hey, you can't touch it unless you're the goalie!"

"Uh, right…sorry."

As they played, Suzu sat on the grassy hill; Grimmjow cursed, irritated by the whole thing, but later he too came and sat down.

They played well into sunset, the sky darkening rapidly.

"Pass it, Pass it!" the chatty one yelled.

Renji kicked it but just as before it flew way passed its intended mark and straight into Suzu hitting her dead on; a perfect face ball.

"OWW!!" she yelled. The ball fell, revealing a huge red mark over her face.

"HAH!" Grimmjow laughed. _Now _he was enjoying himself.

"Ah, sorry, sorry." Renji apologized, running to see the extent of the damage.

"Are you alright?" he asked.

"Jus' fin'" she responded a little wonky, the ball having smashed her nose inhibiting speech a bit.

"Sorry" he said again, though this time he couldn't hide a snicker.

"Ah, it's getting really dark" one of the boys said.

Yeah, it is. I guess we should stop."

"Oh! That's right!" the talkative one picked up his ball but continued "There was supposed to be a big meteor shower tonight!"

The others agree, nodding but excited.

"We better go, before it starts!"

They gathered their stuff and rushed off, but not before spouting how much fun they had and how great and cool Renji was.

A little embarrassed but obviously flattered, he waved as they became specks in the distance.

"Cum on, we gotta go" she said, still messed up.

Laughing he agreed and they headed back home. By the time they got back it was nightfall.

"We have to find a good spot to watch. I'm thinking maybe the roof-"

"Renji!" someone called out.

Turning to see, it was "Rukia!"

Sure enough it was the female soul reaper, the one in Suzu's opinion that Renji was enamored with.

"You made it back." He said, undoubtedly pleased.

"Yeah. Here" she said, handing him a piece of paper.

"Huh? What's this?"

"Just…open it." She replied. Standing under a streetlight he flipped it open, there were signatures of various people from Soul Society. Also a big Happy Birthday, Lieutenant Abarai was written in the center.

"How did you-"he began but stopped short.

"That's why I went back" she said. Smiling she watched him as he read the names.

Ikkaku, Hisagi, Yumichika, Ukitake, Rikichi, Yachiru and Kenpachi. But one name in particular stood out and made Renji's heart beat a bit irregular…

"Bya-Byakuya-dono?" he said.

"He heard what I was doing and added his name." she said, smiling even more. "I knew you'd like it."

"Rukia…thank you." Hugging her he looked so happy.

Suzu, who had been watching, turned away at that and looking up to the stars she couldn't help but feel a little jilted.

"She beat me" she whispered, just as a meteor streaked across the sky. Grimmjow meanwhile watched Suzu, an odd expression evident.


	2. The drip

9/12/09

Three weeks later

Suzu was sprawled out on the couch, munchies in arm's reach, vegging in front of the TV. She was watching the Disney channel (one of her more childlike obsessions) and it was pouring as it had been for a couple hours prior. She had no idea where the boys were, but at the moment she was too absorbed in American Dragon Jake Long to take note. Though she had seen every episode at l_east _a dozen times, it never failed to make her laugh.

Just as it was getting to her favorite part, the panther made himself known.

"Che. What the hell're you doing?"

Completely ignoring him, Suzu continued to munch, giggling here and there at all the right intervals.

"Hey!' he said irritated "What the HELL are you doing!?" he growled, annoyed.

Still he was ignored. Clenching his teeth he was about to launch himself over the couch and **make** her answer him when…

.Drip.

"What the, the fuck is this!?"

Show over and brain no longer taken "Hey, what's up?" _Now_ she paid attention to him.

"What is this!?"

Staring at him for a bit and then looking up, she realized the problem.

"Ah, the ceiling's leaking!" she said sounding rather pleased instead of worried about this new development.

"Cool" she said leaping off the couch and running to the now damp espada. Needless to say he was not pleased.

Standing about as close as she could get, she stared up in wonderment, just watching the spot as it went drip, drip, drip, drip.

It was at this moment that the absent Shinigami appeared, curiously watching Suzu as she stared at the ceiling while Grimmjow stood irritated near her.

"Hey" he said approaching them "What's-""There's a hole in the ceiling!" Suzu spurted.

"Ah…Isn't that bad?"

Still transfixed she didn't respond, though abruptly a huge smile came about her face and then just as quickly "Let's go!"

Met only with silence and a bewildered expression she took it a step further.

"Come on, come on!" she said in kiddy excitement, grabbing Renji and then Grimmjow's hand, trying futilely to drag the two who were far heavier than her.

Much like leading a horse to water, it didn't work, so giving up she ran to the door and was out before either men had any clue what she wanted.

Staring at the door "Uh…should we-?" "Che, I don't care what **you** do." Said the espada walking away, deciding it was better to follow the girl than be left with the retarded Shinigami.

After the panther slammed the door, Renji stood still staring but fist clenched.

For a second he had _almost_ forgotten who he was talking to but was quickly reminded with the espada's harsh reply. After a bit he realized it would be wise to keep an eye on the Sexta; after all it was his job, ordered by the soul society who equally did not trust the espada in the world of the living.

Resolved in his duty, he joined the two outside; one bathing in the rainfall, the other staying out of it as if it would ruin him. Suzu was jumping in puddles, barefoot but in bliss. Hearing the door she saw Renji and a huge smile lit her face.

"Renji, come out here and play with me!" she said. "Grimmjow doesn't want to, I don't think he likes the rain…" sounding saddened by this.

Glancing at the panther in question, he smirked a bit at this news. For someone seemingly dangerous enough for the soul society to take caution and yet he didn't want to get a little wet?

Grimmjow noticed his staring and stared straight back. "What the hell is your problem, _Shinigami_?"

"Nothing" he said, staring back to the dancing girl in the storm. "Just found it funny."

"Hah? And what's that?"

"It's true; cats don't like water." He said breaking out in a grin.

"What was that!? You got something to say!?" he yelled, turning to face him.

"I think I just did…" awkwardly staring at one another, neither backing down. Their reiatsu flaring, it was looking like a dangerous situation until someone broke the tension.

There was a hearty splash as Suzu jumped in a puddle meant to be a lake, getting them both and snapping them out of their riled stupor.

At least momentarily enough to gripe at her for getting them wet.

"What the Fuck!" cried Grimmjow. Apparently he really _didn't_ like the water. That or he didn't like being interrupted from a fight. Suzu figured it was the latter.

"What was that for?" Renji asked.

"Cause you're idiots." _And because you were ignoring me_ she added mentally.

Slipping passed them, she went for the door.

"Hey, where are you-""You two ruined my fun." She said glaring at them. "I'm going back inside."

Following her, they stopped just inside the doorway, where she pointed at their feet, signaling for them to take their sandals and socks off.

Grimmjow quickly stripped them, annoyed while Renji took a bit longer. Standing back up, he took one look at Suzu and his face heated up, a clear blush spreading.

The espada saw this and realized what it was he was staring at, a deep smirk plastered on his face.

"Hah, what's wrong Shinigami?" he began mocking. "Something you don't like?"

Renji sneered furrowing his brows as Grimmjow continued.

"Or is it something you _do_?"

Suzu who was standing between the two looked confused. "Huh? What are you talking about?"

"Oh, nothing. Just I think our little soul reaper is finally startin' to be a man."

Still confused "Renji what are—Oh!" she said.

Apparently it was never a good idea to go out in a storm in a thin t-shirt, because when you get back things begin to show; specifically her bra and two little bumps popping up despite the padding.

While Renji matched his hair, hand over his mouth in embarrassment, Grimmjow laughed as Suzu rolled her eyes at the still immature boys.

"Oh please." She said exasperated "Not like there's anything to see."Taking her shirt she lifted up over her head and then off as she turned her back to them, walking away.

This did little to help alleviate Renji's mortified face but the once sulky Sexta now seemed in a better mood.

Grinning cockily "Sure you don't wanna go after her?"He teased.

"Shut up."

Renji went off to sulk as the Sexta thought about the situation.

Maybe it wouldn't be so bad living here, if it meant he got to mess with the pineapple headed Shinigami. Also the close proximity to his rival, that boy Kurosaki made it all the better in the arrancar's mind. He could kill two birds with one cero, a pleasant thought indeed.

Satisfied he decided to go find the girl and see what she was doing. Who knows, could be fun.


	3. The pervert and the gentleman

Okay, i'm a little freaked cause this only took me two days to write...the last time that happened it wasn't very good. I'm hoping this is not the case here.

Anyway, do not own any character but Suzu and i do not own the song Take A Bow by Rhianna.

Enjoy!

10/1/09

Suzu was in her room, changing out of her soaked garments. A tune filled her head making her hum along with the melody only she heard. The rain continued to fall, drumming softly against her windows and a chill prickled her bared skin.

Silently she looked at herself in the mirror, standing only her underwear, a thoughtful look about her face. She thought about the boys and their reactions, though really Renji was the only actual reaction to her whereas Grimmjow was just making fun of him. Slowly she perused her body, mapping it out with her fingers, checking any flaws.

For the most part she was not unhappy about her appearance or wished she could change anything but still…

Her hands went up to her breasts, so small like apples. Realistically she had never wanted huge breasts; for one thing on her they would be un-proportionate and odd and she knew of the problems some women had placing a great deal of strain on their backs.

Even so…she thought back to the look on Renji's face.

She couldn't help but wonder if they were truly something to merit a response like that, or if maybe it was the Shinigami himself and his lack of experience in matters like that.

Sighing she was just about to turn around and finish dressing when she heard the door creak…

The espada went up the stairs and headed down the hall going to Suzu's room. He was bored now that the Shinigami scum was gone and figured he could pass the time another way.

However when he got there the door was mostly closed. He could hear humming and knew the girl was inside. Curious he peaked through the crack in the door and saw her undressing, a lewd grin crept at the corners of his mouth. As he continued to stare, he noticed her hands roaming her own body, and then stopping at her covered mounds.

He had no idea what it was she was doing or why her face shone with uncertainty, but at this point he didn't care so much. He really hadn't given it much thought before, but looking at her now he could not deny the pleasurable feeling building and with it the mounting desire to touch her.

Unfortunately for the Sexta, his leering nudged the door making it sound the alarm, notifying the girl of his peeping presence.

"Grimmjow!" she yelled, quickly covering herself. "What the hell! You pervert!"

Found out, he gave her a 'whatever' expression, hands shoved in his pockets and face turned away.

Finding this not acceptable "Do you Mind?" she said.

"Nope, not at all."

"Obviously." She said eyes narrowed sharply.

Quickly enough she threw on her tank top and cargo shorts and with a huff brushed passed the arrancar going back downstairs.

Finding the Shinigami gone she was a little confused and oddly uneasy. Though given what just happened with the panther, maybe it wasn't so strange. Remembering the leak in the ceiling and seeing the puddle that now stained the floor, she went into the kitchen to get a towel and a pan to put under the leak.

Watching it drip, making a rhythmical ping, ping sound her mind wander.

_Maybe he hid because of the bra incident_ she thought. I mean he couldn't exactly **leave** right? Not with the espada here. Surely he wouldn't just abandon his job _and her_ her mind added, just because of one teeny incident.

The more she deliberated the more she didn't know and the more she thought about it the more she wondered why she was even thinking about it at all.

_It's not like I __**like**__ him_ She thought. It was too early for that, hell they've only been there for about two months.

Shaking her head clear, she glanced to the clock only to realize one of her shows was about to be on.

"OH CRAP!"

Scrambling up, she lunged over the couch and found the remote quickly flipping it to her station. Glee her new favorite show started and she had almost missed it! Rapidly getting involved in it, she missed Renji's return. Curiously he stood behind the couch, quietly watching it and Suzu as she laughed or yelled at what was happening. By the time she realized he was there, it already half over.

"You can sit ya'know?"

"Oh. Uhh, right." A little embarrassed at being caught, even if he didn't do anything wrong. They sat silently through the commercials, neither saying anything.

At the last five minutes of the show, a cover of Take A Bow was played, and Suzu sang along with it, though not as high as the actress.

'_Talking 'bout girl I love you, you're the one._

_This just looks like a rerun,_

_Please, what else is on?_

_Don't tell me you're sorry 'cause you're not,_

_Baby, when I know you're only sorry you got caught._

_But you put on quite a show, really had me going._

_But now it's time to go, curtain's finally closing._

_That was quite a show, very entertaining._

_But it's over now._

_Go on and take a bow.'_

Renji was watching her out of the corner of his eye. He had no idea she could sing.

Grimmjow as well was sitting on the stairs, watching though they had yet to notice his presence. The Shinigami was preoccupied it seemed.

Soon enough the credits were rolling and the enchantment ended.

"Haa that was a good episode!" she said, smiling. "Hmm, I wonder what's on now."

She ended up watching a show called Eastwick which she ended up loving, adding it to the list of things for her to watch.

Flipping through the channels, she wasn't finding much. Suddenly her eyes became droopy and sleep pulled at her. The light drizzly sounds still present outside didn't help matters and soon Suzu was slumping over her head bumping Renji's shoulder. Noticing this, he shifted her so she rested on the arm of the sofa. Getting up he went to her room and retrieved a blanket, draping it over the sleeping girl.

Grimmjow watched with a hint of agitation, his eyes narrowing.

_Che _he thought. _Fucking soul reapers_. He headed back to his room, suddenly very pissed.


	4. The knuckle debate

Well this was originally going to be longer, but i figure the rest of this can probably stand as its own chapter. I have roughly 4 or 5 chapters planned out passed this so i should be able to write them easily enough. After that i have plenty of other ideas, it's just a matter of where to fit them in the story.

I do not own any Bleach characters nor do i take claim to this title i got from a chapter of the manga.

Please enjoy and review! I love having feedback!

10/4/09

Two weeks later

"Is that all ya got?" staring at his fallen foe, he watched him get up, a smile turning up his mouth.

"Nng…No" he said recovering.

"I'm not done yet!"

Watching him from hooded eyes, a genuine toothy grin appeared.

"Good! Then stand up and fight!" he yelled, clearly enjoying this in some form.

Meanwhile on the stairs that led to Urahara's shop, Suzu and Grimmjow viewed the battling pair, one with a dreamy look, the other annoyance.

Renji and the large boy Chad had been at this for a while now, though it didn't seem like either one were getting tired.

In truth they were more pumped than normal; a fact that though Suzu could not relate she certainly admired.

Grimmjow on the other hand was more pissed than usual.

Ever since Chad came by to ask for Renji's help in training, the panther was more restless and very easily agitated, even for him. She didn't know why but she did not want to risk asking him.

After a while, they decided they had trained enough. Chad thanked the Shinigami for his help and then left.

Renji appeared a little sweaty but no more worse for wear. As he approached Suzu commented.

"That was a nice thing you did for him."

"Yah, well I figure if he wants to get stronger then why not." He said wiping his forehead. "Plus it doesn't hurt to train a bit myself."

"Train huh?" Grimmjow who had been silent this entire time spoke, a chill to his voice.

"Hah! It would take you a thousand years to get nearly as strong as me!" as he said this his reiatsu flared.

"What was that?" now the two stood facing off, Suzu to the side of them, a worried expression in place.

"Come on, _Shinigami_, unless you're too tired now."

Gritting his teeth "As if… Fine. Let's go!"

"Wait you guys" she began, but to avail; both men flew off further into the training grounds, leaving her in the proverbial dust. If not for their reiatsu, she would have lost them completely.

Their combined spiritual pressure was stifling! Even at a distance it was palpable.

Heading in that direction, she heard the sounds of the battle commencing and just hoped that neither one killed the other.

As she tracked them, she thought about Grimmjow and his odder behavior. Before she hadn't given it much thought but now…maybe it was because of Renji.

They had never gotten along, so fighting wasn't different but for some reason this time it felt more serious.

By the time she reached them, the signs of combat were evident. The battle grounds were torn and upturned and the fighters themselves were bruised and bleeding. Renji's Zabimaru was unleashed and the panther had his sword unsheathed, but thankfully not released.

She couldn't tell which one had the upper hand, as they were equally panting and sweaty, dried blood streaked down their bodies and forehead.

Just when she was beginning to think they had worn themselves out, the Sexta grew serious and took hold of his sword, like he was scraping it. Before he could call out its name however, the girl launched herself blindly at him taking him down with a force she didn't know she was capable of.

He cursed at being taken off guard as they rolled harshly, with Suzu landing painfully hitting her head against an untouched rock face. Slumped down, she didn't open her eyes immediately.

Renji sheathed his Zanpakuto and ran to see if she was okay, while Grimmjow dusted himself off.

"Hey!" he yelled "Where are you going? This isn't over."

Renji simply glared, knelt at her side, as she sluggishly came to. "Suzu."

Hearing her name she opened her eyes, met with the concerned stare of the Shinigami.

"Okay, so future reference, _that's_ a bad idea." sounding sarcastic. Sitting up, her head swam and ached where she had banged it.

"Oww." Rubbing her right temple, a stinging sensation followed. Looking at her hand revealed a bloody smudge, startling her.

Renji saw this as well. "Are you alright? You're bleeding."

"Yeah." She said standing with the support of the brutal rock. "It's fine; just don't do this again."

Staring at one then the other "I'm not keen on another concussion."

Renji stood, watching her as she stumbled off. "I'm going to go sit. Sitting is good."

Before she left completely she turned back to them. "Remember." She glared, and then went to find a solid setting.

Realizing he was banged up pretty good too, the soul reaper decided a bath in the hot springs would be just right.

"Hey!" he said "There's a hot spring down here somewhere. It can heal injuries…if ya want." Quickly he regretted his decision when he saw the hateful look on the espada's face.

"Che, like I need that shit."

Giving up, the red head walked away. Still pissed Grimmjow was fully intent on leaving but a curse called curiosity pulled at him, so he went in the direction of the Shinigami.

Finding it quickly but not liking what he found, a scowl formed on his face at seeing the Shinigami shirtless already in the hot spring. He seemed content, enjoying himself which only further insulted the panther.

Glowering at him, Grimmjow walked over to stand next to the spring, the steam invitingly rising to greet him.

"Oh, you came." He acknowledged the Sexta, as he stood and glared.

"There's still plenty of room." He said after a beat.

"Fuck that, I'm not getting in there with **you**."

An awkward silence descended. The only warmth that could be detected was the temperature of the water. It was obvious the animosity still persisted.

"I won." Declared the espada abruptly, destroying their perfectly good quiet loathing of one another.

"Ha! As I recall you were beaten by the ground." Renji said haughtily.

"Bullshit! **I** fucking won, I had the upper hand."

"I didn't know that was what losing was being called nowadays…"

"Fucking Shinigami! You wanna go again?!" he said bending down so he was level with the red head.

"I don't fight weaklings." He said staring at the enraged arrancar.

Gritting his teeth, he looked like he was about to jump in there and continue where they left off but for one reason or the other he didn't. He huffed and stood back up straight. Another silence fell around the pair. Grimmjow closed his eyes, annoyance evident in his expression.

Moments later a tidal wave of hot water assailed the unawares espada, as Renji in an impulsively mean streak splashed him, hitting his front and the top of his head.

It was as if lightning struck him. Jumping he bellowed a choice word, shaking himself off and then locking a heated gaze on his assailant who at the moment was trying horribly to cover a chuckle at the arrancar's expense.

Still inexplicably unable to attack him, Grimmjow stalked off madder than ever.

Renji watched him go, grinning like a fool. _He really doesn't like water_. He thought and then chuckled.


	5. Heartbreaker

Welp here's the next chapter, kinda short-ish but ah well. i think it's good but again i wrote it, so what the hell do i know. hehe

Anyway, same old speal about not owning the characters and such.

Oh and in case you're interested this title comes from a song by MSTRKRFT called Heartbreaker. i was listening to it as i wrote this and it fits pretty well. Also oddly enough the most recent episode of Glee kinda works too (if you watch it, you may understand).

As always enjoy!

10/7/09

Suzu was sitting by the stairs, still recouping from her dumbass plan. Seriously, what part of her thought that it was a good idea to tackle a linebacker like Grimmjow was built? On the plus side her dizziness and headache were gone and it sounded as if they had listened to her about not fighting. So that was good.

About then a furious reiatsu appeared and with it a drenched and equally furious Grimmjow. His hands were in their normal place right in his pockets and based on the posture and the way he stalked over to her, she would have known just by looking how pissed he was.

"Grimmjow, why are you—"pausing she looked at him and noticed a difference; his injuries were all healed, including his once prominent scar. Staring at his defined abs a blush rose to her cheeks.

Her slack jawed expression served only in further antagonizing the arrancar.

"Well?" he began. "Finish your goddamn sentence!"

"What? Oh!" tearing her eyes away from his muscles she tried to explain to him.

"Uh, well…your injuries…they healed."

"So?" obviously he didn't understand.

"Umm, it's your scar…it's –gone."

"What the fuck do you mean, it's still-"Looking at himself he found the girl was right, much to his dismay and outright anger.

"WHAT!?" he screamed. "That fucker! I'm going to kill HIM!"

"I dunno, it's not _that_ bad-"she tried to reassure.

He gave her a look that said otherwise, so she went on. "I mean, **I** like it." She admitted.

After that however she was unable to look him in the eye strangely.

"Well, I'm feeling better so I'm going back inside-err above ground? Anyway…" standing up she climbed the stairs and disappeared quickly.

The Sexta had an odd look on his face though it became a cocky grin easily. She liked his chest did she? This knowledge almost made up for the fact that he didn't get to beat the Shinigami scum senseless.

_Next time_ he thought, his grin turning sadistic.

After getting her head checked (though probably not the way it needed the most) she got some much needed food, while watching Jinta and Ururu bicker.

Mr. Urahara indulged her with stories of Ichigo in his earlier years and some of things he along with Renji and a few others succeeded in accomplishing. Some of it was truly amazing when she thought about it and he wasn't even a genuine soul reaper!

Some time shortly followed she must have fallen asleep. She was in a separate room and could vaguely hear talking outside and it sounded like Renji.

Getting up more quickly than need be, she slid the screen door open yelling "Renji" but there was an echo. Coming around the corner she soon found why. Rukia was there and from the looks of it they were happily chatting away. Quickly hiding, she watched them interact.

She couldn't tell what they were discussing, mostly it looked like just light teasing and inner jokes between them. Though she did note how happy they seemed and the pink tint to Renji's face at her soft touch of his arm.

Pulling her head back Suzu put her back against the wall, her head falling back with a thunk. Slowly she slid to the floor as her mind drifted.

She knew that they were friends. She had known this before Mr. Urahara's stories. She even knew from Ichigo that they had grown up together, apparently in one of the worst places in the soul society.

Still…

Her heart throbbed woefully, clenching.

She could understand them being close, given what they had been through and she could certainly understand why Renji would like her. She liked Rukia too. But for some reason it hurt to see them like that; maybe too much…

Wrapping her arms around her legs she rested her head on her knees. Suddenly she didn't feel so great anymore. Her eyes began to tear up, flooding her vision.

Unaware of all else around her, she didn't notice the panther approaching.

He stared for a bit then "Hey!" Not receiving a response, he narrowed his eyes slightly. His attention was soon drawn to the pair in the hallway, glaring at the Shinigami and the woman he had put his arm through on a separate occasion.

Turning his attention back to the girl he tried again "Hey woman! Wake the hell up!"

Jerking a bit as if startled, she lifted her head. Visible tracks of water lined her cheeks and her eyes were rimmed red.

"What Grimmjow?" she asked pulling herself up.

"I'm going outside." She said walking passed him, waiting till she was further away to wipe at her eyes.

He watched her leave, confusion clear. Focusing back on the Shinigami pair he glared hatefully before deciding he had enough.

Leaving them, he went to join the girl outside.

Suzu was leaning against the shop's wall, when Grimmjow came out. He didn't say anything to her, but glanced in her direction then stood off to the other side of the door. It was a few minutes before the red head emerged, looking refreshed.

Seeing them waiting "Ah, thanks." He said. When neither responded he continued, "Well we can go now."

Not saying anything, Suzu pushed herself from the wall and started walking off. Renji was about to follow suit when the Sexta decided that his fist and the Shinigami's face needed to get acquainted. With a loud smack, Suzu turned around and Renji stumbled backwards, shock clearly registered before anger took hold.

"What the hell!?" he roared, gripping his face.

Glaring coldly at him, "That's for my fucking scar." He said. Briefly his eyes landed on the girl, before resuming his venomous stare.

Then just like that, he walked away, leaving the two behind.

Staring after him a bit, Suzu turned back to the bruised, sulky soul reaper, asking him "Are you-alright?"

Obviously angry "Yeah." Was all he said, before lowering his hand and walking away.

Staring at his retreating form, she had no idea what the hell just happened. But for some reason she got the sense that it was more than just because of a stupid scar.

Hooding her eyes she thought about it but quickly found no reason. Taking a deep breath in, she held it so it made her cheeks puffed and chubby, her back ramrod straight, before releasing it and following after her idiotic boys.


	6. Black and White

This one took a bit. I blame writer's block (not much but some), lack of motivation and being sick for the past 4 days or so. Seriously, this chapter did NOT want to be written. Nevertheless here it is. I'm not sure if i like it entirely, it could be better..but alas, i don't feel like messing with it.

The title for this i had in mind before, but then looking through Bleach manga titles i discovered(or re-discovered) that it was a title. soo just in case I do not take credit for this or Renji and Grimmjow as much as it pains me..

10/10/09

Three months have passed since the Sexta's scar mishap and in that time Suzu would like to believe that things have settled down. Of course wanting to believe it and it actually being the reality were two entirely different concepts.

In truth Renji and Grimmjow bickered and almost came to blows quite often now it seemed. Fortunately Suzu could get the two calmed down, most days in any event.

As for her, she spent those three months trying to convince herself that nothing would ever happen with her and the constantly clueless Shinigami, an endeavor she still struggled with even now.

Currently the trio was taking a nice, peaceful stroll, minus the outbursts of profanity and the occasional punches thrown. Suzu learned to walk in-between the morons to help prevent fighting, but due to her height (a meager 5'1") it did little to fully stop them.

Finding a lovely hillside, they sat and watched as the sun shrank in the distance. Though she was sure it meant nothing to them, if even they were paying attention, something about the sun fading only to be reborn the next day was reassuring. Even though you couldn't see it anymore, it was still there, just maybe further away than it had been before.

Something about that touched home and gave her hope. Taking a deep breath in and then letting it out, she felt much better and more relaxed.

A movement in her peripheral vision caught her attention as she turned her head to her right, catching sight of what looked like a white shadow. As it got closer the shape became more defined looking more like a dog, running at full speed, but after what was the question.

Soon Suzu could clearly see the dog and its apparent victim in the form of a black cat; though really it looked like more fun than anything serious. The cat from time to time would twist around and bat at the dog before rushing off ahead of it.

She smiled watching them play, twisting herself as they passed by her. Stopping in the middle of the road, the dog cornered the cat and was just about to get a good, slobbery lick in when tragedy came in the shape of a car, blindingly descending on the pair.

Without thought Suzu seeing the inevitable threw herself in the line of fire, shielding the immobilized critters, leaving herself wide open for the blow, closing her eyes for impact… but it never came.

For at the same idiotic instance that she launched herself into action, the boys did as well, Grimmjow getting there before Renji, the panther becoming the barricade needed to stop the car albeit violently, leaving a huge indentation of the espada's body in its wake.

Looking down at the girl who looked up at him, he scoffed, a look like _you dumbass_ on his face and scooped her up, with the cat in her arms. Renji took the dog, which was curiously standing there, wagging its tail like nothing had happened and they all vanished before the driver could get out and wonder at the strange damage done to his car.

Journeying a much safer distance from the would be crime scene, they stopped.

"You dumbass!" was the first thing out of the Sexta's mouth. "What the fuck were you doing?!"

For once, Renji seemed to agree. "What were you doing Suzu? You know how reckless that was?"

Ignoring them, Suzu was too preoccupied with the seemingly lifeless cat, as she kneeled by its side, trying to wake it up.

She didn't think it was hit; she was **sure** she got there in time, so why wasn't it moving?

"Come on kitty, please wake up." She pleaded, lightly stroking its fur. "Please don't be dead."

As she squat beside it, the dog remained neutral, sitting and panting, oblivious. Grimmjow was indifferent, not really caring if it lived, while Renji watched unsure what to do.

A couple minutes went by and nothing changed. It lay there, unmoving. Lowering her head, Suzu could feel the tears coming, her lip beginning to quiver. Her hand still rested on it as her shoulders began to shake with her tears.

"Don't…go…"she said in a sob.

Abruptly her hand vibrated, a purr could be felt. Opening her eyes, her breath hitching she looked into its eyes as it stared at her. It gave a mew then picked itself up and rubbed against the teary eyed girl who happily clutched it to her chest. The dog now interested walked over to give a wet, sloppy kiss first to the cat, then to Suzu, tail wagging as it went.

Laughing, she avoided the literal tongue lashing just enough so as to not receive a doggie French kiss. Twisting she called to the guys, trying to reaffirm the miracle just witnessed.

"Look!" she said holding out the kitty "It lives!" she said enthused.

Renji eyed her and then the cat. "Uh, yeah…" he said slowly.

"Whoop-de fuckin' do" replied Grimmjow, clearly not as excited as she. "Can we go now?"

"It is getting dark." The Shinigami said, noting the lack of light.

"Right…" her euphoria dying quickly, she put the cat down, giving it one last gentle stroke as it affectionately rubbed her leg. Patting the dog's head she stood up.

"Take care of yourselves." She said, trying not to cry.

"Stay out of the street!"

Sighing "Well play nice, okay?" waving she joined up with the pair and walked away. After a couple feet it became apparent they were being tailed. Stopping they turned and sure enough the fury duo were right behind.

"Aww" Suzu cooed. Bending down to their level she petted them, one panting the other purring. Even in the dark they both looked so damn adorable!

Leaning in close "Would you like to come home with me?"

They wagged and purred happily but her other companions weren't as keen.

"Hell no!" said Grimmjow "Leave them here."

"But Grimmjow!" she whined "Look at it! Isn't it cute?" shoving the cat quite literally in his face, the panther balked at the fury abomination, sneering.

"No. Get it away from me."

Pouting she tried her luck on the soul reaper. Giving her best doe eyed expression she cuddled the cat close to her. "Kitty" she said elongating the word, going for the cute factor, like it was something she had done before.

Though creeped out by the way she said it, he didn't get what she was doing. "What about it?" he said.

"Seriously?" she said then gave an exasperated sigh. She had forgotten the red head's propensity for being dense.

"Well whatever, I'm keeping them."

"The hell you are!" Grimmjow said. Renji likewise seemed skeptical.

"Is that a good idea?"

Glaring "Why not? I love animals and these guys are too cute to pass up!" she petted the dog's head with the hand not occupied by cat as it licked her.

When Grimmjow was going to complain some more she broke through his argument. "Besides it's MY house you're currently residing in and I can do what I want with it."

She walked past the boys, Grimmjow gritting his teeth. "If I want animals living there then it's my decision." _After all_ she thought _I have you boys staying there; it's essentially the same thing._

"C'mon. Let's go to the store and get food for these guys before it closes."

Making it home, more annoyed but successful in their mini trip the newly acquired roomies settled in, investigating everything, leaving nothing unscented or not covered in fur. After a thorough sweep the animals began settling down.

The dog circled in typical fashion before laying down on a recently purchased doggy mattress while the cat got a little too friendly for the panther, swiping his body across his pant leg. Suzu found the scene cute but the espada only became that much more incensed leaving while restraining himself from giving the beast a good punt.

"Aww, poor kitty. Rejected by your own." she said picking it up. She thought she heard a rude comment from the Sexta but giggled nonetheless. "Now what to call you."

She had figured out they both were male based on their territory marking on the way home. She sat down with it as it lay in her lap, just staring at her. It was odd; his eyes reminded her of Renji, an orangey hue about as close to brown as being a cat would allow. However its attitude at times were more like the Sexta; add to that its black coat like a little panther and it was hard to doubt the resemblance.

However as much as the case may be she figured the arrancar would be none too happy about it being named after him, so that option was out. So instead she thought of something more fitting.

"Kuroh." She said, to which the cat's eyes that had been lagging a bit refocused, a sure sign that he at least heard her. Seeing a twitch out of the corner of her eye she watched as the dog kicked a little in his sleep. His pure white fur was so soft and fluffy, she itched to touch it.

"Hmm, what should I name you?" as she thought she stroked his side, combing her fingers through his puffy hair. Unlike his companion, nothing clever surfaced in her mind. The only thing she could think of was how almost blindingly white he was.

"Shiro" she tested the sound on her lips; it wasn't bad if maybe a little less creative. It at least had a ring to it when paired with his opposite black feline. Where the cat's eyes made her think of the Shinigami the dog's were all Grimmjow. Bright blue and beautiful, they made a lovely package popping out from the blanket of white.

He had a better disposition too; playful like a puppy should be, energy abound. Maybe not the brightest but again she chalked that up to his youth. Scratching him behind the ears she heard someone approach, seeing the Shinigami.

"Quite popular huh?" he said noticing the sleeping cat sprawled out on top of her.

"Oh. Yeah I guess so."

He came over and knelt down; watching the dog as it still ran through its dream. Suzu was petting the cat, a smile on her face. Something like adoration came through that smile, making Renji wonder.

"Why did you take them in?" he asked. Actually he had been curious before but never voiced it.

Meeting his eyes she responded in truth. "Well like I said before I love animals. In fact I used to have a dog before, back when my mom was alive."

"Oh?"

"Yeah, she was the best. We found her too." Watching the cat as its chest rose and fell, she had a look of remembrance. "I think strays are the best."

Renji perked at this, genuinely piqued now. "Why do you say that?"

"Because" she began "They are just so much more." She said. Trying to find the words her expression changed slightly concentrating.

"They are grateful—for what they have, for what they are given."

"Like with our dog. She was so- protective of us. Apart from my mom and I if anyone came near us she was right there, making sure we were safe…it's like she was repaying us for finding her."

"She didn't have anything before, as far as we knew, no one owned her before we had her. So I like to believe we gave her a purpose, a place to belong."

Renji sat silently lost in his own past. What she said really meant something for him.

"Strays are the best because they give everything they have, once they find that someone they can protect. I mean I guess most dogs are like that, but still. Being rescued and loved, knowing you are no longer alone in the world…they have to be thankful for that, right?"

Taken out of his reverie he stared at the girl who realizing it or not shared the same view. He didn't think she knew that much about his past and yet she spoke as if she understood him.

Smiling "It's nice not to be alone." She said. Standing up, she put the kitty down near the dog, giving them each a nice pat.

"Well, I should try and sleep. Its kinda been a long day somehow."

"Goodnight Renji" she said and disappeared up the stairs leaving him to his thoughts.

He had always seen himself as a stray, not quite belonging, striving to be stronger. Since growing up in the Rukongai he had struggled just to survive, stealing to eat like the others. Then Rukia came and he felt a deeper sense of belonging. Yet even then his life was not easy.

Even after getting into the Shinigami academy and getting into top ranked classes he still needed improvement in certain areas; his kido was nowhere near good enough. Then he let Rukia go, selfless but painful. Surpassing Byakuya became his goal, one he still hadn't reached even now.

It seemed he was always trying to be better; stronger, faster. When he met Ichigo he had another reason for improving, he had a rival. And though having their share of ups and downs and plenty of fights he found he was someone he could trust.

Now with Suzu there was another person whom he felt understood him, a great deal it seemed. The stray was no longer alone.

Standing he gazed at the creatures in repose and smiled softly. Heading to bed he had to agree with her; it was nice not to be alone.


	7. It's the great pumpkin! Or not

This chapter was meant to have been up sooner, in fact when i started i thought 'oh well, i can do this in two days' HA! yah that didn't happen...Nevertheless i feel pretty awesome 'cause i just wrote two whole freakin pages tonight/this morning to get this done. I don't know if it makes sense or its all that great, but damnit all its Done!

Now onto the belatedness that is this chapter!

10/29/09

A few weeks later Suzu was on her laptop surfing the web and generally goofing off. Between YouTube, online games and TV shows she was managing just fine then something got her attention…It was Halloween! Though not a holiday that Japan celebrated Suzu had always thought it would be kinda fun, she just never got around to doing it before, namely 'cause she always forgot. But this time would be different!

Excited she got up and started doing her happiness dance, similar to her random dance or sometimes when she was bored she did a little jig. She hopped up and down a bit, and then started doing her usual finger dance while swigging her hips back and forth.

Kuroh and Shiro watched her silently, cocking their heads quizzically to the side. Just as she was into her coup de grace which involved the cabbage patch in poor syncopation a grumbling could be heard from the stairs; the boys were up. Renji descended them first, stopping short when he saw Suzu still in mid jig. Grimmjow still sleepily scratching his head, seeing the soul reaper grumped "Get out of the way!"

"You hear me Shinigami—"slowing to a halt, he too stared at the oblivious girl, not quite sure _what_ he was seeing.

He didn't know whether to make fun of her or be turned on slightly. Finally seeing her somewhat captive audience, she stopped abruptly blushing mildly. _How long had they been there_?

"Hi guys! I was…uh-"looking for an excuse but finding none "dancing horribly…but anyways, it's HALLOWEEN!" she said gleefully.

They stared at her like she was still fumbling…err what she calls dancing.

"Aww, c'mon! You HAVE to know what Halloween is!"

"Hall-oh-ween?" Renji tested the name, clearly not used to it. Grimmjow remained as he was, staring at the girl before him.

Sighing, "Halloween is like the best day of the whole year! Just it's not really celebrated much here…Nevertheless!"

"Okay, what is it?" the red head inquired.

"Well from what I've read you dress up in costumes and go to people's houses and they give you candy, for Free!" she said the last part emphasized.

"Che, that's retarded." scoffed the Sexta.

"What! Why?"

"Because, it is."

Glaring at him, "Well I don't care. **I **still like it."

"Now, all I need is a costume. But what to be…" Since this would be her first Halloween she didn't really have any clue where to begin in things like this. However, she had always seen herself as a creative individual so a costume shouldn't be too hard to find, even last minute.

While she thought the boys dispersed. Grimmjow took the sofa, reclining while Renji got some food. Watching him ransack the fridge, her mind wandered.

_Maybe I should be Rukia for Halloween…_ her eyes un-focused; she didn't know when Renji came to stand in front of her, sandwich in mouth. Taking a bite "Hey, you alright?"

"Huh? Oh yah, fine." Totally not fine. _Who am I kidding…that won't work._

"Any ideas?" giving him a puzzled look, he corrected. "For your costume I mean."

"Oh, well not really." She stared at the Shinigami, taking note of his soul reaper robes. "Though I suppose I could be a soul reaper like you, if I wanted…"

Jumping up from the couch, "The fuck you will!" cried Grimmjow, clearly taking offence.

"Oh?" Renji began. "What's wrong with her being a soul reaper?"

Stalking over "What do you **think**?" staring at him eye level "She'd be like you."

"Is that right? Better than being _you_." He sneered.

"Ha! She'd be lucky to be me!" he boasted haughtily.

"So does that mean I can be an arrancar like you?" she asked innocently.

Suddenly caught off guard, "What? I didn't fucking say that." Staring at her from his peripherals then resuming his glare on the Shinigami.

"Well then what can I—"watching as they stared each other down, almost quite literally butting heads as they were millimeters apart, reminded her of someone else. It also gave her an idea.

Heading to the door she slipped into her shoes, fully intent on leaving but a voice called to her.

"What are you doing?" the Sexta said.

"I know what to do now! Come on, I have an idea."

Reaching the Kurosaki clinic in no time, the boys stood confused as she knocked.

"Why the fuck are we here?" Grimmjow griped.

Knitting her eyebrows "You didn't complain the last time we were here, in fact I distinctly remember a certain someone shoving _me_ outta the way so he could fight a certain strawberry boy. Now who might that have been…"

"Shaddap…" Suffice it to say that the substitute Shinigami was not the one he wanted to pummel at this moment.

"Why _are_ we here?" asked Renji.

"I told you…I have an idea." She replied smiling coyly.

The door opened revealing what she hoped was Ichigo's father dressed horribly as what she could only assume was a ghost pirate, wooden peg leg and sheet included. How that worked was a mystery but somehow he pulled it off. Lifting his eye-patch, seeing who it was, he exclaimed "MY daughter! You have returned!"

"Uh, yeah…sure have." She said uncertain. "Anyway, I wanted to talk to Ichigo—"

"What are you doing?" said Ichigo shoving his father out of the doorway.

"Ichigo! She came back! Suzu, she—"

Punching his idiot father "Stop being so weird. Geez." Seeing the three standing there he motioned "Come on."

Passing by his sisters who were carving scary faces into their respective pumpkins they headed to his room so they could talk in private.

Sitting in his swivel chair "So what did you want?"

Suzu had plopped on his bed, while the boys stood neither seemingly comfortable with where they had ended up.

"I wondered if you could help me out. I was looking for a costume for Halloween." She said sounding hopeful.

"Yah, so how can I help?" he said eyeing the arrancar, just in case…

"I wondered if I could borrow some of your clothes—just for the day!" she amended.

"HAH?" was Renji's quick witted response, whereas with Grimmjow "What's that?!"

Ichigo too seemed puzzled by her request. "Why?"

"Oh it's nothing weird or like…occult-ish or anything." waving her hands rapidly in front of her.

"It's just…" sighing "Neither one of them were too keen on me being the other person, and I'm kinda out of ideas. I mean, I wanted something different, mind you it probably doesn't make a whole lot of difference since I don't see us going trick or treating…"

"It's the principle of the thing." She finalized.

"Okaaaay…so what did you have in mind?"

Thinking for a moment "Well, like maybe just a shirt or something…?"

"I mean nothing too weird and whatnot. Like I don't need your pants…"

Failing to see the guys' reactions at hearing her even mention the word pants in this situation, the further this went on the worse their dispositions.

"I'm fairly certain I have some that will work…" she was saying as Ichigo allowed her to riffle through his shirts, till she found one that she liked. She settled on one that said "Nice Vibe", accented by a star by the end of the second word.

"Awesome! Thanks Ichigo!" flinging her arms around the boy, she hugged him tightly while he had a mini panic attack, keeping his hands off her. Meanwhile the boys witnessing this tried to contain their emotions; one filled with hate and obvious jealousy, the other a slight pang of dismissal and confusion.

Giggling happily, Suzu smiled and excused herself thanking him once more before the trio departed. Outside she was practically skipping in her excitement.

"Well that worked out!"

There was only silence from her comrades but she didn't appear to notice.

"While we're out I think we should get some pumpkins. Then we can carve them!"

Hopping off, the boys followed without enthusiasm; already hating this stupid holiday.

After procuring a couple pumpkins, they made it back home, setting them down on the counter in the kitchen. Having also purchased a booklet of designs and a pair of saf-T knives, she lay down some towels for the inevitable mess they were sure to make.

Flipping through its pages, she landed on a design of a cat on a fence post. It reminded her a bit of Kuroh. Deciding this was what she wanted, she picked up her knife, ready to make the first incision.

"Here goes." Pushing in, but not too far she found it surprisingly easy to cut. Pleased by this she continued, making small punctures where she determined they needed to be, what with not having any actual lines to follow. Nevertheless she had it started pretty nicely.

"Cool!" she exclaimed excitedly. While she was having a good time the boys were most definitely not. They stared at the pumpkin placed before them like willing it to move on its own.

"What are we supposed to do?" voiced the soul reaper. He hadn't ever seen a pumpkin before, let alone know how to carve one. Staring at it more intently he thought about it.

"Maybe I can cut it with my Zabimaru…"

"Che, who cares." said the panther. "Just smash the damn thing!"

"Aww, c'mon! Don't do that!" At this point Suzu had remembered that the guts needed to be removed from the pumpkin before she carved the face. Her fingers were covered in pumpkin guts, as she smiled.

"See? Isn't this fun?" she said wiggling her messy fingers. When neither responded she decided to up the ante.

Walking towards them slowly she waggled her phalanges menacingly. "If you two don't start having fun I'm going to touch you with my gunky fingers!"

"Tch, sorry but I'm not intimidated." Replied Renji smugly; Grimmjow gave her a look that said 'touch me and die' so her threat met its end. Sighing dejectedly she went back to her mess only to discover Kuroh pawing at the seeds on the floor. Smiling she watched him with renewed vigor.

"At least somebody is with me." Finishing cutting out the entrails she stared at the clueless duo. "You could at least try to dress up. You never know, it could be fun!"

Grimmjow scoffed and walked off, going for the TV. "I think I'll pass." said the Shinigami as he followed suit.

_Figures; the one time they agree._

A couple hours later and her pumpkin was finished. While maybe not the best, she was still pleased with it. Outside the sun was at its peak; in a few hours it would be dark.

Cleaning the pumpkin guts up and washing her hands, she placed her pumpkin outside, a sense of pride and accomplishment within her. Back inside she went upstairs and changed into some guy cargo pants and put on Ichigo's borrowed shirt. Looking at herself in the mirror she smiled even wider. Going back downstairs she noted the lack of both boys.

Seeing the opportunity she slipped on her shoes and was out the door, locking it behind her. Giggling she was so excited. Her first Halloween!

Making it to her first stop, she rang the bell and waited. Orihime answered and beheld the girl before her. "Oh Suzu!"

"Trick or treat!" she exclaimed, happily. Laughing, "It feels so awesome to say that!"

"Oh! I don't have anything to give you." Replied the orange haired girl sadly.

"That's alright. I didn't bring a bag anyway."

"I just wanted to come by and wish you a Happy Halloween! See my outfit?"

"Oh, that's Ichigo's!" smiling "You look just like him!"

"Thanks!"

They talked for a bit more before Orihime excused herself saying that her friend Tatsuki would be by soon. Understanding, she left and went by her other locations, visiting Uryu, Chad and even Urahara. Coming to her last stop she knocked on the door and moments later a ghost pirate jumped out at her, giving her a momentary scare.

Laughing she remembered who it was from earlier, saying hi to his dad.

"Oh Ichigo! I thought you were upstairs. But here you are; how is that?"

"Dad, you know who that is." Said Yuzu.

"Yeah it's Ichigo."

"What are you talking about?" said the real Ichigo.

"Oh! What's this! There are two Ichigos!" running to his poster, "Oh Misaki! Our son is multiplying! What do I dooooo!?"

Giving a frustrated sigh, "Just ignore him. Come inside."

Just as he was about to close the door two more guests showed up; Renji and Grimmjow.

"What do you think you're doing!" clearly the espada was unhappy.

"You just disappeared." said Renji.

"Ah, sorry 'bout that. But I thought you guys didn't like Halloween." She said smartly.

"Yeah well, I like being left with **him** even less."

"What was that Shinigami!"

Before a real fight could break out Ichigo stopped them. "Could you guys just shut up and get inside so I can close the freakin' door?"

Glaring but calling a momentary truce, they decided to join the group. All together the Kurosaki family played games and bobbed for apples, while upstairs the quartet had their own kind of fun( in a non-suggestive way…); telling scary stories, making fun of each other and getting in fights that Suzu would have to break up. She had to admit it was fun.

All in all the best Halloween she could have asked for. _Now what about next year…_


	8. The only fear is fear itself and spiders

Hey all! Hope everyone is well and not too disappointed by how long this chapter took... it was a little difficult but it was my own fault. i kept thinking up stuff that sounded good but i decided against adding them until some time in the future. Meh.

Though the other day i was on lovely YouTube and discovered something that made my freakin' day! (or morning by then). Its a yaoi called A Foreign Love Affair (well that's the english title) but the best part of it besides the yaoi goodness was the voices for the main couple...I looked it up cause one sounded soo familair and as it turned out i was right, the Uke was the japanese voice for Renji and to add a HUGE cherry on top the Seme was GRIMMJOW!!! No lie!! ITS GREAT! there are two OVAs to this and it IS mature i will warn you now, but its SOO good and oddly perfect! in fact the one who is Ranmaru/Renji has brown eyes and Al/Grimmjow has blue! Its perfect!! hahaha

sorry for the long rant but i could Not get over this! Sigh, i have no life..nevertheless if you want i'd look it up and laugh with this knowledge (like i did). Also you should look up Matthew Morrison singing Younger than springtime. He's GOOD!

Anyway, i do not own these delicious men, nor take credit for the songs used. Younger than springtime from South Pacific and Are you that somebody by the deceased Aaliyah.

And i don't take rights to Glee either, i just like to give it its proper dues! (holy crap, this is the longest note ever..)

Enjoy! i tried to make this one longer.

11/10/09

A couple days went by and nothing much happened. The boys were still themselves; meaning they still had it out for each other and just generally didn't get along.

Suzu had enjoyed herself at the Halloween party and she thought that maybe they had too, but perhaps that was just wishful thinking on her part. In reality it was unlikely they would ever see eye to eye, just fist to fist.

The birds chirped and chattered happily outside as Suzu lay in bed sleeping. It was still morning but late, the afternoon creeping up slowly. Roused by the ruckus from the trees outside her window, she stirred but refused to open her eyes, still greedily clinging to sleep. Mother Nature it seemed had other ideas, the birds grew louder in the chirps sounding more like shrill squawks, forcing Suzu to wakefulness though regretfully.

Rolling over so as to lie on her back, she stared at the ceiling for a bit then sat up. Rubbing the sleep from her eyes she stretched preparing to get up when…

"OH MY FUCKING GOD!"

Freaked out she fell out of bed, staring in abject horror. On her wall close to her bed was the BIGGEST, blackest spider she had ever seen! Japan was known for having fairly huge, hairy black spiders but so far Suzu had lucked out and never come face to face with one. But this…

It moved, crawling further up the wall and she screamed bloody murder, like it had touched her. Soon Renji appeared, startled to see her on the floor.

"Suzu, what's wrong!?"

Pointing she feebly gestured to the monster on her wall "Spi-Spider! BIG spider!"

"Is THAT all?" the Sexta had finally shown up, scratching his head, like he had just woken up.

"B-but look at it!" she stammered, "It's---HUGE!"

"Che, stupid."

Standing up she glared at the panther and at the soul reaper who looked like he was trying to hide a grin. They were making fun of her, laughing at her expense!

"Fine. If you're through mocking me then do something about that THING!" she snapped frostily.

"Alright, alright; I got it." Renji said trying to pacify the pissed girl. Approaching it he thought of how to best get rid of the beastie and not freak Suzu out more. He reached out to it, making as if to shoo it causing Suzu to gasp and grab at his sleeve. "Watch out! It could bite!" she cautioned.

He paused, sighing exasperatedly and Grimmjow piped in.

"Just fucking kill it!"

"No! We can't!" cried Suzu. "It's bad luck!"

Hurriedly she looked up said beastie on her laptop; it was a spider called Take ashi daka and said to be harmless. Still it didn't mean she had to _like_ it.

"It's a **good** bug…" She said trying to sound happy about this but obviously still nervous. I mean it's freakin' **Huge**; like tarantula sized, maybe bigger than that, at least legs wise. As she stared at it uncertainly, Renji noted her death like grip on his shihakusho, still gripping his sleeve.

_She's scared._

"Che, if you won't do it, then I will." Grimmjow lifted his arm extending his hand; he would destroy it alright.

"You idiot!" Renji screamed. "You can't do that!"

Grimmjow's hand started to glow with the power. "Why not?"

"You can't use a cero, you'll destroy the house!"

Grimmjow didn't seem to care, taking aim on the spider.

Thwack, as Renji's hand collided with the panther's face, now blocking his path.

"You dumbass!"

Clenching his teeth, Grimmjow growled the spider long forgotten. He turned his cero on the Shinigami.

"Big mistake."

Renji grabbed his arm, deflecting the fist of doom as they struggled, both trying to gain the upper hand. Meanwhile Suzu still stricken by her sudden paralyzing fear of giant insects seemed not to care that her house was in peril of being decimated.

Slowly she regained her movement backing away from them and _it_. "I'll just…sleep downstairs from now on…" she said voice small.

Quickly retreating she left the boys to their quarrel. Rushing downstairs, she hid on the couch, burying herself in the TV trying to rid herself of that ghastly image. She flipped through the channels a bit, not really seeing the images depicted. After a while she gave up, having landed on a kiddy show she didn't watch, sitting with her arms around her legs pressed to her chest.

Really it wasn't the spider that freaked her out so much as the memories that came with it; her mother and their life before the accident that shattered Suzu's world.

A heavy sigh escaped her lips as tears were born and fell from her eyes. You wouldn't think it from her normal demeanor but it hurt internally and though it happened several years ago, each day was a trial.

Meanwhile upstairs the battle had been reduced to a battle of words as they flung insults at one another, like playing ping pong. Naturally neither was willing to back down and they were quite evenly matched in their trash talking.

Ironically enough, in the midst of their arguing the creepy crawly they had been fighting about crawled away, back out the open window in which it came.

At an impasse and out of new insults, they settled for glaring contemptuously. It was Renji who noticed that Suzu was missing.

Rudely brushing passed the arrancar he went looking for her downstairs. The Sexta didn't like being ignored, especially by a fucking Shinigami, so he went too.

They found her in front of the TV, still visibly shaken.

"Hey, I think the spider is gone now, so…" she looked like she had been crying and as testament of this she wiped her eyes before turning to acknowledge the red head.

"Right, thanks." She smiled feebly trying to regain her cheerful persona. Unfortunately it was already too late, they both had noticed.

Renji's expression hardened just a bit, confused. He sat by her on the couch not saying anything. She had resumed 'watching' the TV unseeingly.

Avoiding the obvious question, "What are you watching?"

"Oh, uhh…You know, I have no clue." She said giggling a bit lackluster. Grimmjow was still standing by the couch, though his face was turned from them like he didn't care, but he was definitely listening to what was said.

After a minute of stillness, Renji glanced at her. It was apparent she wasn't going to talk to him on her own, so finally he had to ask.

"Did the spider bother you that much?"

He gauged her reaction as her eyes hooded and with it her unimpressive reiatsu shifted. She sat for a while mulling over her answer; on the one hand she knew that telling someone about what had happened could possibly ease the burden on her heart, yet at the same time it would mean admitting the truth of the situation, something she didn't think she could do.

When she didn't answer Renji was tempted to ask again what was bothering her, but then she spoke.

"No." she answered truthfully. "It really didn't. There's something else…"

Now both men were paying attention. She looked to Renji. "I don't think—that I can say it though…" she said. "Not yet at least."

Realizing she must have her reasons he didn't push any further. Instead he gave her a reassuring smile and said "That's fine by me. I'll be here when you're ready to talk."

She had unfolded her legs from her person and stared at him in awe. At that moment he looked so cool. She had a sudden urge to hug him but fought off her desire or would have had she any willpower. She put her arms around the suddenly stiff Shinigami, hugging him.

"Thank you Renji." She said sounding most sincere.

Put in an awkward situation, he didn't know what to do; no one had hugged him before. Sitting still he waited until she released him, both relieved but also somewhat disappointed.

She smiled genuinely before her empty stomach made itself known. "Oh! That's right, I haven't eaten yet!"

Standing up she walked passed Grimmjow, not seeing his displeased face and went to the kitchen to rough up some grub. While she was fishing around for what she needed, Grimmjow was busy staring a hole in the Shinigami.

"Something you want?" said Renji. The arrancar had been staring at him for the past five minutes and he was startin' to get mad.

Oh there was something he wanted alright, to bash in his stupid Shinigami skull! However before he could act on his murderous intent the girl came back, bowl of rice porridge in hand.

Seeing the TV she squealed in delight. "OH! Lilo and Stitch!" plopping herself back down on the couch, she sat next to Renji, smiling and excited.

Of course he had no idea what that was but she seemed happy nonetheless and over her upset, so he really didn't mind.

Grimmjow was tired of being ignored so he sat down on her opposite side, so she was now sandwiched between the two males. While she was glued to the tube the boys shot one another meaningful dirty looks, unintentionally fighting over her.

After eating and watching a few cartoons, Suzu decided to venture back into her room, though a bit reluctant still. She approached her door and pushed it lightly, waiting till it swung open revealing a bit more.

She went in with caution, like it had been quarantined because a deadly virus was released. When in reality it was just her and her fears from the past making themselves known in the present.

Not seeing the spider didn't make her any less nervous; it could still be in the room and just have moved. Seeing the open window she tiptoed to it and after several still moments, in a burst of courage slammed it closed.

After that was done she inspected every inch of space in her room, checking everything and finding nothing. Only then did she breathe a sigh of relief.

Getting on her computer she went to her favored destination YouTube and went to her saved videos. She figured a good dose of music would put her more at ease. Finding an appropriate song she started jamming in her chair, singing with the song.

'Boy, I been watching you like the hawk in the sky up high  
and you are my prey (my prey).  
Boy, I promise you if we keep grippin' hands  
I know that one of these days (days)  
we goin' hook it up, while we talk on the phone  
But see, I don't know if that's good.  
I been holding back this secret from you  
I probably shouldn't tell it...'

Grimmjow meanwhile was lurking around, still pissed at the Shinigami, feeling very much like he wanted to destroy something. He came instinctively to Suzu's room finding her door this time open.

She was singing and grooving along with the song and had yet to notice him though he stood blatantly staring at her. He watched her for a few moments before coming fully into her room.

'Oh boy, see I'm trusting you with my heart, my soul  
I probably shouldn't let ya...

If I let this go,  
you can't tell nobody,  
I'm talkin' bout nobody.  
I hope you're responsible  
Boy I gotta watch my back,  
"'Cause I'm not just anybody"  
Is it my go, or is it your go?  
Sometimes I'm goody-goody  
Right now I'm naughty-naughty.  
Say yes or say no  
'Cause I really need somebody  
Tell me are you that somebody?'

She was so into her song she didn't notice his presence until he was right behind her, startling her.

"Holy Hell!" she screamed, flailing around to face him. After calming her heart a bit, "Geeze! Do you just enjoy sneaking up on people like that, or it is just for me?"

She stared at him but when he didn't respond she got worried. Turning off the music, she stood up.

He had heard her, but his mind was elsewhere. He was replaying what happened in the living room, with her and the Shinigami filth. Grimmjow absolutely _despised_ that guy and when she hugged him his ire rose a notch higher. So many times had he wished to kill the bastard but he didn't strangely.

He walked towards her, slowly closing what little gap there had been between them. Now her face was at chest level, making Suzu look up to clearly see his face.

Confused she queried, "What, uh, do you want?" When he continued to stare, she backed up a little more asking "What? Was Renji busy or—"

He walked forward more, making her back up right into her bed which caused her to sit rather than come face first with lean muscle. Confused she looked quizzically to him for answers but the Sexta held an unreadable gaze.

Before she could ask again, he suddenly leaned down, face even with her own and very close. As he inched forward, Suzu's insides did a summersault, her heart pounding. _Was this really going to happen?_

Just before lips could meet, a bark was heard, scaring Suzu and shattering the atmosphere.

"Shiro!" she said leaping up "What do you want boy? Huh?" she scratched the dog as the neglected panther glared, eyeing the intruder.

Seeing the time she figured what was wrong. "You hungry? Aww, poor thing!" Petting him as he wagged enthusiastically she got up.

"Ok boy, let's go." They left the Sexta more sulky and vengeful than he had been.

Later as the day was drawing to a close, the gang was assembled downstairs in front of the Tube once more. Glee was on, and Suzu was enjoying every minute of it! She went from laughing uproariously to tears in a matter of minutes.

But sadly all good things have to end and quickly enough it was over. Bored and mad since the cancellation of Eastwick she decided to get on YouTube to get more Glee goodness.

She already had a couple of her favorite songs saved from the show and happily showed the boys. One of them was Mr. Schuester singing the thong song to Emma. This one always made her laugh and when he wiggled his butt she smiled like the perv she was, much to the guys' disgust.

Although not without its awkwardness for Suzu as Renji asked "What's a thong?" rather matter of fact.

Blushing deeply, Suzu could only stammer a bit, flustered but also a bit put off he would think to ask her. "It's a type of….underwear. For girls." She clarified.

When they both looked at her she huffed "Well I don't wear them!"

They continued staring, making her blush harder.

"Can we—change the subject please!" Grimmjow 'ched' and Renji looked elsewhere, so she resumed her video viewing albeit ears burning.

As she was looking up Glee music she stumbled upon something. Clicking it, she discovered Matthew Morrison who plays Mr. Schue in a rendition of South Pacific singing her favorite song in the musical. Her eyes widened and happily she listened, eyes watery.

'Younger than springtime, are you  
Softer than starlight, are you,  
Warmer than winds of June,  
Are the gentle lips you gave me.  
Gayer than laughter, are you,  
Sweeter than music, are you,  
Angel and lover, heaven and earth,  
Are you to me.'

Quickly becoming taken up in the marvelous and awe inspiring performance she joined in with vigor.

'And when your youth  
And joy invade my arms,  
And fill my heart as now they do,  
Then younger than springtime, am I,  
Gayer than laughter, am I,  
Angel and lover, heaven and earth,  
Am I with you!'

She didn't know it but they were watching with rapt interest, unaware of even each other at the moment. When she finished the boys broke away, no longer enthralled, going their separate ways. Renji went upstairs while the espada ransacked her fridge, still opposites as before.

But just for a moment they had been the same.


	9. The cold

Okay! finally got this one done! YESH! took me some time because i was ...well let's face it, lazy and getting too freakin' tired when i should have been typing. that and i had a bad case of procrastination. EEEEKK, BADNESS!!

ah well, thus is life and in any event, after this chapter things get interesting! WOOT!! hopefully this is not sucky, but i did almost write 8 pages worth (when i finally buckled down and wrote) and that is WAY more than i was aiming for..soooo YAY?

I do not own these beautiful, beautiful men, though it would make life much better for me.

11/23/09

Two days later

Having just woken up, Suzu rolled over sluggishly getting up. Rubbing her eyes, she yawned and went about her usual routine. Already today was a much better day, no spiders had been creepily hovering over her as she slept and her emotional display from before was past her. The only thing she could detect was slight soreness in her throat but that was minor; certainly nothing to be concerned about.

Heading downstairs after a quick shower and change of clothes she made her breakfast and by the time the boys got up her sore throat had vanished.

She was feeding the animals when they came downstairs.

Seeing her up "Oh, morning Suzu." Renji greeted.

"Good morning!" she smiled cheerfully, while the animals engulfed her with love. She stood up, calling after him "Can I make you something?" she offered.

He was in the kitchen, already in the fridge. "Ah, no that's alright. I got it." He continued to rummage all the while his face a bit flushed.

Truth be told this was first time for her to ask him such a thing; in fact for anyone of her gender and he wasn't sure what to think of it.

Hell, he still didn't know what to think of _her_ or what he may or may not feel for her. It was confusing, to say the least.

Grimmjow however had no such problems, a feeling of revulsion at their little display making his face sour as he came down the stairs. Glaring at the soul reaper, he turned his attention to the girl who was once more entangled in furry bodies' courtesy Shiro and Kuroh.

It seemed after their 'heart to heart' from a couple days ago that Suzu was no longer shy about her more than obvious feelings for the Shinigami, though he was as clueless as ever.

She wasn't even trying to _hide_ it now, from what Grimmjow observed; a fact that riled him to no end.

Frustrated he went for the couch, turning on the TV suddenly unable to look at her at the moment. Unfortunately for him Suzu came over, joining him on the couch unaware of his lingering resentment. She watched as he flipped furiously through the channels, not realizing it was because he was pissed and not simply because he was male.

A few minutes passed in this fashion before she thought to say anything.

"Grimmjow, what's the point of watching TV when you're not 'watching' it?" she observed. "If you slowed down maybe you'd find—"She saw the sudden insufferable look as he glared at her, and with that her mouth closed.

Sitting quiet and stiff she wondered at his rude attitude. What had _she_ done? Instead of getting mad however she became a little worried. After all he had never directed that look at her before. Lost in her negativity she didn't see the creature approach until he jumped on her, nestling into her lap.

"Kuroh. What are you doing, little kitty?" he only purred and licked at her hand, kneading her thigh.

She had always heard that animals could sense when people weren't feeling well, so maybe this was his way of cheering her up. She smiled, petting him and cooing to him affectionately.

Grimmjow saw the hairy disgrace and the way she treated it. It was more disgusting in some ways than her behavior with the red head. She continued to cuddle the beast until he could no longer stand it, about to rip it out of her arms until…

"AH-CHOO!" having covered her nose just in time, she wiped it off on her pants' leg.

"Ugh. Well that was kinda gross." Seeing Kuroh's face, she pet him again. "Sorry about that."

A few seconds later she sneezed again, barely able to cover it. Sniffing she had no choice but to snuff some back up, a decidedly disgusted face shown.

"Blegh. That one was worse…"

"Are you alright?" said Renji from behind her.

"Yah, no big. It's just allergies I bet." She said but seeing the pleased look on the Sexta she added "And no I am NOT allergic to the cat! Jerk…"

"Che."

A minute passed and nothing happened. Smiling "See I told you; it was just—CHOO!"

Sneezing again it was hard to deny; she was getting sick. _Crap _she bemoaned internally. But still she stubbornly held on, refusing to admit her weakness.

"Ah, I'm sure that was just a fluke. Hehe, really." She smiled innocently, trying to hold back the sniffle she so badly needed right then.

Coming around to the front of the couch, Renji stared at her bent over, parallel with her face. "Is that right?" he asked monotone.

Seeing him in front of her in her face startled her, yet made her heart throb all the same. "Y-Yes?" she said though it came out as a question.

Giving her time to fess up, he stood and stared at her, a knowing look in his eyes. He could see it; the evidence was right on her face and yet she wouldn't tell the truth.

Why was she lying to him?

Grimmjow on the other hand could care less she was lying. He was too preoccupied with the Shinigami's closeness and sudden interest in the girl and her well being. He was practically on top of her! (In the Sexta's mind) It was one thing for the abominable cat beast to be sitting there, marking her with its fur but for it to be _Him_! He ground his teeth, fist clenched. He would put an end to this!

Standing he took aim and was about to strike when…"Ah-CHOOO!" a devastating blow indeed…

"UGH, that sucked…"

Quirking a brow, "More like blew, your nose is leakin'" Renji said.

Realizing quickly this was case "Aww, crap!" removing the feline from herself, she got up. "Sorry boy, down ya go."

Going to the kitchen she grabbed a paper towel, blowing into it with a honking sound. After thorough cleansing, she felt a bit better if icky. "Ugh." She said.

Meeting her "I knew it." Renji said. "Why did ya lie to me?" Grimmjow had followed as well, eyeing his back.

Looking down "I don't know…I guess I didn't want to worry you." She began.

"Besides, I didn't even know I was sick until a bit ago." She said honestly. "The only hint I had was a sore throat when I got up, but that went away."

"Sorry." She said looking him in the eye. "I guess I'm still used to dealing with stuff on my own."

Softening a bit "Nah, that's alright." The red head said. "Ain't nothing to forgive."

She smiled, clearly thrilled while Grimmjow gagged. They were acting like a couple and it pissed him off.

"Che, what you hafta be quarantined now?" Grimmjow griped, gaining her attention.

"Eh? No, it's just a cold…" Though this triggered a thought.

"Wait, do I?" she voiced. They looked at her strangely.

"I mean, can you guys catch this?"

Stunned a bit, they responded "I'm dead." surprisingly in unison, much to their chagrin.

"Well I mean we _can_ get sick, I guess. I mean it's possible." Renji said, thinking of Captain Ukitake who seemed almost always under the weather. She seemed alarmed so he had to continue.

"But I mean, never anything like a cold, as far as I know."

Grimmjow sneered "Ha, pathetic. You Shinigami really are weak." Renji glared.

"I'm an arrancar. You think a cold is going to destroy _me_? Don't lump me in with **him**."

They eyed each other, while she breathed a sigh of relief.

"Well that's one less thing to worry about." She said happily then immediately sneezed again.

As the day progressed so did her cold and her sneezing. Every time she would sneeze she would feel the immediate desire to do so again; it was a never ending chain.

With her sneezing came many a tissue, paper towel, or whatever was handy at the time (including the collar of her shirt on multiple occasions).

Having a running nose led to drainage and that eventually led to coughing, which led to headaches for her and the boys who were with her…

By the second day, her cough got much worse and so did the panther's temper.

"Will you stop your goddamn coughing!" he groused. "It's fuckin' annoying!"

"I would if I could!" she yelled back then coughed pathetically. "Why are you being so growly? I can't help being sick…"

"The hell you can't." he said with a glare. He had put up with this shit for two days now and he was tired of it.

She coughed again, going to the kitchen sink, trying desperately to hack up the filth from her lungs albeit unsuccessfully.

She sneezed again, blowing her abused nose dejectedly and he felt a twinge of remorse. Turning away from her, "Get better already goddamn it!" adding, "It's annoying."

She stared at his back letting the odd 'get well' sentiment sink in fully. With anyone else that would have seemed rude and incredibly harsh but knowing the Sexta as she did, she knew an insult when lobbed her way and that was most definitely not.

Was he concerned about her? Surely not; but still…

After a moment's hesitation, "Yeah, I'll try." She responded quietly.

"Try what?" the soul reaper queried.

Suzu started to say something but the Sexta interrupted.

"None of your business, Shinigami!"He snapped.

Brows furrowed, their oncoming dispute was halted by her hacking cough, then sneezing. Sheepishly she apologized then excused herself saying, "I guess I need to take more medicine."

Heading up the stairs she went to the bathroom to take her cough medicine. Though she loathed having to take it, it did help at least a bit in temporarily relieving her cough.

The guys having followed her watched as she poured the bright blue liquid into the cap, measuring out the dose. Suzu rather liked the color, as it reminded her of the espada's hair.

The taste however was near unbearable; almost not worth the momentary pause it gave her wretched coughing.

The boys watched her face change to utter revulsion as she swallowed the vile substance, taking shuddered breaths and screwing her eyes closed.

"Bleagh, that's gross!" she complained, a pained look about her.

"Why does something supposedly good for you have to taste so disgusting?"

Shaking her head, she looked disdainfully at the near empty bottle. She would have to go get more soon. Going past them, she went downstairs to get her shoes, fully intent on going but a hand stopped her.

"What are you doing?" Renji asked.

"Oh. Well I was going to go to the drugstore…I'm almost out of that putrid-er, helpful medicine." She amended.

"We can go for you." At the use of the word 'we' Grimmjow made a face, not liking this inclusion.

"Oh" she began, "You don't have to do that." Though a kind gesture, one that made her sick heart flutter, it was entirely unnecessary. Besides, she was fine.

"I'm fin-"sneezing, Renji was naturally unconvinced. "Yeah." He said. "You stay here. We'll go."

"But-"

"There's no _we_." Grimmjow stated plainly.

"Got that Shinigami?" he really didn't like the soul reaper thinking he could tell him what to do. **He** wasn't in charge; the sooner the red head learned that, all the better it would be for him.

"Well I'm not leaving her here with _you._" Renji stared at the panther as he glared back. The head captain didn't trust the arrancar alone and neither did Renji; he'd be a fool to think to trust the bastard.

Once again it came down to a staring match and once again Suzu would have to break it up. Stepping to the side of the duo, she took a deep breath.

"Alright, look." She said placing her hands on their arms. "How 'bout this: you stop fighting and agree to a truce" at this the Sexta glared angrily. She continued on like she didn't see it. "And I will let you guys go in my place."

"Like I would ever agree to that!" the Sexta snapped.

"Oh, you think you're too good to come with me? Or are you just too intimidated by me?" Renji smirked at the downright hateful stare he received, the panther about to explode.

Meanwhile Suzu was wishing she were a little bit taller so she could properly smack them in their stupid heads. Deciding to take the high road, she tried again, this time more openly.

"While I appreciate the sentiment (at least she hoped that was what it was) I'm really okay by myself."

"After all, I've been by myself for a while until you guys came." Eyes downcast, she gave their arms a minute squeeze, unaware.

"What's another hour or two?" she looked up to them as they looked to her, happy to have gotten their attention. Smiling she let go.

"Now hurry up. I think I feel a tickle coming on."

After some grumbling on the panther's behalf and instructions on where to go and what to get, the pair headed out.

They took a short detour to retrieve Renji's gigai but before long they were at their destination. A little uncertain, Renji gulped down his reservations and walked in, marveled at how the doors opened and then closed behind unattended.

He stared in awe and confusion at the busy bustling aisles full of people going about the usual routine of modern life. Grimmjow however stood like always, hands in pockets and slouching posture, staring down the worthless creatures called humans. Each and every one of them was unimpressive and weak.

Renji confirming the Sexta was there eyed him, silently warning him not to do anything stupid and then went to search for the item they needed.

From the outside you wouldn't think it, but it was surprisingly spacious and fortunately not too crowded. Locating the right aisle, he now just needed the right stuff. But there were so many kinds with different flavors and promises of quick relief.

Looking around him everyone else seemed to know what they wanted, snatching items off the shelves without much thought. He glanced at his list, containing a single article.

Just then, "Hey, Renji!" someone called to him. Turning he saw Ichigo accompanied by his two sisters.

"Oh Ichigo."

"What are you doing here?" asked the orange haired kid.

"Suzu is sick. I was supposed to get her medicine."

"She is huh? Well, can't be helped. So what do you need?" Renji seemed lost, which is partly why he asked.

"Uh, well. Here" He said handing him the piece of paper. Ichigo looked at it for a second then he quickly browsed the aisle and found what was needed.

"Here" He handed it to the red head.

"Yeah, thanks."

"Ichigo!" a dark reiatsu appeared behind the boy and with it a fixated individual.

"Grimmjow!" Ichigo stumbled back a bit, unused to seeing him in public places. "What the hell, Renji?"

"I had to bring him." He said eyeing the energized arrancar. "I'm not supposed to leave him alone, remember."

"Yeah well, will you get him outta my face!" he said, trying to ward him off like he would a regular spirit.

"Ichigo!" it was then his sisters appeared, Yuzu followed by Karin.

"Oh, Ichigo, you found a friend." Yuzu said, bowing politely. Only seeing Renji "But who were you just yelling at a minute ago?"

"UH…" stumped he didn't know what to say. He didn't want her knowing about evil spirits more than she did; certainly no one like Grimmjow.

"They're just guys being dumb guys." Karin responded quite quickly. "They have their own way of things."

"Okay." She said easily. "I'll go find dad."

After she left Karin stayed, staring at Grimmjow as she could clearly see him. She got a bad feeling from him, like before with the creature Chad fought or the one with that white haired boy Toshiro.

Pissed off, "Get lost kid." said Grimmjow. Her face hardened more, so Ichigo interrupted.

"Hey, why don't you go find dad and Yuzu. I'll meet up with you in a little while."

She consented but glared hatefully back at the Sexta before she went. Breathing a sigh of relief Ichigo decided he never wanted to do that again. Bidding them goodbye, he told Renji to say hey for him to Suzu and tell her he hoped she got better.

Having gotten what he needed they checked out and after dropping his gigai back off at Urahara's they went back home.

"Hey! We're back!" a couple minutes of silence followed and she didn't turn up. As he was heading for the stairs, he heard something from the couch. Seeing her sprawled out asleep, he smiled bemusedly. He watched her sleep unaware the Sexta did too, their truce from before still withstanding.

At least for the time being…


	10. Heartbreaker pt 2

Okay so this is the LONGEST chapter i have ever written and may ever write. seriously it is like, thiiis close to being 12 f-ing pages long! i was like this will only be what 7 or 8 pages but DAMN! it just kept going! good news; you get a uber hefty, loaded with surprising goodness chapter. bad news; i may never be able to duplicate it... nevertheless i hope i make some people happy and for others i hope i have not just ruined your christmas.

on a related-ish note, the lastest chapter of Bleach( for those keeping up to date) made me squeal with glee, i was soo FREAKIN' happy! Add to that the recent discovery of an Aizen plush (Finally!) though not the correct size for my taste, it is shaping up to be an excellent holiday.

Do not own these two hotties therein and i do not take credit for the song Save me by Jem. it is an excellent song though.

Enjoy and oh! for everybody reading this and all who have reviewed, faved and alerted this (and me) i FREAKIN' LOVE YOU GUYS!!! seriously, you make me sooo happy! -Smile-

12/5/09

A week later

The day started out like any other day, which is to say the usual mundane routine spiced up by craziness only other worldly beings could cause.

Her cold had been banished a few days prior and she was back to herself, as normal as weird permitted. One thing not remedied however was her lovesickness and puppy dog dreams; she was still very much infatuated with a certain tattoo sporting, red headed, clueless Shinigami and it was beginning to grate at her.

She didn't know what to be more irritated with; the Shinigami or her immense desire to be with him. It was more than complicated, there were so many variables, most of which ended in failure on her part.

The fact that he was, by all rights and in technical terms 'dead' did not go by unnoticed; Nor did the moral implications of being 'involved' with a dead guy. But that aside there was still the feelings of the Shinigami himself and largely how he felt about her as compared to Rukia… a rather dismal path indeed.

Even getting past that and in the event that, in the event he reciprocated and she was fine with being intimate with a technical modern day zombie, there were still problems to be had for sure.

He would still be a Shinigami and she would not want for him to give that up simply for her sake or the convenience of not having to live and travel between two worlds.

On top of that the situation here at home would be altered and she was pretty sure the Sexta would have a major problem with it, despite what he felt for her (which in her mind was still confusingly vague). For someone so easily riled and spiteful towards soul reapers, he was sure to have input on the subject and it was sure to be hateful and unhelpful.

It was all so frustrating and definitely not good for her health, both mental and physical.

Nevertheless she tried to remain neutrally upbeat and be glad that he was here, even if not in the way she wanted.

To help herself in this endeavor she decided to go to YouTube and look up cute videos of animals! After all who could resist impossibly adorable animals doing unspeakably adorable things?

She started off with the surprised kitty that seemed so popular as of late and could definitely see the fame; it was so damn adorable! In one part it looked like it was doing jazz hands, so freakin' cute! The only thing she regretted was that the video was so short, a mere seventeen seconds. To make up for this fact she watched it about a dozen and one times, just for good measure.

Afterwards, at the suggestion of YouTube, she watched her previous favorite kitty video which showed two kittens fighting when a third kitten comes up and proceeds to throw up, causing the other two kittens to stop fighting and watch it do so. Normally this would seem gross and incredibly mean in some way but for whatever reason Suzu laughed herself to the point of tears and then proceeded to watch it again, much to the same result.

Many a cat video followed from there, some with cats going bonkers randomly, one with a kitten batting at the air from a fan, and mainly just kitties being their selves; adorable.

From that came adorable puppies, to other domestic pets, to drunken squirrels, till finally she reached the more exotic animals.

She loved red pandas and secretly wished she could have one, but watching videos of them would have to do. She watched several videos of the rambunctious furry critters only wanting them that much more, but then through that came regular black and white ones; giant pandas.

There was a newer video of a popular panda cub, now grown some from before, getting another check up and boy was he ever cute! He was definitely bigger than before; apparently pandas grew quickly. But he was so soft looking and cuddly! And the little noises he made were irresistible making her go 'aww'.

"What are you squealing about woman?" Grimmjow was standing behind her, a less than pleased look on his face.

She saw him and began squealing anew. "Lookit Grimmjow! Isn't it ADORABLE?!" she positively beamed with her giddiness but Grimmjow remained as usual.

He said nothing but cringed internally as the girl's voice rose to an even shriller degree. He didn't see how she could be so absorbed in something so revolting.

Though if given thought he supposed this was better than her shrieking over the Shinigami scum.

"Oh Renji, Look!" speaking of which…the Sexta sneered unhappily.

She showed the soul reaper the cuteness she had found and he likewise didn't get it. Seeing the arrancar standing there glaring he glared back equally. At the very least they had that much in common, level in their distrust and disgust of one another.

Realizing their attention was drawn elsewhere, Suzu sighed and gave up. She needed a squirt bottle filled with water to spray them with when they got like this. Hell maybe filled with hot sauce…

Shutting down her computer she went to her room, putting it away and when she came back downstairs they were still locked in place. They probably hadn't even noticed her departure or her return as she walked passed them to sit on the couch and watch some TV.

Soon her irritation with the boys melted and she was laughing along with the show. By the time Renji came over to sit next to her, she had all but forgotten about them and their petty squabbles.

Apparently they had given up, both tired and annoyed to the point they couldn't stand to look at one another anymore. Grimmjow disappeared and Renji and Suzu got to spend some quality time together (in Suzu's mind.)

Actually as she sat there, watching him from the corner of her eye, she couldn't help but wonder if he ever got homesick or missed the soul society. She remembered back when her mom was alive that she would often get homesick if she were away for an extended period of time, like if something came up in school, like a class trip. Every time that happened she missed her mom and would give her a big hug when she got back.

She wondered if he was the same and ventured her query out in the open.

"Renji, do you ever regret being here?"She said randomly.

Caught off guard he didn't know how to respond properly. "Uh…"

"What I mean is do you ever miss your home? Do you miss the soul society?"

He thought about it for a bit, glancing at the girl as she appeared uncertain; this meant a lot to her he figured. He decided being honest was the right thing to do so he told her.

"Well, sure." At her saddened expression, he rethought his next choice of words.

"I mean there are certain things I do miss about the soul society…" here he paused a breath, then pushed on. "But there are things that I don't as well."

"Like what?" she asked interested.

"Well, like paperwork for instance. I definitely don't miss that." She chuckled and he went on.

"And getting drug off to do stuff when I have no business or interest in being there in the first place." He thought of having to do calligraphy, flower arrangement, tea ceremonies and other odd things people had forced him into.

"And then there are the times when I have absolutely nothing to do."

"Oh?" she said. "You have down time?"

"Yah and it gets boring and so dull. Usually though in those instances I go train or fight someone who is also free." He left out the part where he would go drinking with Matsumoto, Izuru, and whoever else she had swindled into partying with her.

"Oh. Well that doesn't sound so bad." Though that got her thinking…

"It's not boring here, is it?" her heart was pounding, waiting for his answer. She hoped he liked it here. Whether that was because of selfish desires or genuine concern, she still wanted to know.

He smirked much to her relief. "Are ya' kidding me? Babysitting an arrancar, being in the human world, getting to mess with that carrot top Ichigo…what's not to like?"

She smiled, very much relieved though she did notice how he left her out of that list. Up till now she had contented herself with the fact that he was here in the first place, that she could see him every day. Even live under the same roof as he. But right now, more than anything, she wanted to tell him what she felt for him and find out if he felt the same.

"Renji" she began, nervous. "There's something I—"there was a sudden knock on the front door, interrupting her.

Curious she got up and answered the door, seeing a girl with a worried look on her face.

"Hello?" she started but was soon cut off. "Hi, I'm sorry to bother you but I'm looking for my dog, I can't find him anywhere and I'm getting really worried."

"Oh! Um, I'm sorry, I don't think I've seen any dog." She replied now suddenly feeling bad for the girl as her face immediately fell.

"I see…thanks anyway." She said and turned to leave, but Suzu called out to her.

"Wait! I can help you look for him." said Suzu. "The more people there are searching the better chance of finding him, right?"

"Really!?" she said her face brightened. "That would be great!"

"Sure." Suzu said. "Just let me put my shoes on and I'll join you."

Suzu put her shoes on and got ready to leave when Renji stopped her. "Hey…"

She turned to face him. "I'll be right back, I promise."

"Shouldn't I come too?"

"No, you stay here." She told him. "It's no big deal; we'll just go around the blocks. Plus it would be easier if I went alone. Then you don't have drag Grimmjow with us. I'm sure he would be less than thrilled."

"Yeah." She had a point. He released her and waving goodbye she closed the door to join the taller girl. She had been waiting with her back turned but asked, "Who were you just talking to?"

"Oh! Uh…" quickly she fumbled for an excuse.

"No one." She said. "I was talking to myself. Heh." She sheepishly scratched the back of her head and then said, "Shall we?"

They started walking up the street. "I'm Suzu by the way."

"Taki." The other girl replied.

"Nice to meet you." Said Suzu.

A few moments of silence ensued as they kept a look out for any strays.

"Thanks again for this. I appreciate it." Taki said.

"Sure thing; I have a couple pets of my own, so I understand."

Slowly as they walked, they got to know each other a bit better. Taki had actually been living in town for a few months now. She lived not far from Suzu. She unlike Suzu had a family, with a brother, her mom and dad; and of course their dog Tama.

Taki was several inches taller than Suzu and had short black hair done in a cute bob, longer in the front than in the back. Suzu's brown hair was much longer, closer to her shoulder blades. Their eyes were also a bit different; where Suzu's were a combination of blue and green, Taki had pure olive.

All in all she was a very pretty girl and had a bigger bust from what Suzu observed.

They searched for what seemed forever and yet came up empty handed, making Taki just a little more than freaked out.

When she started having a mini panic attack Suzu tried calming her down. But all her reasoning fell on scared ears. So thinking of what calmed _her_ down, she did what came natural in stressful situations.

'_I've gotta stop my mind  
Working overtime  
It's driving me insane.  
It will not let me live  
always so negative  
it's become my enemy._

_Save me ah ah save me ah ah  
Save me ah wooh  
Save me ah ah save me ah ah  
Save me ah wooh_

_Why would I think such things?  
Crazy thoughts have quick wings  
gaining momentum fast.  
One minute I am fine  
the next I've lost my mind  
to a fake fantasy_.'

As she sang, the melody filled her and Taki, slowly easing her fears. As odd as it seemed, it did the trick, and both before long were jamming to the invisible tune.

'_And none of these  
Thoughts are real  
So why is it that I feel  
So cut up and so bad  
I need to take control  
Coz my mind is on a roll  
And it isn't listening to me_

_Save me ah ah save me ah ah  
Save me ah wooh  
(thinking and thinking)  
Save me ah ah save me ah ah  
Save me ah wooh  
(thinking and thinking)_'

The thing was it worked on a couple levels, not only for Taki and her lost dog but for Suzu and her lost courage. She was so close to telling Renji how she really felt and part of her was still scared of rejection. As she sang she thought about him and hoped she would be strong enough to confess to him her feelings.

'_Mirror mirror on the wall  
who's the dumbest of them all?  
Insecurities keep growing  
wasted energies are flowing.  
Anger, pain and sadness beckon  
Panic sets in in a second.  
Be aware it's just your mind  
and you can stop it anytime.'_

By now they had traveled a much further distance and had gone out of their block and those surrounding. The sun was just beginning to lower in the sky.

'_Ok so here we go  
If it works I'll let you know  
One two three I say stop.'_

Just then a squeal released itself from Taki's vicinity and a bark responded in kind. Smiling Suzu watched as the pair reunited, Taki happily clutched him to her person as Tama slathered her in kisses.

Suzu very much a fan of happy endings was glad for the both of them. Shortly they headed back and by the time Suzu was saying her goodbyes to her newfound friends, the sun had almost set.

She made it back to her home just as the last vestiges of sunlight were streaking the sky. As she approached the door, Renji came out to meet her.

"Suzu…"

"Oh, hey; sorry we took a little longer than I planned. But good news is we found the dog!"

"Yeah?" he said. "That's good. I was starting to wonder where you were."

To this she blushed and then averted her gaze to the pretty sky. They stood both watching it for a time, though in truth her mind was only half concentrated. She kept thinking about her resolve to tell him the truth. If she didn't do it now, then she never would.

She secretly watched him for a little while longer than turning to him said "Hey, Renji?"

He turned to look at her, so she continued. "There's something…I want to tell you something."

She tried to find the words for it, to accurately describe what she felt, how she cared for him. Her hands were shaking so she fisted them at her side, but her heart wouldn't stop hammering.

"I'm—not sure how to say this, so this may be rocky but I have to tell you."

Here she took a big breath and then letting it out "Renji, I like—""Rukia" he said looking over her head.

"Huh?"

She turned to see his line of sight and coming towards them was the female soul reaper, dressed as he in her shihakusho. She appeared serious and in a rush.

"Rukia" he said again, "What's up—""Renji the head captain has asked for you to come back to the soul society. He says there's something important."

"Oh?" he seemed confused but after a moment he reluctantly agreed. "Alright" he said.

They began walking off, but Renji stopped abruptly. He glanced towards Suzu and asked "What about the arrancar?"

Rukia seemed to know he would ask replying "The head captain said not to worry, that would be taken care of. He just wanted you to come back as quickly as possible."

He nodded in acceptance and without a second glance they both went into what looked like a shoji screen door, disappearing.

Suzu stood there, as if in shock. Her mind was trying to comprehend what her eyes knew to be true.

After a minute, she went back inside; the sun had finally set and there was a chill to the air. She closed the door and removed her shoes, all with a quiet solemnity completely removed from the person she had been twenty minutes prior.

The animals she knew hadn't been fed, so before she could slink off up to her bedroom she did so, all the while her insides were numb.

Finally reaching her bedroom, she stood and stared, unseeingly at her belongings; her desk, her chair, her stuff. Then suddenly her legs gave way and she crumpled to the ground, leaning against her bed. It was as if gravity had had been turned off and abruptly returned, giving her back all her lost emotions.

She cried. Whatever had been preventing it from before disappeared and the flood gates opened. Her mind swirled, latching on to the scene that made her heart ache and body tremble.

He left.

He had left. And what's more than that he hadn't said a word to her; He didn't even say goodbye! The knowledge that he had gone off with Rukia was upsetting and she wouldn't lie to herself that that hadn't hurt. But the fact that he didn't say anything to _her; _she just couldn't take it.

They had both been living here with her for the better half of six months and she considered them family, even if they didn't see it that way. True she _felt_ something for him, but that didn't make him any less a part of her family. To be able to live with anyone for that long a timeframe and then say **nothing**; how could he be so heartless.

While she cried a presence came in behind her. He watched for a moment more and then decided enough was enough.

"Woman" He stated.

She turned around with a startled gasp, choking back her tears. Slowly, shakily she got up, standing.

"Grim-Grimmjow" she said. "Uh, what's…up?" she tried, wiping at her eyes. She knew it was a pathetic attempt and before long she lowered her eyes to the floor, not wanting to see him.

They stood feet apart for some time and neither said a word. Finally she couldn't take the silence.

"Say something." She said then lifted her eyes once more. He stood unmoving, just staring.

"He's gone." She said. "I bet you knew that already…" she inhaled shakily, as more tears sprang forth and fell.

Another moment passed. "Do _something_" she said."Just please, don't stand there and—"

It was then, Grimmjow strolled forward and taking one hand from its place in his pocket, leaned down and kissed her, his hand on her shoulder, silencing her. Suzu's eyes widened and she went rigid in place. After a minute he released her, enabling her to look up at him in astonishment.

She was so confused. However that didn't stop the tears, as moments later she hiccupped and latched her arms around the panther, crying into him.

Now it was the Sexta's turn to be uncomfortable, as he stiffened not because of her grasp but her near constant stream of tears. He hated that and told her so.

"Stop crying; it's annoying."

She sniffled but released him, albeit reluctant. Now her eyes were red and puffy. Grimmjow sneered and then moved in for another kiss, in which she relented. Through their locked lips, he managed to move her down onto the bed. She lay flat on her back as he leaned over her, one hand over her waist resting on the mattress. Once they parted again, he watched as she slowly opened her eyes. She seemed a bit confused how they ended up as they were now. She also looked nervous.

"Grimmjow?" she said, a bit shaky. "I—"not giving her time to protest, he kissed her again, while his immobile hand began to roam. He smoothed over her clothed person, moving until he had successfully unbuttoned her shirt to fondle a breast through her bra. It was then she stopped him, grabbing his hand and pulling away from his kiss.

"Grimmjow" now she looked scared. Her hand shook where she held him. "I—I haven't done this, before…" she didn't meet his eyes, but it was obvious what she was feeling.

He stopped but scoffed. "Che, I know that." When she looked up hastily, he went on.

"If you had, we woulda done this a **long** time ago." He smirked, but she wasn't sure how that was supposed to make her feel. Certainly not better she decided. Regardless he got up so as to remove his jacket and footwear, before coming back to the bed, to lie on top of her.

For some reason instead of feeling frightened as she would have suspected, a flutter of something else went through her. She could feel his muscles on her bared stomach and see the perfection of his torso. She had to admit that what she was seeing she liked and as his hands smoothed over her ribcage, her stomach did a flip.

He brought her up to him, lifting her slightly from the bed to kiss her again and when he laid her back down her shirt was off and she soon discovered he had removed her bra as well. Before she could think to freak and cover it she had encompassed one breast in his mouth. It felt amazing to Suzu, completely marvelous and as she watched him curiously as he sucked, she felt a sudden wetness below. Something about watching him do that to her was surprisingly sexy and when his blue eyes looked up at her it was tantalizing. She had to kiss him, placing her hands on either side of his face. Even with the mask, she didn't care.

He moved down her neck, biting it and licking his way down. He made a repeat performance of suckling a breast while the other hand went lower south. He had reached the button on her pants and swiftly undoing that, he reached inside to cup her warmth.

This startled her and she twitched, unused to this kind of contact. She wasn't sure what to do or how to feel but there was no doubt now that she was turned on; she was far too wet for anything else, embarrassingly. He removed his hand and she looked to him uncertain.

"These" he said "are in the way." He began easing them down, until they came off. She was almost completely naked and now the fear was starting to creep back in.

Grimmjow meanwhile was looking to her door, seeing it partially closed. He narrowed his eyes, remembering the last time they were 'alone' and picking up a sandal flung it at the door, shutting it.

No mongrel was going to interrupt them this time.

When he turned back to the girl she looked downright terrified. His eyes squinted in perception of this as he moved over her, completely dwarfing her and shielding her sight from his hand's movement as he released his strained organ, lowering his hakamas a tad. Then he slid her panties down and staring into her doe eyes, kissed her while his appendage found her opening. He slid in testing it and preparing himself for the tight passage.

All the while Suzu could feel him and her heart raced; it thudded painfully inside her, fear enveloping her in its dark embrace. One of his hands played with her nipple, making her momentarily forget her fear. While at that his mouth moved to the column of her neck.

Figuring he had spared her enough time, in one swift movement he plunged inward, at the same time he bit her neck and his hand grasped her bosom. She made a strangled noise, like a gasp and groan all in one, more tears leaking from her swollen eyes.

It hurt. There was no doubt about that. Even with his attempted distraction she could feel it. She squeezed her eyes closed, and tried to take in some air, but the pain was unavoidable. It was like she was about to be torn asunder. She wished to screamed, clawing at his back.

"Woman" Grimmjow's voice reached past her pain and she opened her eyes meekly. He knew she was hurting and he almost wished he could have been more gentle but what was done was done. Not able to look at her pained expression, he kissed her and the hand on her breast started moving again, lightly caressing her, then switching to the other. After some time, his gentle strokes and kisses began working. The pain became almost bearable.

It was then he moved and taking his time he brought her out of her misery. She began to moan instead of groan and started calling his name, to which he grinned and picked up the pace. Shortly her pain was forgotten entirely and a new sensation took over. It was like a crashing wave inside her and without knowing it she had her first climax, screaming her release. He continued for a while longer till he cursed and tensed, satisfied himself, for the time being he thought.

She lay exhausted and oddly her eyes would not keep from closing, like weights pressed on them. She soon fell asleep, unaware of the panther's eyes still upon her.

Suzu had no idea how long she had been out but without knowing why she awoke with a jerk. Apparently it hadn't been too long since it was still dark outside. She looked beside her but Grimmjow was nowhere to be found. This knowledge made her heart lurch in her chest and she sat up. She could hear something downstairs and thought maybe he was down there. Realizing her state of undress she grabbed a robe from her closet and slipped it on heading downstairs.

She got about half way when she heard a familiar voice followed by another. Rushing down, she found Grimmjow and with a start "Renji!"

He was back! She was happy for a moment but there was sinking feeling she just couldn't shake. The boys saw her but like always were in a standstill. The only difference was Grimmjow was grinning; a fact that Suzu neglected to see.

"Renji!" she began. "You're back! How come—""Suzu what are you wearing?" he said.

She stopped and then blushed; she was in nothing but a thin and most likely see through robe. Of course, what was she thinking?

Before she could try and reason why she was, Renji noted something else and his eyes narrowed, darkening.

"What's that?" his voice was much lower and to Suzu a bit frightening.

She saw where his eyes were glued and remembered; Grimmjow. She slapped her hand over the bruise on her neck. "Renji, we—"

"We had sex." said the Sexta, quite pleased and matter of fact.

Suzu gasped turning to him before turning back to Renji. Her mouth opened and then closed; he was right and she couldn't argue with the truth, her eyes lowering.

Awkward silence descended and then the soul reaper spoke, an edge to his voice unlike before.

"I came back because I was informed I no longer have a duty to perform here. The soul society and its head captain have decreed that the arrancar in question is no longer seen as a potential threat to the human world or to the soul society."

Grimmjow's smirk faltered but Suzu was too stunned to say anything.

"Also I have been ordered to go back to the soul society, as of today, so I will be leaving."

"What!?" Suzu couldn't believe it; he had to go back? But he just got here.

He turned to go but Suzu grabbed his arm, stopping him. "Renji, you can't—"the look he gave her stopped her cold; she had never seen a look like that on his face.

She let go of him and he continued for the door, but she ran after him.

"Please Renji! Don't!" by the time he made it to the door she was right on his heels.

"Renji, I LIKE you!" she yelled, closing her eyes. When she opened them, he was gone.

She stood at the open doorway, her hand clenching over her shattered heart.


	11. Two weeks

Woot! next chappie up already! this time i managed it to be not as uber long in length but even so it is a good length i think.

i did find it funny on the last chapter the reviews i got for it. i had three differing points of view on what happened and i thought it was great because while i do have my own take on it, i did understand how they could see it as they had. it was interesting and at the very least i did not recieve any hate mail per se, so i count that as a win! -Smile-

anyways, hope everyone had a great Christmas and that you all have a great New Year's as well. Now on with the show!

12/21/09

Suzu stood frozen at the door, her heart was clenching painfully in her chest. Nearby Grimmjow watched unfazed and uncaring. He was glad to be rid of the Shinigami, he hoped forever. He didn't understand why she was so fixated on that guy but now it was over, he had won. Or so he thought.

Suzu had other ideas.

She whipped around suddenly and before Grimmjow could say anything clever, she shouted at him.

"Why did you do that!?" she was enflamed.

"Why!?" she repeated. He said nothing but as Suzu's mind whirled it was quite obvious why he had told. He was jealous.

And anyway, if he hadn't told Renji the truth wouldn't she? Or was she that _bad_? Had she really become such a horrible person?

Nevertheless that didn't quell the angry flame that had been ignited, spurred on by the indifferent look the panther was giving her.

"I **HATE **YOU!" she yelled even louder. "And I don't _ever_ want to see you again!" After that she turned and stormed out the open door, not bothering to close it or to retrieve her shoes or even beyond that a sensible outfit.

Suzu had no idea where she going but she was so pissed and ultimately upset that she didn't care. She just kept walking. Her mind swirled with everything that had happened in the past few hours.

How did everything go so wrong?

Consumed by her thoughts and the endless tirade of self abuse, she soon stopped, taking a look at her surroundings. She didn't know where she was, nothing seemed familiar and the darkness wasn't helping either.

One thing she did know was that it was beginning to get very cold; her thin robe did little to shield her from the sudden lash of wind. Glancing around, she spotted a bench. While not an excellent source of protection it was at least somewhere to sit, and gather her wits to try and figure out where she was.

She sat shivering trying to focus on her surroundings and not the cold, so she could find her way home but that gave her pause.

Home… Did she really want to go back there, in particularly back to him, especially so soon after her blowup on the Sexta? More than that, her pride argued against the idea vehemently.

So rather than doing the reasonable, non-stupid thing, she sat in the cold just her and what remained of her damaged dignity.

Fortunately for the girl a familiar face appeared, however a near perpetual scowl accompanied it as he looked on Suzu who had fallen asleep. Suzu was unable to keep her energy up and therefore had fallen prey to the elements and her weariness from before.

"Che, dumbass" the Sexta glowered, pissed that he had had to follow the girl and it would seem now save her from her stupid mistake.

He watched her shiver for a bit, taking in her scantily clad exterior. Her skin was blotched and her lips were a slight blue tint. Her feet as well were rapidly changing colors; he figured it wouldn't have taken much more for her to have succumbed to nature, though it was probably only in the higher forties. _Stupid girl_ he thought.

Without much effort he hefted her up to his chest and placing one arm under her legs and the other under her shoulders walked back the direction he came.

When they got home he carried her to her room, by then she began to stir in his arms, slowly waking. He placed her in bed, covering her when she spoke.

"The last time I woke up like this you weren't here." There was a hint of something like sadness in her voice. He said nothing but watched her, curious.

"Renji's gone" she said "Maybe forever."

She paused then whispered "Most likely…" She couldn't think of a single reason why he would want to come back or should. She had hurt him somehow, and that was unforgivable.

Soon enough tears filled her eyes; another person she cared about was gone and once again it was her fault. She turned her watery gaze upon the Sexta.

"Are you going to leave too?"

Grimmjow had been stewing, mad that her thoughts again were occupied by that Shinigami but hearing that he laughed. Was she stupid?

Suzu however was still upset and hearing him laugh at her didn't help. Was that her answer?

"Are you serious?" he said finally. Still she cried so he made it more clear by getting in bed with her. He lay on top of her, staring at her intensely before saying "What do you think?"

She cried again, but this time for happier reasons. The thought of once again being completely alone had terrified her. She didn't think she had it in her to do that; not now. But Grimmjow would stay, even if for his own agenda. It would be enough.

She snuggled into him as best she could from her position and shortly she was asleep.

Two weeks later

After the fiasco of a couple weeks prior, Suzu moped around the house and generally did little to nothing, hardly leaving the house or her couch. She also fended off the vigorous advances of the espada. It was like just because he had sex in his rank it was all he thought about, or so it seemed.

She was sitting in her usual place on the couch, watching TV when she sighed. She was tired of being this way and needed to get out. There was no sign of the sex crazed panther, so quietly she left, deciding to go for a walk. Maybe fresh air would do some good.

She walked around not entirely sure where she was headed. Nevertheless it was nice to be out. Soon she found herself in Taki's neighborhood and without thought she was on her doorstep, ringing the bell.

"Ah, Suzu-san, long time no see." said Taki, smiling happily.

Tama appeared behind her, wagging excitedly.

"I think he remembers you."

"Does he? Heh." Suzu bent down to pet Tama, who seemed to love every minute of it.

"So what brings you?" Taki asked "You seem kind of out of it. Is something wrong?"

"Well, actually…"

After she told Taki the whole ordeal, glazing over the more intimate details, she sat back in her chair exhausted yet somewhat relieved to have been able to tell someone.

"So you liked this guy but he blew you off for his childhood friend and then you slept with his roommate while he was gone?" she said, a little loftiness to her voice. Obviously she hadn't told the _complete_ truth.

"Well, yeah, that's basically how it worked…" she said, though hearing it put _that_ way did make her cringe at how slutty and fickle she sounded.

Still she supposed if she had told the real story it would still be just as bad if not worse.

"Well I can't say that I necessarily approve of what you did." To this Suzu bowed her head, in shame and disgust.

"However, if you told the guy how you felt and he left then maybe he wasn't the guy for you to begin with." Suzu's heart clenched, but she could certainly understand the reasoning. Hadn't she known from the beginning that he was in love with Rukia? And yet she still shoved her feelings onto him, as if trying to negate this fact.

Taki watched her newfound friend as she struggled with her emotions. She kind of felt bad, even if it was her honest opinion.

"Though I could be wrong" she back peddled "I mean he could just take some time to get over what happened. You **did** sleep with his roomie." She said this in a motherly I-do-not-approve kind of way.

"Maybe…" Suzu replied blandly, though in her heart she didn't dare hope for that to be possible. She knew she had hurt him and that would be hard to fix.

Still she knew as well that Taki was only trying to make her feel better and she appreciated her for that. After that they talked for a while more, nothing as serious, just small talk, day to day stuff. A couple hours had passed Suzu realized and so she decided she should leave.

Hugging her goodbye at the door, she waved and went on her way. She thought about going to Ichigo's house but was stopped on the way by Grimmjow as he seemingly appeared out of nowhere.

"Grimmjow" she was not expecting to see him. "Are you done terrorizing the townsfolk?" she said with a grin. He stared at her, not finding the humor in her jab. Instead he asked a question of his own.

"Where are you going?" he gauged her reaction as she twitched in response, before replying "nowhere".

She couldn't very well tell him her actual intent was to see Ichigo; he'd just go fight him. Rather than that, she gave some thought before coming up with what she figured was the least likely place he'd want to go.

"If you have to know, I was going to go to the supermarket. I haven't been out of the house for a while and I'm kinda running low on supplies. Ya know _food_?"

In truth she really was running low and so were Shiro and Kuroh. Unfortunately for her, Grimmjow stared a minute more before relenting, saying he would go too.

Stuck she almost gave up, but another idea came to mind and the pair were off, heading to Urahara's.

"Hell no" Grimmjow said, face his usual angry norm. What the hell was she trying to pull?

"But Grimmjow" she pleaded, in mock sincerity "If you don't do it, you won't be able to come with me." Yes she thought; he would **never **do this.

"I said I'm not wearing that!" he said pointing to the gigai in question as it lay sprawled on the ground where he had dropped it.

She made a show of looking downtrodden, but in reality she couldn't be more thrilled. So reluctantly she said "Alright, if that's how you feel, I guess I'll be going. I'll see you back at home."

She was just on her way out, thanking Urahara when the panther spoke up.

"Fine" he said, grabbing the fallen replica. "But you **owe** me woman."

To say she was shocked was an understatement, but regardless they made it to the store, her mood soured.

As soon as they walked in people began staring, men and women alike. She supposed even like this he would be strange. He still had his bright blue hair and eyes, but where his mask would have been there was smooth skin. Likewise his hollow hole was now gone and a belly button never before seen was obvious through his open shirt. He was still himself however as he glared hatefully at everyone who passed.

She looked around sheepishly, apologizing to bystanders then told Grimmjow discreetly to behave himself and not hurt anyone to which he scoffed but said nothing else.

It was then she heard some of the whispers and odd looks; mostly from females.

"Is she with him?" they queried or "Wow he's hot! I doubt they're together…" even going so far as coming up to him, nearly knocking her down in the process as they rushed passed her.

She huffed and walked off, leaving him to the swarm of girls.

She searched for her items, trying to push him out of her mind. After all this is what she wanted, to be left alone. She gathered her items in her basket, while the Sexta followed her, being tailed himself by obsessed girls. She ignored their squeals and cat calls as best she could, not hearing a familiar voice as it called out to her.

"Suzu! HEY!"

Someone patted her on the shoulder. Suzu thinking it was the panther was ready to unleash hell, but turning she found Taki instead. "Oh" she said "Taki, sorry about that."

"What's up? You look like you could kill somebody." Suzu sighed and was about to tell her but just then another girl came up.

"Who the hell's that?" she said. Suzu turned and saw her line of fire, directly on Grimmjow and his mob of fans.

"Oh, _him_" she said. Taki seeing her face and the irritation there guessed out loud.

"That's the guy, the one you slept with right?" Suzu nodded her head.

"Ah" said Taki. Then leaning in she whispered "nice" making Suzu blush unintentionally. The girl from before was still watching him, but she appeared just as disgusted as Suzu.

"Oh, this is my cousin, Kizoku." said Taki.

Suzu took in her appearance, wearing a tank top and jeans that had been cut off on one leg. Her posture seemed angry, her blues eyes popping from her black hair, similar in style to Taki's minus a streak or two of color.

Overall at first glance Suzu would have thought her to be a Yanki, as if at any minute her gang would be there to back her up.

"He looks like a punk to me." Said Kizoku, her eyes narrowed and arms folded. For some reason Suzu found herself just a bit intimidated; she made Grimmjow look like a kitten in Suzu's eyes.

Then she turned to Suzu, who flinched.

"Hey, I'm Kizoku" she said extending her hand politely. Suzu shook it introducing herself. "Pleased to meet you" Suzu said. Maybe she had gotten her wrong…

"Anyway, we have to be going, but take care of yourself."

"Don't hurt anybody" said Taki, a smile on her face. They left and Suzu turned back around to see the mob still hadn't disbanded; Grimmjow stood staring at something else, but didn't seemed fazed by all the attention he was receiving.

Suzu made a growling noise and turned away, a sudden feeling like jealousy churning inside her.

Grimmjow had been distracted by something on the shelf and lost sight of Suzu for just a moment; by then all the girls following him caught up. He was really getting annoyed by them but didn't know what to do, short of killing them. Suzu had told him to behave but damn between the fake body he was still getting used to and the women, he was about to blow a fuse.

He finally spotted her down the aisle but she turned and walked off. Nearly growling himself, he went to try and find her but a pair of girls blocked his path.

"Can we have your number?" one said, then the other "You're hot and we think it's just a _shame_ you're here alone."

He stared at them; he couldn't take it anymore. So tact be damned he replied "Beat it." then started walking off. Still they persisted "Aww, don't be like that!"

"We know how to have some fun." They tried suggestively but he glared at them angrily "I said get lost, I'm not into skanks."

He left and heard their parting remarks but didn't care. He was trying to find Suzu but with this gigai he had a hard time sensing reiatsu. "Damn" he cursed, then turned down an aisle.

Suzu was muttering to herself, still searching through the aisles. She couldn't believe all the attention he was getting.

She scoffed out loud, "If they knew he was a murderous arrancar I bet they wouldn't be so forward or so willing to 'show him a good time'" she said. Really who honestly uses that line anymore?

She was so pissed she didn't pay attention to where she was going or more specifically to whom she was running into as she hit something. The harsh impact made her step backwards as she regained footing.

"Oww" she said and then was going to apologize as she looked up to see a hulk of a man and what appeared to be his crew with him. He was a rough and shady character if ever she saw one; he looked like he had been in a few fights in his time and won all of them.

"Oi girlie" he started, staring down at her. "What's that all about? You better apologize for bumping into me like that."

If that was a bump then what Suzu received was a body check. Still she was too preoccupied, envisioning scenarios of him and his gang as they raped and pillaged like ye old pirates. She may have gotten that part wrong a bit…

"Girlie I'm talking to you" here he bent down so he was eye level (more or less) with Suzu. "Ehh?" he said, then smiling horribly he had another thought. Grabbing her chin forcefully in his massive calloused hand, he yanked hard up so she had to stare at him, whether she wanted to or not.

"My, ain't you a pretty little thing." Again he smiled (at least showed his lack of teeth) and leaned in even more. "What you say to coming home with me, eh girlie?" here his cohorts chuckled, as if they knew what was going to take place later if he succeeded here.

Whether it be because she knew not her limitations or because she didn't think of the consequences, Suzu opened her mouth and replied "Tic Tacs are on aisle three; I suggest you invest in some."

Most likely it was because she was already pissed and naïve enough to not see what was coming next. For after her utterance the brute's eyes widened, jaw tightened and he bellowed "WHAT WAS THAT!?"

Adding emphasis he squeezed tightly on her jaw and jerking it upwards said "You're gonna regret that."

"You obviously don't know what regret means." From behind, the group of men turned and standing before them was the espada, pissed off.

"Ha! And why would that be?" he said, still gripping Suzu like a vice. Grimmjow strode forward, but Tic Tacs men stood in his way. They seemed to think they had an advantage, but Grimmjow was not intimidated nor backing down. After a minute or two Tic Tacs told them to move; **he** wanted to face this guy. So they did and the panther remained where he was.

"Well" he said "Come on then, show me some regret." After this he laughed, clearly not seeing the danger. He walked forward a few more feet, now close enough he was an arm's length from Suzu and the brute.

He stopped laughing and noted his now close proximity yet still didn't appear fazed, continuing to mock.

"What?" he said "You wanna dance or somethin'?" he smiled and Grimmjow said nada. After a while his humor disappeared. "I'm gettin' bored now. Why don't ya try hitting me; that could be fun."

Grimmjow was silent but then replied "I'm not going to have to hit you to beat you." He smiled and said "That would be overkill."

Now Tic Tacs was the pissed off one, "You think so!? Then how about this!" he lashed out with his right hand, aiming to do some damage but was easily caught as Grimmjow clasped his right hand over the guy's, effectively stopping him. When Tic Tacs realized this, his expression shifted to shock, loosening his hold on Suzu who got out of his tight hold, backing up.

Grimmjow grinned sadistic and began applying his own pressure, making the guy grunt, before twisting it, not enough to break it but enough to hurt and let the idiot know he had no hope of overpowering him.

"Alright!" he screamed "Enough!" Grimmjow let him go, and just as quickly as the fight started it ended, with the gang running off, ashamed but alive.

Suzu could only stare in awe, a slight feeling of something akin to pride swelled in her. Grimmjow had watched them run off, face back to normal. His eyes landed on Suzu, though he didn't say anything, then just as quickly he was walking away.

Suzu called out to him, but he said "I'll be outside woman." And he left. She stood for a bit more, confused, not only with him but with herself. Finally, she broke her trance and went to check out.

When she came outside she found him, almost not recognizing him from behind; the gigai was different. He saw her and they went back to Urahara's to drop off the gigai.

She was quiet on the walk back home; her mind was filled with events both fresh and old.

At home she put the groceries away, and gave the animals a treat while Grimmjow slouched on the couch. When she was done, she went over to Grimmjow, blocking the TV so he would listen to her.

"Grimmjow" she said, then she stopped; she didn't know what she wanted to tell him. Thank you, among other things.

Finally she decided on "You don't have to wear the gigai anymore." He seemed interested and the look he gave her told her so, as she went on.

"You were really good today. That is to say, you did what I asked of you." She looked down reminiscent.

"That guy, you could have killed that guy and his friends!" she added, as if this was something he wasn't already aware. "But you didn't" she said "You held back."

"I'm glad you did." He che'd and said "Yah, and now it's time for you to return the favor."

"Say what?" she didn't remember this.

"I told you when I put that thing on that you owe me, now I think it's time you pay up." He said this and got up, a gleam in his eye.

"Y-yah, but" she walked backwards, scrapping passed the sofa. "I mean, I just told you you wouldn't have to wear the gigai again. Isn't that repayment?" she said still backing "I mean that's what you wanted."

He continued to advance "Yah, but now I'm thinking I want something else." It was clear what this something else was and before long he had her cornered. Grabbing her he kissed her with much gusto, his hands around her. Her protest was quelled before it could even get off the ground as she kissed him back.

Soon his hands were groping and fervent. Picking her up, he carried her to the bedroom wherein divulging their clothes he devoured her, hungrily claiming his reward.

She didn't resist or even want to really. After all he had a point; he had been a good boy.

In the soul society a certain someone was readying to depart for the human world. All the preparations had been made and everyone who cared had said their goodbyes.

It had been two weeks and truthfully, as much as it surprised him, he missed it and a certain somebody in particular.

Nearing the senkai gate, he gulped what nervousness he felt down and steeled his resolve. Soon enough he would be back and that was what he wanted.

Still he knew it would be a struggle; there were still issues that needed to be worked out and he would have to explain himself. Nevertheless, he was prepared and as the doors opened he walked in without hesitation.

_Soon _Renji thought.


	12. Stressful situations

Alrighty chapter 12! not a whole lot to say here, just that it's getting good (or at least i hope for those reading). Not much going on but the lastest episode of Bleach was awesome and i have recently heard from what i consider a reputable source that after this arch in the manga there will be two not one but two more archs after it! one is going to be short the other longer. this made me immensely happy, let me tell ya. -Smile-

Also i have a picture for this story, made by a friend of mine (who is freakin' Awesome!) i put it on my DA since she didn't upload it to hers. here's the link .com/art/Love-triangle-149403514 Take a gander and tell me what ya think!

I do not own Renji or Grimmjow (stab me in the heart will ya) nor do i take credit for the Snow Patrol song On/Off featured herein. Enjoy!

Oh and i was thinking about this but i am curious; who do you like Renji or Grimmjow? or both. whatever you choose will NOT affect the story, i just wanna know.

12/28/09

Suzu woke up not long after she had fallen asleep. She felt icky from their amorous activities and from the sweltering heat of the panther as he nearly smothered her with his body. Squirming she managed to free herself and though her body protested against the movement she went to the bathroom for a much needed shower.

Normally she loved taking hot showers but given the circumstances this time she made it lukewarm; she would never be able to take a cold shower she decided. She hated the cold far too much.

Her mind began to drift as she stood there letting the water assail her body. A melody came to the forefront making her hum. Ironically for someone who loved music as she did, the shower was the one place she never sang.

After some time, she turned off the water and stepped out of the tub. Debating on sneaking back into her room, she instead went to the hamper in the laundry room. There were some clothes that had yet to be washed, so she slipped into an outfit and went downstairs. She turned on the TV but quickly found she was uninterested, turning it back off to go outside.

It was still light out but in another couple hours it would be gone. She sat outside against the wall, staring up into the sky. The last time she watched the sun like this, she was with Renji. It seemed like so long ago in her mind.

She sighed; really, she was indulging thoughts she needn't be having. He was gone after all. Still, she wished she could say something to him, apologize though that was highly unlikely.

'_I couldn't believe what I was seeing  
Faces all screwed up like what I'd done.  
I didn't mean to hurt you so much  
I knew it would hurt you but not like this.  
We all make a mess from time to time dear  
but it'll take me a lifetime to get this cleared.  
Somebody muttered something under their breath  
but I let on like I was a little deaf._'

The song from her shower came back to her, as she silently sang, alone.

'_Nobody's perfect that's what I say  
No one has hurt me so much you say  
I'm sorry.'_

Sorry, she wished she could tell him that…but to what good would that do?

'_Running away seemed like the easy  
Thing to do because I wanted time  
to put a smile back on my dour face  
For once nothing's missing and I feel fine.  
I was afraid to tell you some things  
but some things all find a way to get told.  
Hearing it from the lips of somebody else  
must have knocked the wind out of your sweet chest._

_Nobody's perfect that's what I say  
No one has hurt me so much you say  
I'm sorry.'_

She stared into the darkening sky standing, a heavy sigh in her chest. She whispered the last line again before she turned for the door.

"Yo!" stopping short, she almost thought she was imagining things.

_I could have sworn that was_ –"Renji!" she said turning. It really was him! That or she was further gone than previously speculated.

"Renji…" she said again uncertain. "What are you—doing here?"

"Yeah, apparently as it turns out, they didn't need me as badly as they thought." This was partially the truth but there was more to it. "So they said I could come back."

"I will still have to go back from time to time and in the event of any emergencies in the soul society, but otherwise I'll be here."

Suzu had nothing to say in return; she was still in shellshock, wary to touch him even for fear he would vanish underneath her fingertips. She stood gawking a while longer before he suggested they go inside, as it was getting dark. She managed a head nod and they went inside.

Immediately a sense of familiarity washed over Renji and within moments he was at ease, rummaging around for some food. Seeing him like that, in her house again, it was as if he never left. Back to how it should be; however…

"Renji" she said softly; she had to apologize. He stopped scrounging long enough to see her, her eyes downcast and hands clasped together in front of her. He walked over and stopped in front of her, waiting.

"Renji, I know this probably means little to nothing now, but I feel like I should apologize. What happened was…bad." She didn't know how else to put it.

"I didn't mean for it to happen…oh, but that sounds lame like I'm making excuses…" she faltered, brows wrinkled contemplative. She looked up at him.

"I'm sorry."

The look on her face, it was like she had just been punched in the stomach. He knew she tried really hard to explain, but it was unnecessary.

"I know." He said, making her eyes go wide. In truth he had heard her singing outside. He had opened the senkai gate just atop her roof and listened, hearing her regret. Even so, just to look at her now he would've known the truth.

At that moment the animals appeared, one right after the other, investigating the soul reaper. It may have only been two weeks but the way they swarmed him was like it had been years.

Suzu giggled watching as he tried to combat the duo, unsuccessfully. "They missed you too."

"Suzu" he began, watching as she helped shoo the pests from him. She looked up, inquisitive and he proceeded.

"About the night I left." She appeared hesitant but didn't back away.

"When you said you liked me… the truth is—""Renji, you don't have to say anymore." She interrupted.

"I— understand…perfectly how you feel." to this her eyes were down, fist clenched to her chest just as she had been that night. She appeared to be in pain.

"I'm sorry for pushing my feelings onto you like that, so please, let's forget that it ever happened."

"Suzu-"he tried to fix the situation, stepping closer to her but she backed away, palms out. He stopped and lowering her hand, her gaze downcast "Night Renji."

She ran upstairs before he could say anymore, leaving the Shinigami puzzled to his thoughts.

The next morning Suzu woke up alone in her bed. Realizing badness ensued the last time she woke up like this and feeling the heated reiatsu from downstairs, she quickly rubbed the sleep from her and ran down to them.

She found them like usual but along with the normal standoffish behavior there was a heavy undercurrent of tension. Unlike times before where they seemed not to notice her presence until she was right on top of them, they watched her come down, which made Suzu just a bit more than uneasy.

"H-hey" she said unsure as both men eyed her, one smug the other unconfident yet angry. She stopped once she cleared the stairs, still a safe distance from them. "Uh, so…"

"Who wants breakfast?"

Having retrieved her kotatsu from the closet and setting it on the far right side of the living room, the three sat down albeit awkwardly together. She had managed to put together a meal, simple but good enough (at least for her tastes) and had made a fair share for each, just like herself.

This was the first time that all three of them had actually sat down together at the table and she would admit it was different. It kinda felt nice really.

After a time however, she began to regret this decision; being in close quarters with the boys made her feel weird. Add to that the fact that neither had said a word, just glared and sneered, it was a wonder nobody had died yet, or in her case ran screaming from the room. It was so thick with tension and amped reiatsu she was almost suffocating.

So far neither one had touched the food, though realistically she never saw Grimmjow eat ever. Did he even require food for that matter? Just then her stomach gurgled, signaling that she needed nourishment even if he didn't. She helped herself, avoiding the piercing stares they threw over her.

"Yum! This is good!" she said taking a bite; she was trying to alleviate the mood but all she succeeded in achieving was an angry look from the espada and not much else. She sighed, _well at least I tried_.

Just then a rogue appendage strayed from its owner to grope her thigh under the table. She jumped hitting her knee in the process.

"OWW!" she said rubbing the spot with her hand. Meanwhile the hand on her thigh continued its trek as if nothing happened.

"Grimmjow" she griped, turning to the culprit "Knock it off!"

He gave her a look, unconcerned "Why should I?"

"Because you're a perv and this is not the time!" she huffed, glaring. "I don't appreciate it."

He stared for a moment "And?" he said. Not deterred by this his hand remained where it was. "Like I care"

"I **know** you like it." as he said this he leaned toward her, making her lean back to escape him.

While all this went on Renji sat invisible to them, though pissed off beyond reason. His fist was clenched in his lap, his expression hardened before lashing out "Stop it goddamn it!"

"Oh, what's that Shinigami? You have a problem?" said Grimmjow; at least for the moment he was distracted though that wasn't necessarily better. Renji eyed the espada, his eyes on fire.

"She said stop. Knock it the hell off."

"Che, like I'm going to listen to you. Why don't you go back where you came from? You aren't needed here" Suzu watched the two bicker as they got more and more animated. Before long they were at each other's throats, leaning over the table, inches apart.

Why did they have to be idiots?

Suzu's stomach began to clench, probably from her lack of food. However it felt a bit different.

She sighed watching them, not even bothering to get involved. "I'm sick of this" she said, though that turned out to be much more accurate than she wanted when her stomach lurched painfully, the acids and bile rising.

Now with grim certainty "I think I really am gonna be sick!" she said standing and quite literally running from the room. She reached the bathroom and heaving emptied what food she had consumed.

"Ugh, so gross" she said sat next to the toilet, wiping her mouth with a towel. It was like this the boys found her, having apparently decided to put the fight on hold, at least for now.

Suzu didn't really know why she had gotten sick; maybe she had waited too long to eat. Nevertheless she was sick and there was little she could do about that. Standing, she took a disgusted glance into the toilet and flushing left, walking past the blockade of boys. Neither said anything, but they followed her back downstairs, watching as she looked to the food still plentiful on the table.

She felt bad about wasting it so instead she wrapped it up and put everything in the fridge hoping that later she would be better enough to eat it. After that she sat on the couch, turning on the tube, trying to relax. Of course two angry boys made that a little difficult.

They stood nearby giving each other an angry stare, as if blaming the other for her being sick. _Idiots_ she thought before laying down, immersing herself in the TV.

She wasn't down for long, having woken from a doze to the pangs of her belly. Getting up she went to the bathroom for round two in her regurgitation trick. She knew she had nothing left on her stomach because all that came up was bile, which to Suzu was the worst part about getting sick.

She still felt tired so she went to her bedroom to lie down. However her stomach was still achy and uncooperative making sleep difficult. She lay there for a while just staring up at the ceiling, absently rubbing her stomach. She didn't notice Grimmjow standing in the doorway.

"What are you doing?" he questioned approaching the prone girl as she noticed him.

"Trying to sleep" she said "My stomach hurts though." She returned to staring at the ceiling, still rubbing.

He watched her with an unreadable gaze, then stepping forward he reached his hand out to her. Lifting her shirt up, Suzu shrieked in protest. "Stop Grimmjow; I don't feel well!" obviously thinking the worst.

He didn't stop, placing his other hand upon her stomach. She jerked, trying to move away or shoo him off "Grimmjow, please; this is not the time to—"she stopped short, watching in amazement as he made smooth circular movements over her belly, quelling her quaking insides.

"Oh" her hand fell away to the side and she lay back. She observed him for a bit then shut her eyes. Grimmjow saw this and stopped his movements, scoffing. He turned to leave but her hand caught him.

"Wait, I didn't say to stop" she said, then smiled up to him.

Under other circumstances the Sexta would have loved to hear those words come from her mouth but this, this was just annoying.

Still he complied, moving to the bed arranging it so the girl's head rested on his thigh, while his back was to her wall. He continued his ministrations to her sore belly and in moments she was finally asleep.

Renji returned from a visit with the carrot top; he got some helpful advice on what to do when someone was sick. He ransacked the kitchen and went through the cupboards, trying to find what he needed.

A while later he had more or less finished his task and went upstairs to find Suzu. It may not have come out exactly the best, but given he had never cooked anything much before he was relatively pleased with the results.

"Hey" he said approaching "I have something, in case you're hungry-"stopping midstride, he stared unhappily at the scene before him; Grimmjow still on the bed smirked hatefully at the Shinigami as he took in the sight of Suzu resting peacefully against the panther; she didn't even stir.

He narrowed his eyes at the smug espada and then turned on his heel.

Later Suzu woke up and avoiding the panther's less than nurturing ways managed to get downstairs, finding a mess in the kitchen and a sullen Shinigami on the couch. Renji heard her and met her by the counter as she made sense of the mess.

"What is all this?" she queried lifting a pot, sniffing its contents. It smelled vaguely familiar.

"Ah, yah that was supposed to be for you. I made okayu, though it's not exactly perfect…" the way he looked was so cute, he was definitely out of his element with this. Still he tried and really wasn't it the thought that counted?

"Aw, Renji" she cooed "That's sweet. Thank you." She turned back to the now cold mush with a look of fondness failing to see the bright tint of the soul reaper's cheeks.

"Anyway, it's no good anymore."

"That's okay, we can just make some more!" she said cheerfully. "I can help this time."

"O-okay."

While they were busy in the kitchen Grimmjow fumed, clearly not enjoying this turnabout. If the Shinigami thought he had won he was sadly mistaken.

He would see; Grimmjow would make his life hell for even dreaming he had a shot with her.


	13. You're Going Down!

Wow, it seems like this has taken me a while to write but in reality it hasn't been that long...it weird how i always think that when it never ends up being the case. guilty conscience much? heh

Anywho, i'm sure i've forgotten what all i wanted to say here so i guess i'll just let you enjoy the chapter.

I do not own Repo! The Genetic Opera or any of its songs i may have used, nor the awesome song by the Sick Puppies that inspired the title. i think that song is Perfect for these idiots (cough cough Renji cough Grimmjow cough cough) and though i didn't put the song in here i wanted to, so maybe later sometime.

heads up, chapter 14 will be awesome and may blow some minds(possibly)... eh, i know i'm going to enjoy writing it! -Smile-

1/11/10

The next day Suzu had recovered from her mystery illness and felt better, however the boys were still at it. In fact if she didn't know better she would think that Grimmjow had it out for the Shinigami for it seemed he was the one starting most of the fighting.

There was no proof, however seeing Renji come down the stairs Suzu watched as at the last minute Grimmjow stuck out a foot, tripping the unawares red head as the panther smirked in delight.

It was just a hunch, really…

Fortunately the Shinigami's reflexes kicked in, allowing him to land relatively smoothly. He glared up at the panther as his good mood soured seeing him unharmed. Suzu witnessing this latched herself to Renji's side.

"Renji are you alright? That was some fall" she said fawning over him while eyeing the panther from her peripherals. Renji's face lit up brightly at her sudden touches and concern for him.

"Uh, yah, I'm good." He turned to go, while Suzu stuck her tongue out at the enraged espada. If he was going to be a jerk then she could do it too.

"Ass" she said and then turned to follow Renji only to be stopped by the Sexta as he sonidoed in front of her. He glared down at her "What was that?" he said.

She glared right back at him "My tongue" she said "I stuck it out at you for being a jerkwad." Met with only silence she continued her tirade.

"Why do you have to be so mean to him? What's your problem?" if she were more girly she would have put her hands on her hips at this point. It didn't matter however; he wasn't paying attention.

All her yelling was having the opposite effect on the arrancar, all he could think about was that pink tongue and devouring her mouth with his.

"Hey, are you even listening?" she fumed.

"Do it again" he said leaning down to her level, making her back stiffen.

"Wha—do what again?" she asked uncertain if she wanted to know.

He leaned closer "Stick out your tongue." He had a gleam in his eyes. Now she knew it was a trap.

"N-no, I don't want to…" she stammered backing up. He advanced, undeterred.

"Grimmjow, don't- mmph" he smothered her mouth with his own, his tongue entering to swirl with hers as they kissed. When he got a little handsy she pushed him back, recovering her air.

"Grimmjow, stop." She said firm. She wasn't about to let him win using dirty tactics, especially with Renji nearby.

"Woman" he said getting irritated. He started closing what little distance had been created when a hand landed on his shoulder, stilling him.

"Stop it." Renji was behind him and appeared upset. Naturally the Sexta smacked his hand off, turning around to face him. He had a look on his face that said 'why should I?'

"If she tells you to stop then that's what you do." Renji had stayed out of it for as long as he could but it had gotten too much to ignore. The arrancar was pushing his buttons and he was getting tired of it.

"What's it to you, Shinigami? Interfering in someone else's affairs." He glared at Renji clearly annoyed to have been interrupted. However just as quickly his smirk returned, amused.

"Anyway, it's none of your damn business!" he stated plainly, reiatsu rising in challenge. "It's not your responsibility anymore, so fuck off."

Grimmjow likewise was pissed off with the Shinigami and how he always managed to get in the Sexta's way, especially lately with Suzu. Well whatever, the soul reaper would lose this fight, Grimmjow would make sure of that.

Renji sensed the increase in reiatsu and raised his in response. "Even without being ordered to, I'll _still_ stop you." He would accept the challenge.

"Let's see you **try** it." Grimmjow sneered upping his reiatsu further. They were feet apart, staring each other down, powers flaring to the surface.

Meanwhile Suzu stood behind them a little confused what was going on. Sure she had seen them like this plenty times but this time the fight was about her. That thought registered oddly with her, unsure what to make of their behavior.

Nevertheless she figured stopping them was the correct protocol.

She called out to them "Hey, guys cut it out!" When they appeared not to notice she tried again louder.

"Morons! Knock it off!" Even insulting them was met with little resistance; they continued posturing, ignoring Suzu and the atmosphere was becoming more heavy.

Growing frustrated Suzu tired one more time, walking towards them hand outstretched, yelling "HEY, listen to me you—"She stopped abruptly, her heartbeat skipped a bit erratic. Confused she placed her hand where her heart lay, feeling it thrum deeply. Suddenly she felt dizzy, backing up to grab hold of the banister, trying to keep her unsteady legs beneath her.

The air seemed thick around her making it difficult to breathe. Her vision swam, clouding her sight of the boys.

"Hey" she tried weakly "Stop" before blackness took hold and she passed out falling to the floor with a thud.

A minute later she came to with Renji beside her, hovering and Grimmjow behind him annoyed. She blinked a couple times and then tried sitting up though she was still a bit woozy. "Suzu" Renji said voice laced with worry "You okay?"

"Yah…I think so." She stood up as Renji supported her. She was a bit shaky but not nearly as much as before. "What happened?" the soul reaper asked.

"I don't really know. I suddenly felt dizzy and then nothing." She looked to the guys "I guess I passed out." She saw the concerned gaze of the red head and reassured him.

"Oh, but I feel fine now." As nice as his concern was she didn't want him to worry.

Passing out sucked but at least they had stopped fighting…

"Hey, Shinigami" getting his attention, Renji turned and Grimmjow hauled off and punched him in the face.

_Never mind_ she thought.

Renji was rightly angry "What the hell was that for!" he yelled. Grimmjow only gave him a cold glare.

The Sexta had gotten a little too fed up with Renji touching her, even if it was to check and see she was okay, so he punched him; hard. He stared at the pissed off Shinigami, quite happy with himself.

"You bastard!" the red head said, preparing his fist, only to be dodged by the espada. Thus the fight continued, like it had never been stopped. With it came a sick feeling in Suzu's stomach, much like what happened the other day at the table.

_Their fighting is making me sick?_ She thought. _That's probably why I passed out too!_

This realization though nice was unhelpful as it didn't solve their fighting. However she did have an idea what might. Quickly she ran up the stairs, tripping in her haste and retrieved her laptop. As she came back down they were still at it so whistling she got their attention.

"Yo, idjits!" She said pleased by their response. She motioned for them to gather round as she played some music from her YouTube page. She thought maybe it would be able to calm them down; after all didn't the saying go that music tamed the savage beast?

Unfortunately these 'beasts' were too savage and Suzu's music choices were poor, very unfitting for the situation at hand. Suzu sighed as they once more took up their fight, yelling and punching.

She sat dejectedly on the couch, her stomach once more doing unpleasant summersaults and her head throbbing when Kuroh and Shiro came over to her, one at her feet the other on her lap as if for comfort. She looked to them fondly, a small smile on her face.

She stroked Kuroh's fur while he purred and another thought came to mind. Springing up with Kuroh she went to the embattled pair, Shiro at her heels and shoved the cat in the red head's face, forcing him to stop mid lunge to stare at the creature as it eyed him back.

"Kitty! Cute!" she said, more her opinion really than his. The cat continued to stare, unnerving the Shinigami with its bright eyes.

"Hey, woman! What the hell are you—"Grimmjow was halted by the sudden panting close by, as Shiro sat by him, watching him. He growled at it, not liking its proximity but it appeared not to care.

_Sweet _she thought _it's actually work_- Grimmjow had bypassed the roadblock that was Shiro and begun fighting anew, as Renji this time ducked narrowly avoiding him.

"-ing" she finished out loud, watching them, her hopes of peace yet again crushed. She slumped, head down, with the cat still outstretched as it mewed. She put him down as she went back to the couch, sighing as she leaned back. Meanwhile the fight went on behind her, growing in volume.

She rubbed her stomach as it recommenced its painful sting. _What the hell_ she thought; nothing had worked. If this kept up, she was sure she would pass out again.

_Ha, yah maybe that would teach them…_ at her expense of course. Feeling particularly low she needed a pick me up. So up to her room she went, grabbing a DVD from the shelf and coming back to the war zone.

In a mean streak she had a thought, walking up to the boys, smacking each one in turn with the DVD case. They both turned yelling 'what' in unison, but she just ignored them, narrowing her eyes sharply.

"Keep it down! I'm about to watch a movie." She told them going back to the TV. They stared after her curious then slowly followed much like lost puppies. They sat like last time one on either side of Suzu as she put in the DVD.

The title screen popped up; Repo! The Genetic Opera, one of her favorite movies. It began to play and the boys looked at her strangely, but she just smiled. True it may be a morbid and creepy movie but she liked it and even more so the music. It was fantastic!

Naturally she sang along with the songs as she knew them by heart. She had her favorites, among others Legal Assassin which she sang when it came to it.

'_Where did our daughter go?  
It's me she must escape.  
My burdens I can't erase.  
The mother I might have saved_.

_Marni, I need you now.  
Look what I've become.  
The nightmare that she should fear  
is the father you left alone._'

Part of the appeal of this was that Anthony Stewart Head was the father; she knew him from Buffy and loved his singing voice. The way he sang it, the raw emotion behind it was incredible. She tried copying him as she sang along.

'_The years roll by without you, Marni.  
Seventeen have come and gone.  
I raised our Shiloh with the best intentions.  
But there is something I can't tell her  
I am lost without you here.  
I am only living out a lie_!'

If there were a downside to the movie it was that Suzu got caught up in it and cried along with the characters; her empathy even for it being a movie always acted up and no matter how many times she saw it, she invariably shed a few tears, in particularly at the very end.

By the time it got to that point in the movie, her eyes welled and silently the tears fell even as she sang with the song. She loved it because it was so powerful yet hated it because it hit close to home for her; yet another reason for the tears.

Renji noticed her crying from the corner of his eye and he felt bad, even if it was her idea to watch it. Grimmjow on the other hand had no such sentimentalities, merely irritation scoffing that she would cry over something so ridiculous.

Soon it was over. Suzu sniffled wiping the tears away, then turned to the boys.

"Well?" she said, clearly wanting to know their opinion of it.

"Well what?" said the Shinigami not getting the cue, as usual.

"What did you think of the movie you dolt?"

"Did'ja like it? Huh, huh?" she pestered, like a kid with their parent when they wanted something.

"Uh, well" he hedged, not sure what to tell her. After a bit "yah, it was good." He settled. It wasn't like he hated it, though he definitely wouldn't say it was his favorite. Renji preferred more action-type, even martial arts movies to musicals. But he knew she liked this kind of thing so he fibbed a bit.

"Che, suck up" Grimmjow said from the other side, making Suzu turn her attention to him.

"What did _you_ think?" she asked, figuring he would get a kick out of the violence and gore.

Instead-"I hated it." he said, forcing her to gasp.

"What!" she began. "Why? How could you hate that!" she said "It had everything you could want; violence, language, sexual situations…what's not to like?"

"There was too much damn singing." Again Suzu was appalled but then her face grew serious.

"Does that mean that you don't like it when **I** sing?" she asked.

He merely stared at her like she was a moron and didn't say anything, making the situation worse. Her face fell, like a puppy dog and she looked as if she were about to bawl again. When she slumped back, Renji gave him hell.

"What the hell, you ass!" he yelled "Why didn't you say anything?" he had been all for Suzu unleashing her wrath upon the arrancar but somehow that hadn't turned out the case. Instead she looked like she was gonna cry and it was that damn espada's fault!

"Che, shut your damn mouth Shinigami!" he warned dangerously. But Renji didn't stop.

"You jerk! You're supposed to tell her you like it even if you don't!" Suzu cringed, he wasn't helping.

"Shut UP! I didn't ask your opinion." Now he was up and glaring heatedly. "If you don't shut it, I'll do it for you!"

"Oh yah?" Renji stood and they were off again; Suzu feeling down decided to leave, running passed the boys and out the door.

She slid herself down beside the wall and stared off in the distance. At least out here there was air to breathe, she no longer felt suffocated or queasy. She sighed however.

How much longer would they be like this?

About then the door opened, revealing the boys; they seemed no more worse for wear than usual so that was nice. She stared a bit, they both looked angry yet they stood quietly.

"H-hey" she said not sure what had transpired. "What's-"

"Dumbass here has something he wants to say." The red head spoke, watching the panther whom had his face turned from him. He twitched which meant that the insult hadn't gone unheard.

"Well? Say it. Apologize" Renji said. This time Grimmjow looked at him, a face so hate filled Suzu could almost read the threat therein. It spoke of death for sure.

"Say it ya bastard-""No." it was Suzu who spoke up this time. They both looked at her.

"No, it's okay." She said "You don't have to apologize." Renji looked stunned but she went on.

"It's fine if you didn't like the movie. It doesn't bother me, really." She stood and continued.

"And as for my singing I guess I can see where that could be annoying too" she looked down, like contemplating.

"But that's just a part of who I am. I like it, so I'm sorry that you don't." she told him resolutely.

Then she smiled, once more happy. "Well, I'm going to go for a walk. Anyone care to join me?"

The three of them walked up the block then around, no real place set in mind. Suzu was enjoying the fresh air while the boys avoided each other, one on either side of the girl like normal.

'_But I didn't know I'd love you so much_' she sang to herself, completely fine from the argument they had had. '_But I do_'

Grimmjow behind her listened; in truth he didn't hate it when she sang, quite the opposite. Still, he would never tell _her_ that.

'_We will always have each other in our time of need. Daddy you're the world to me.'_

About then she saw someone she recognized. Calling out to her "Hey, Taki!" she ran over to the girl, excited.

"Hey guys" Taki said, then immediately tried back tracking but it was too late; Suzu caught the plural.

"Guys?" she asked. She motioned to the men behind her "Can you see them?"

"What? What guys, I mean; I don't see anybody-okay, yes." She said finally. "I can see them."

Suzu appeared a little shocked but let the girl go on. "Actually I could see them since I first came by your house. You were talking to the red head" she motioned to Renji.

Suzu tried to comprehend. "So back then you knew I was-""Yes."

"And when I told you about the roommates, you knew-""Yup, total lie! I knew" she said and then gave her that look again, the disapproving one but then she smiled.

"Sorry?" she said unsure, but Suzu just laughed. They hugged happily while the boys had no clue what was going on.

"What's up with the love fest? Don't I get a hug?" Kizoku was behind them, smirking in mischievous delight. Suzu and Taki both said hey but then Kizoku stopped; she apparently could see the boys as well and it would seem had it out for the panther. She glared at him and he right back at her.

Renji seeing this smirked; so he wasn't the only one eh?

Before things could get any more heated another face joined the mix. "Huh? What's everyone doing here?"

"Ichigo!" Suzu and Renji both greeted the boy, but Taki and Kizoku had never been acquainted.

"Who is that?" Kizoku questioned, giving Suzu a nudge on the arm; she seemed interested.

"Oh, that's Ichigo. He's a Shinigami like Renji only a substitute. He's a friend." She said.

"I see" she said slowly before she waltzed over to the strawberry boy, getting right in his face. Ichigo didn't know what was going on, but he backed up a little freaked out.

_Why is she so close?_

After some staring "You're cute."

"HAH?" Ichigo clearly had no idea what to make of her statement. She advanced while he backed up, however shortly…

"**ICHIGO!**" a strong burst of spiritual pressure and suddenly Grimmjow was in front of him.

"OH Crap!"

Grimmjow smiled wicked and was in pursuit but Kizoku blocked him. "What do you think you're doing Smurf? Back off, he's mine."

The panther growled "Che, as if. Get outta my way, butch." He shot back.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa wait." Suzu tried to intervene though it wasn't clear who she was more worried about. "Hang on a second"

"Butch?" she said. "Well alright, I guess. I mean I **am** manlier than **you**." She told him.

Meanwhile Ichigo stayed in the background; he wasn't sure who scared him more, Grimmjow or the girl. Nevertheless he knew when to escape. He turned to slink off but they grabbed him, one by the arm the other his shirt.

"Where do you think you're going?" they both asked in unison then glared at each other.

"Uh, Grimmjow wait" Suzu tried again, figuring she could contend with the espada better than the girl. She went to grab his arm but he shoved her away, clearly not in the mood to be stopped.

Suzu was stunned by his display but quickly anger took hold. She narrowed her eyes darkly then turned and walked off.

"I'm going back home." She said to no one in particular.

Renji stared after her then watched the commotion as Ichigo struggled with two insane people. Taki looked like she was trying to help him, but it didn't seem to be working well.

In the end Renji left as well, hurrying to catch up to Suzu; as fun as it would have been to stay and watch he knew where he was needed most right then.


	14. Choices

Okay next chapter, up a bit earlier than they have been i believe. This chapter was relatively easy to write, it just was harder to concentrate on sadly. i think after this chapter i may break from r v b for a bit in order to get all these other ideas and naughty stories from my head...seriously its so cluttered. hah

also i need to figure out what to do in future chapters, i have in mind what i need for chapter 15 but after that i am finding that i have ideas, just not bigger ones as i have had in the past. so that means i need to form more material around those ideas. i have maybe one other chapter, possibly two that i have worked out but those are later on.

hopefully all will work out and i will have more ideas and be able to plan further, because i still want to work on this for sure!

i do not own these boys like Tite nor the songs or movie The Nightmare before Christmas as i used in this. Enjoy!

1/28/10

Suzu made it back home in record time; boy was she pissed off!

_Stupid Grimmjow _she cursed him mentally, slamming the front door hard behind her. Her hands were clenched tightly in hard fists. "I hope his ears burn off!" she shouted. She glared at everything in her near vicinity, taking out her frustrations on her hapless possessions.

The animals who had been so happy to see her stayed away, not sure what to make of her angry aura.

"Stupid jackass! I was trying to help!" she fussed, though it didn't make her feel any better. She stalked over to the sofa, shooting daggers at it though not for it.

Suddenly she changed, her hard exterior softened and the hate filled aura dispersed. She flopped face down on the couch, lying lengthwise, her head buried in the cushion. Turning her head slightly so she could breathe, her eyes sagged in sadness.

It was as if she had been deflated, all her heated energy sapped.

She felt bad.

All she had wanted was for him to stop fighting and yet he had reacted so negatively. He shoved her away, angry. It was like she didn't matter; nothing mattered to him but fighting.

"I was only trying to help…" she repeated meekly.

Instead here she was, feeling down on herself. Ichigo was probably having a hard time and she felt bad about that too.

She sat up slowly, rubbing at her eyes and turned on the TV flipping until she found the Disney channel. Lo and behold a movie was playing, one of her favorites The Nightmare before Christmas; maybe it would help…

Renji had caught up finally making it back. He went inside and found Suzu easily, sitting by herself on the sofa. He went over to her, noting the difference in her personality. She didn't appear to notice him at first but then he sat beside her and she acknowledged him.

"Oh, Renji. Sorry I kinda rushed back here…didn't feel like staying y'know?"

If he hadn't already become aware of the change in her, he would have by her subdued speech. It was somber, like she was lacking vigor, no longer animated from before.

"Yeah" he replied in understanding. He knew why she would be upset by the panther; still that didn't mean he had to like it.

Regardless he didn't say anymore and they sat and watched the movie, something he had never seen before; admittedly he hadn't seen many of their human world entertainments, movies and TV likewise.

He felt better however when after a short time she started singing the songs played therein, something that told him she would be fine given time.

For Suzu she was enjoying the movie and the pleasant feeling of not being alone as she figured she would have wanted to be.

'_Oh, somewhere deep inside of these bones  
an emptiness began to grow.  
There's something out there, far from my home  
a longing that I've never known._

_I'm the master of fright and a demon of light  
and I'll scare you right out of your pants.  
To a guy in Kentucky, I'm Mister Unlucky  
and I'm known throughout England and France.'_

Suzu smiled to herself, for the next part always made her laugh.

'_And since I am dead, I can take off my head  
to recite Shakespearean quotations.  
No animal nor man can scream like I can  
with the fury of my recitations.'_

She loved Tim Burton for she thought he was very creative and Danny Elfman was a great songwriter and singer. Still she felt bad for Jack, even knowing it would all be alright in the end.

'_Oh, there's an empty place in my bones  
that calls out for something unknown.  
The fame and praise come year after year  
does nothing for these empty tears.'_

For as long as she had loved this movie she always kind of hoped to be able to find someone the way that Jack and Sally found one another.

Of course she realized that even for them it took a bit, the length of a whole movie!

_If only it were that easy_ she mused. She continued watching the movie, all the while unaware that a certain someone watched her periodically…

Nevertheless the show went on and eventually her most favored song began, wherein Sally laments her love for Jack who is mucking up Christmas.

'_I sense there's something in the wind  
that feels like tragedy's at hand.  
And though I'd like to stand by him  
can't shake this feeling that I have.  
The worst is just around the bend._

_And does he notice my feelings for him?  
And will he see how much he means to me?  
I think it's not to be.'_

To this Renji's gut clenched, understanding and feeling what this Sally girl was talking about. Would he ever get his chance?

'_What will become of my dear friend?  
Where will his actions lead us then?  
Although I'd like to join the crowd  
in their enthusiastic cloud  
Try as I may, it doesn't last._

_And will we ever end up together?  
No, I think not, it's never to become  
for I am not the one.'_

Suzu could identify with this as well, though try as she may denying it, she still felt this way. Yet what more was she to do?

Then the final scene came, playing out one of the most romantic outlooks she could think of.

'_My dearest friend, if you don't mind  
I'd like to join you by your side.  
Where we can gaze into the stars_

_And sit together, now and forever.  
For it is plain as anyone can see  
we're simply meant to be.'_

Suzu's heart swelled with the happy reunion and Renji's likewise, though Suzu did not notice. She sighed contented and laid her head back, brushing it passed his shihakusho.

He watched her, his gut tightened. Her eyes had closed like she was going to sleep. She was so close to him, practically leaning on him.

They were alone.

He swallowed, realizing this was probably the best chance if not the only chance he would have. Do it now or forever regret it; sadly he knew what that felt like.

Renji steeled his nerves and decided to go for it.

"Suzu I like you." He told her honestly as seconds later her eyes flew open and she sat up, staring at him.

"W-what?" surely she heard him wrong she thought. "Say-that again?"

Renji's heart thudded, but he couldn't stop now. "Before, when you said you liked me, well I did too but after finding out about Grimmjow" he said his name unkindly, like he still lived it.

"I just didn't know what to do." After all at that time it had still been unclear to him how exactly he had felt and he had been ordered to go back to soul society. However not long after he had gotten back it became clear; he had been upset and jealous and angry at the arrancar because…

"No" she said, breaking his reverie. He stared at her but his heart kept its pace. "Suzu…"

"No, not now." She said a tinge of disparity. "Not now"

He had feared this, perhaps he was too late already; but he still had to try. He reached for her hand but she pulled away, standing. The heat building in him intensified.

"You do like me, right?" he asked hopeful; please say he hadn't lost, not again.

She hedged looking down, hands clasped by her stomach. "I do, I mean I did-"she stopped herself.

"It's just why now? Why not before when it was simple, instead now…and Grimmjow…"

Really he had the **worst** timing. Renji still sat not quite sure if that was a yes or a no. He tried again.

"So you do-""Yes! And that's the problem!" she screamed, unleashing her frustration and then quickly resumed staring at the floor.

"I do but I shouldn't. It's not right—for me to still like you. I can't" he was about to interject but she went on.

"And anyway what about Rukia?" she asked him, eyeing him as he stiffened a bit. "You like her, right?"

Now it was his turn to be cautious. "Yeah, I do." He said honestly "however I also know she isn't in love with me."

"Huh?" Suzu stared confused. "But you-""Yes I did like Rukia, for the longest time I wanted nothing more than to be with her, but I realize she doesn't have those feelings for me. She cares for another."

He had wanted to be with Rukia and he had fought to attain that but he knew now he wasn't the one she wanted. It was Ichigo. In fact if he were honest with himself he had given up his right to be with her when he asked the boy to rescue her; he wasn't strong enough and Ichigo was.

Sure it had hurt him and his pride but he had accepted it. After all her happiness was all that mattered; and she _was_ happy.

"So you just gave up?" she said suddenly. "All that affection and yet you just pushed it aside? How could you-""Suzu I didn't-"

"So what then; you'll be with me even though I'm with Grimmjow? Isn't that the same thing?" it made no sense.

Renji grew serious, his brows furrowed. It was sort of similar he guessed; going from one person out of his reach to yet another. But in his mind she wasn't. It was true that they had slept together but that arrancar was just using her. He knew it.

He stood, firm and resolute, grabbing her tightly. "He's not right for you. He's only using you."

"Renji" she was beginning to waver and he could sense this. "Please just tell me you don't like me anymore and I'll stop." He was so close.

He was right, she realized. She did still like him, maybe more than that but still; it just wasn't right.

She broke down with this knowledge, crying softly before him. Renji eased up, clearly unhappy but he let her go. She sat on the couch once more, unable to stop her tears. Renji sat down also, all his hyped ego gone. He watched her cry, an unknown pain egged him.

He leaned forward and embraced her in a firm but gentle hug. He couldn't stand the sight of her crying. She stilled but then relaxed.

"I'm sorry." He said "I shouldn't have said anything." If he had known it would hurt her this much, he would have kept it to himself forever. She didn't say anything partly because she couldn't. She stayed in his arms relishing the feel until he let go to sit back.

Her eyes still leaked with tears but there was something else in her gaze. "Renji" she spoke softly.

He didn't know what possessed him but without thought he leaned in and kissed her.

Suzu was surprised and yet there was no denying that she liked it. This was what she had wanted for so long. He released her after a couple moments, ashamed in himself for being so reckless but before he could apologize her mouth was on his as they shared yet another startling kiss.

She had been so happy when he kissed her and when he pulled away the only thought was that it wasn't enough. She knew it was wrong to be doing this and part of her did regret that but the larger part of her couldn't care less; He was the one that she had wanted and now that there was a possibility of that she would seize it with both hands.

One kiss led to another and then another as their lips molded and intertwined. Before long Suzu's shirt came off, landing by the couch as they broke for air. She was a bit nervous by this, after all her bra had caused problems in the past. Still, she trusted the Shinigami and of her own accord her bra came off as well, piling up with her shirt.

He stared, his face rosy while Suzu averted her gaze; he really wasn't helping…

He snapped out of it, realizing his staring was unnerving and leaned back in to kiss her, while his hands rested on her ribcage. They crept up slowly, but never seemed to get to their destination. Suzu felt this and was a bit confused. It was like he was afraid to touch her.

She fixed that by grabbing a hand and placing it on her small bosom, making Renji jolt. He stopped kissing to see what happened but noted her pleasured expression. His face heated up but he kept it where it was and continued his kissing much to his enjoyment and hers. He found her neck, nipping and kissing it then licking her collarbone. She grabbed his head and pulled him back in for a kiss, surprising him with her passion.

They broke for air and Suzu took note he was far more dressed than she, quite unfairly. She advanced on the Shinigami, stripping him of his haori, it landing on the floor when she stopped to stare at his bared flesh. He was quite muscular and attractive and there were so many tattoos! She was in awe, tentatively mapping them out with her fingers, her hand gliding along the dark lines appreciatively.

This was the first time in fact that she had seen him shirtless; unlike a certain espada who always wore his jacket open, Renji had always been covered.

"So cool" she said out loud still tracing them delicately; she wondered if there more besides the ones on his forehead and neck and he seemed to get this. He leaned down "There's more on my back" he whispered, her grin now a full out smile. Deciding it would be even better to outline them with her tongue, she flicked it over him following the lines. Mischievously she got off the beaten path to tease a nipple, licking it lightly then biting gently making Renji tense up.

She was driving him crazy!

She came back up to his face seeing the damage done and smiled. She cupped his face with her hand and then grabbed his bandana removing it while she kissed him sweetly. She wanted all of his tattoos to show. With their lips connected he pushed them down, Suzu on her back with him atop her.

He was still fighting with himself trying to control the strong urges that coursed through him. He lifted up to stare down upon her face, flushed with her own emotions.

"Renji please" she begged him; she knew what she wanted and it had everything to do with the Shinigami.

He appeared hesitant though he knew what she wanted. Still he was able to ease off her pants and throw them aside, before halting altogether, staring at her panties. He gulped visibly stricken; truth be told this was farther than anything he had done before and he was admittedly nervous.

"Renji?" he had stopped and looked pale to her eyes. She sat up on her forearms and then placed a warm hand on his cheek. He looked up at the touch and met her gaze; it was gentle and filled with trust and compassion. She smiled and his resolve hardened.

Taking his time, her panties came down inch by inch, revealing more and more of her to him, until they slipped passed her toes, leaving her completely bared. Though still tense the sight of her fueled his need and enabled him to remove the rest of his shihakusho, coming back to lie between her spread legs as she awaited him.

He paused above her still not ready though a part of his anatomy was raring to go, twitching in need. _Okay, I can do this_ he thought _I can do this_. He repeated that mantra over and over again and still he hadn't moved.

She watched him and his concentrated face; he had yet to move and yet she could feel him at her heated entrance. A thought came as she voiced it to the immobile soul reaper.

"Renji, have you done this before?" immediately his face flew to hers, a blush staining his cheeks. She had her answer.

Stifling her automatic response of 'Aw' she instead smiled softly. "Renji" she began harmoniously.

"It's alright." Her hand went to his face once more continuing "You shouldn't be ashamed."

Admittedly she didn't have much more expertise in this area but nevertheless she reassured him.

"Don't worry. I can teach you." She grinned naughtily as his eyes softened amused. He placed one of his hands atop hers on his cheek, squeezing it then dropped it, placing his hands on either side of her.

"I'll hold you to that." He returned and Suzu laughed.

Valor renewed he aligned his hips and looking into her beautiful warm eyes, pushed himself forward entering her. She moaned happily as he sucked in a lungful of air. He closed his eyes, suddenly transported to another plane of existence. This felt unlike anything he had ever experienced. She was so warm and inviting and rearing back he pushed back inwards, rewarded with another tingle of pleasure and gasp from below him.

If this was what sex was like he could easily get used to this.

Slowly he crept back in and out; trying to savor every moment of bliss he was awarded. Opening his eyes he looked beneath him, mesmerized by the exquisite face she was making. Lowering himself down to lie on her fully, he grasped her face in his hands, loving the way she looked up to him.

"Renji" she panted. He captured her lips and they kissed passionate while he moved steadily, never wavering in his pace. Eventually they broke apart and he worked his way down to her chest kissing the upper portion of her breasts, hearing her breathless gasps.

When he figured he had the hang of it he picked up his pace, turning her gasps into moans and groans. She called out to him and it was music to his ears. She grabbed his shoulders clutching his back, scraping him with her dull nails, egging him faster.

Before long he was winded and a searing warmth spread low through his body. He didn't figure he had much more, so making the best of his last moments he thrust deeper, making her sound his name emphatic as he too released, quite tired but definitely in high spirits. He lay on top of her a while, his breath fanning her neck and shoulder until he could lift himself up.

She made a half way smile, her eyes nearly lidded. "Renji" she sounded so happy.

Suddenly a thought came as he told her "Hang on, I'll be right back." seeming urgent.

"Renji what-"he smiled down at her "Don't worry, you won't know I'm gone."

There was a rush of air as he disappeared then just as quickly reappeared with a blanket, covering them both as he lay back down with her. She seemed confused but a moment then smiled.

She didn't know how he was still able to use shunpo figuring he would be too tired, but nonetheless she thanked him closing her tired eyes, the smile never leaving her face. He buried his head into her shoulder and within seconds he was out too.

Not long after he had fallen asleep Renji heard the front door slam and a murderous reiatsu exploded close by. He woke just in time to dodge a strike aimed at his head, as he landed in front of the couch staring at an enraged espada.

"WHAT THE FUCK!?" he screamed. His aura absolutely seethed violence.

Renji could only stare, still naked from their tryst but on guard for the next attack.

Grimmjow's homicidal glare fixed him before landing on the still slumbering girl, the blanket somewhat askew from the Shinigami's quick action. He gave her a once over, narrowing his deadly eyes then back to the soul reaper, his fists glowing with a cero.

"YOU'RE DEAD!" he raged, running forward fist cocked forcing the red head to fight or die. He somehow managed to avoid the fist but could not avoid his leg as he struck out, painfully hitting and cracking ribs, sending the Shinigami flying backwards. He hit the wall, nearly cracking it with the force. He hadn't the time to recover as Grimmjow was back in his face, launching blow after blow.

The Sexta had already been in a pissed off mood, not getting his chance to fight the Kurosaki kid like he had wanted; that bitch with the attitude had gotten in his way. Now come back to find them, **him** with the girl, **His** girl; there was no way this would end in anything but death.

He was getting a few good punches in but not nearly enough, the Shinigami was able to defend himself pretty well given the circumstances; However that was about to change. He had him cornered, trapped against the wall. With no weapons of his own Renji was severely limited in attacks; he sucked at kido and there was no guarantee that he wouldn't blow himself up before actually hitting his target.

The panther closed in, no amusement in his face only malice. He had decided to end this in one blow. Preparing his cero he pointed it at the red head. Renji gulped; all that time in the soul society and after all his battles and training, everything he had been through and this is how it was going to end? He clenched his jaw and faced his foe, deciding if this _was _the end then at least he would show no fear.

Grimmjow saw this and sneered stating "DIE!" before a startled yell pierced the fight.

"STOP IT!" Suzu was awake and flew to the boys, shielding the soul reaper as best she could and standing before the panther. She had wrapped the blanket around her and clutched it tighter meeting the Sexta's eyes.

"What are you doing!?" she began though that was quite obvious. "Are you crazy?"

Grimmjow glared hateful, arm still poised to fire. "Get the fuck outta my way. Now" he was serious.

"No" she responded in kind. "There's no way I will."

He growled annoyed "I said FUCKING MOVE!" he escalated. He had inched closer, his arm shaking from the effort of holding the cero back. Seeing this and hearing the desperation within, her own anger faded and she felt suddenly remorseful. She went to touch him but Renji stilled her.

"Suzu don't" she didn't appear to notice the danger she was in. Still she brushed him off, trying again.

"Grimmjow please" her eyes had softened, showing she was apologetic and she reached a hand out to him. His cero had dispersed but he still refused her, smacking her hand away.

"Fuck you!" he said stabbing her with his words.

She deserved this; after all she had hurt him. So instead of dwelling on his remark she tried to diffuse his anger. "Grimmjow, I'm sorry." She told him in earnest "I know this is bad but please, please don't hurt Renji. It wasn't his doing."

"Suzu, what are you doing?" from behind her. She was trying to take all the blame and he didn't want her getting hurt.

"Like hell!" Grimmjow said "Of course it's his fault! He's been pissed off since he missed his chance and now he's trying to get back at me!" Suzu sighed; he was totally missing the point.

"No, I'm saying it was my idea." She told him as he eyed her for an explanation. She decided to enlighten him.

"I was-well I was mad at you because you just brushed me aside so you could carry on your pointless fight. When I got back I was so **angry** but then I felt bad. Renji and I sat and watched a movie and I felt better but then he up and tells me he likes me!" she kind of gave the Shinigami a backwards look, as he stiffened.

"In truth that was all I had ever wanted to hear but it never came, not when I wanted it to." She had moved forward some more, closer now to Grimmjow as he stared at the girl. "Part of the reason you and I did what we did was because I felt so lonely and was desperate for some kind of acknowledgement that I was wanted. Though I hadn't planned it, I was happy."

"You were there and that was what mattered." There was a swelling of something inside the espada at hearing this and he loved the defeated, shameful look the Shinigami held. She went on.

"Yet at the same time, I still held feelings—for you Renji" she said turning to him. "When you came back all those feelings surfaced. You told me you liked me and I was happy." Now it was Renji's turn to be smug.

Growling the Sexta piped off "So what? What are you gonna do?" she turned, confused.

"Choose" he told her hardened. "What" he wasn't serious?

He continued holding her gaze, clearly waiting for a decision. Suzu held her hand over her heart, feeling it pound unstable.

"I can't" she said, to which Grimmjow glowered. She looked up to him "there's no way, I can't do it!" briefly she glanced to the stunned Shinigami before running off, back upstairs slamming her door to hide away from her troubles.

The next morning a stillness hung in the air. Suzu had come downstairs, retrieving their coupled clothes. She took them to the laundry room, washing and drying them; all the while her attention was elsewhere, buried in her thoughts.

Having cleaned his shihakusho she went to Renji's room and knocked but no one answered. She lay his clothes down on the bed and passing Grimmjow's room she found no one there either. Her heart clenched tight; she hoped wherever they were that they were safe.

Going back downstairs she contemplated food, though nothing sounded good when a knock came at the door. Hoping it was one of the boys she rushed over and opened it saying "Thank goodness! You're alrigh-"she stopped short, however.

Before her were two people she didn't know; both men dressed alike, one with spikey purple-ish hair and three gashes down his eye, the other bald and shiny, scowling with a wooden sword in hand.

She stared for a bit, unsure what to make of them before she uttered "Um, who are you?"


	15. Which is worse

Okay, next chapter. wow hard to believe its only been two months, it seems like much longer. sorry for the delay but since i paused the story it was a lot harder sadly to get back into writing this..i mean i still have ideas i need to do in this but there are soo many more ideas i have (mostly smutty) that have been nagging at me and if you have faved me you know i have submitted quite a few in the past two months.

this story will be at least 20 chapters i bet, maybe more but now i am really wanting to be through with this so i can go into more fics cause ideas for Bleach seem never ending. the updates will probably be slower as well, but i am not gonna abandon this fic; i've done that before and i would hate to do that with this.

anyway here's the next chapter and hopefully this will make people happy and not pissed off( though really you people that read this are pretty awesome) -smile-

3/25/10

"Sooo, who are you?" Suzu stared ahead at the two men before her. She was sure she had never seen them prior to now, so how was it they had come here and for that matter why?

For their part the two guys stared and then blinked a few times before one scratched his head. "This is the right place, isn't it?" the dark haired one asked the other.

"How the hell should I know" the other man appeared more gruff and aggressive, which to his credit seemed to match his appearance.

"Eh?!" the first jolted, clearly shocked. "I thought you said you knew!"

He shrugged "I felt a familiar reiatsu this way; I never said it was his." The cuter of the two seemed deflated and grew limp comically. The bald man looked over her head, searching.

"Plus I felt an arrancar and he's strong too." The other man lifted his head, back to normal. "Yah, I feel it too."

While they talked amongst themselves, Suzu only became more confused. They continued ignoring her till finally she snapped.

"HEY!" she screamed, gaining their attention. "What-are-you-guys-do-ing-here?" she annunciated every syllable, feeling frustrated. She waited for them as they shared a look before the one with hair spoke.

"Is there a guy, like us, who resides here? His name is Renji Abarai-""AH!" she yelled in sudden understanding. They jerked from her loud outburst.

"Yah, of course! Ah, come on in." She smiled suddenly warm and they looked at one another confused before walking in. She went over to the kotatsu before turning around, seeing the two checking out the house, albeit in a nonchalant way.

"Here, you can sit. Uh, would you like anything to eat?" "No, that's fine." a moment or two passed wherein nothing was said, they just stood staring at one another. Awkwardly Suzu scratched the back of her neck, not sure where to begin but then she noticed the familiar garb the two wore; it looked like Renji's outfit.

"So am I correct in assuming you two are soul reapers? You have the same outfit."

"Yes, we are Shinigami." The spiky haired replied and she nodded in understanding. Suddenly a thought came unbidden.

"So why are you here? Wait, he's not in trouble or anything is he? You're not gonna take him back to the soul society…" Suzu was aware that he would have to go back every now and then but she wasn't entirely sure she was ready yet.

"Ah, no-that's not why we're here."

"Well then why-"

"Cause' it sounded interesting." Finally the bald one spoke though it did little to help explain.

"Eh?" she stared at him and he added "I was bored." His companion sweat dropped, seeming embarrassed and Suzu twitched a little before a familiar reiatsu flooded her senses.

"Hey, I think he's back!" she sounded so happy and without another word ran off upstairs, leaving the pair to wonder after her.

Immediately she rushed to his room, swinging the door open but not finding him there. Curious she searched for the strongest pulse of reiatsu, feeling it tug her a different direction. Suzu instead went to her own room, seeing Renji squat on her bed having come from the opened window. He appeared surprised at being caught, quickly removing himself from the bed to stand beside it when Suzu glomped him hurriedly.

The sheer force sent him back a bit but after a time he relaxed more and smiled watching as she released him.

"Renji, you're back! I was worried when I couldn't find either of you, I'm so glad that you're alright!" she cheered but then remembering his injuries from the fight "You—are alright, right?" sounding suddenly concerned. He blinked a couple times at her rapid change in attitude but then smiled reassuringly.

"Yah, no biggie" He said.

They stood in silence for a bit, till finally curiosity got the better of her and she had to ask. "Where _did_ you go?" she asked. She noted that he had his shihakusho on and wondered where he had gotten another one or if he had snatched one before he left.

"Nowhere in particular" he told her, non specific. "I just—I had to leave…" for that she understood and nodded in acceptance. Then remembering her guests "Oh, there are a couple people here to see you"

"Oh?" "Yah, come on" she pulled him with her, gripping his wrist to drag him downstairs where she released him. Seeing the two men who were in the exact same place as before he blinked then "Ah, hey" uncertainly.

"What are you doing here; Hisagi-san, Ikkaku.""Ah well, you see-"

"We were bored" Ikkaku put it bluntly. "Plus Shuuhei's never hardly been here before so he wanted to tag along instead of do his boring old duties…"

"Hey, don't tell them that!" he said, trying to defend himself. Renji laughed and Suzu giggled, finding it cute how he got so defensive and even more when a light blush spread on his face.

After they finished laughing "Hey, where's the arrancar?" asked Ikkaku. To that Renji's eyes narrowed and grew more serious. Suzu saw this and knew that topic was a little sore.

"Um, why don't we all sit down and maybe have something to drink?"

They sat at the table just the four of them and Renji informed them of the situation roughly skimming over parts that he felt needn't be said.

"Hm, so that's the way it is" Ikkaku said; he still held his Zanpakuto as it rested on his lap. Shuuhei sat next to him and Renji sat next to Suzu opposite them. Ikkaku wore a look of annoyance as he growled.

"Damn. I was really looking forward to testing his strength." A silence fell upon them after that but again Suzu piped up.

"So how do you all know each other exactly?" the two newer men stared at her but Renji was the one who answered.

"Ikkaku is the one who taught me how to fight, at least the beginnings after I was transferred to squad eleven. And Hisagi-san I first met on a training excursion in the real world."

"Yah, that's right" he agreed. "You helped me to fend off that hollow at that time; a memorable experience to say the least." He absently touched the marks on his face where the hollow's claws had sliced him.

"So that's how _that_ happened" Suzu seemed to understand and couldn't help but feel a little bad for the guy, even if that was his job. It was a dangerous occupation, dealing with hollows. Shaking her head from the gloom, she tried being optimistic.

"Well at least you both are safe now…so that's good."

Shuuhei stared and blinked shocked at her words but Renji simply smirked; this was Suzu after all, so caring for someone, even someone she didn't know well was no uncommon thing. It was in her nature.

Another abrupt silence descended; Kuroh her kitty had apparently found and taken a liking to the dark haired Shinigami, curled up in his lap purring loudly. She smiled watching his tail flip to and fro. Shiro was missing strangely but Suzu figured he was off asleep somewhere and didn't give that much thought.

Instead "Oh that's right; some drinks" she stood up moving to the kitchen calling behind her "What would everyone like? I've got milk, some tea and there's more I can heat up if you like that, or-"

"Sake" the other man said, making Suzu sputter in mid step.

"EHH??" was her clever reply.

"What? I want some sake" he repeated surely. "What's wrong with that?"

"No-nothing, it's just—I don't have any…""Hah?" he fussed "What did you say?"

Suzu gulped "I-don't have any…"

"Ahhh, why wouldn't you have sake?"

"I don't really want any, I mean I never touch the stuff so-"it was with this, the rough soul reaper stood up, glaring. He headed for the door, walking passed her as she stared after.

"Oi, where are you going Ikkaku?" Renji questioned. "Where do you think?"

"I'm going to get some sake; I'm not gonna stay here if there's no alcohol."

"Umm, okay" she began quizzically. "I guess we're taking a trip to the store."

So it was like this that Suzu found herself in the company of two Shinigami, both of whom she hardly knew, walking the streets of Karakura. They were minus the pineapple headed Renji, who opted for staying home in case 'that damn arrancar showed up' as he had put it. Instead she was left alone, trying to make the best of her more than weird situation.

"As long as we're out, I can show you the town" she tried after several minutes of walking in dead, awkward silence. "There's some pretty different stuff here from where you're from I bet and you haven't been here before, isn't that what you said? Might as well check it out"

She was met with only more silence so Suzu took that as a maybe and kept quiet until they reached the market. She had the more aggressive of the two accompany her in the store, so he could pick out what he liked and then she paying for it, as neither were visible currently, left and Suzu would like to have believed that it got better from there.

However the easy route never did seem to be in her favor.

As they were walking along, Suzu attempting to point out and describe different things they were seeing, the two Shinigami froze mid stride as Suzu crashed into the bald man's back. Confused at their behavior she soon found out the cause and nearly wished she hadn't.

Before them a huge creature stood in place, vile and frightening roaring tremendously, nearly shocking the ground with its volume. Suzu could only stare at the beast, frozen in place with emotions from the past bubbling to the surface.

"Ha, finally some action at last" Ikkaku always up for the fight stood smiling as the beast kept its ground, stating plainly that it was not in the least bit intimidated. However neither was he; gripping his zanpakuto and chuckling in delight, he launched himself at the hollow, his aim true.

"Yahhh" he screamed, slashing with fervor. "Take this!" striking down, he cut the beast in two easily enough and it dispersed to the wind. Landing his feet on solid ground, his face was once more back to its usual norm.

"Tch, that was nothin'. I didn't even break a sweat." He sounded displeased by this fact but Suzu thought he was insane. He should be glad that nothing happened and everyone was safe.

She gulped and began to say that they should head back when suddenly she was knocked aside, this time by Shuuhei as another hollow emerged from seeming nothingness. He blocked its blow and quickly diverted its tentacle like arms before he used shunpo to step behind it.

This one was not as huge but was taller still than a one story house. Quickly he summoned a spell and shouted "Raikoho!" while jumping high into the air. A blast of lightning fired from the sky and completely engulfed the creature, destroying it and a hearty chunk from the surrounding street.

Suzu was stunned and could only stare after the soul reaper as he rejoined them.

"A-are there any more?" she asked hesitantly, her heart pounding.

"No, I don't sense any more" Shuuhei told her and slowly she nodded.

"Good""Hey!" a blur of black appeared before them, as Ichigo suddenly materialized dressed in his soul reaper garb. He had heard the commotion and sensed reiatsu and had come to help.

"Sorry, there aren't any more" Ikkaku replied. "Besides these were pretty weak; hardly worth the effort." obviously still upset that his fight was so short.

"Oh" scratching the back of his head, he looked a bit let down himself. "Well, that's good…"

All in all the occurrences of hollows had been down pretty dramatically as of late and though definitely good it was a tad strange and left an unsettled feeling in the boy.

"What are you two doing here anyways?"

"Visiting" the bald Shinigami responded quickly, forcing the boy to drop his head comically.

"Right" he slung his zanpakuto over his shoulder and then waving "Well, see ya" walking away.

The remaining trio made it all of one block before bumping into someone else that Suzu knew; Taki's cousin Kizoku, sporting a new color and style to her hair. "Yo" she said before stopping to stare at the two men who were accompanying her friend.

"Who are they? More ghosts" she asked. "More or less" was Suzu's response.

"Gotcha" she stood staring and Suzu took note of who she was eyeing more fondly; the dark haired Shuuhei. She almost giggled at the sight, thinking _you too huh?_

_No wait_ she stopped herself mid thought; she did **not **just admit to liking the new Shinigami, how awful. Especially considering the not one but two men whom currently held a place in her heart…_and bed_ she finished shamefully. Shaking her head she berated herself mentally, before seeing Kizoku approach the scarred soul reaper, much the same as she had Ichigo before.

_Wait Ichigo._

"Oh Kizoku" she walked over to the girl and whispered something in her ear and immediately her eyes widened and she was off down the block. "Bye!" she yelled as a dust cloud formed from her departure.

The men viewed this with differing degrees of confusion. "What the hell was up with that?"

"Oh nothing" Suzu smiled then "Come on, let's get back."

Ichigo would have to forgive her later.

Finally the three made it back to Suzu's but an ominous air hung around the place, making Suzu tremble in warning. Steeling her nerves she opened the front door and a burst of spiritual pressure assailed the trio, almost knocking her down with the force.

_Wait I know this spiritual pressure _she thought. Steadying herself she walked in and the other two Shinigami followed, both on alert for whatever or whoever it was though Ikkaku more ecstatic.

Sure enough there was ample reason for the belated warning going off in her head; _I knew it_.

Grimmjow was back and as pissed off as ever. The living room was in shambles, holes in the roof and walls with scorched marks like where a cero had been hotly fired in anger. The air was thick and suffocating and before long Suzu had to grab hold of the upturned couch for support.

This was by far the worst they had ever done in all their fighting and Suzu couldn't help but feel responsible for it.

Abruptly a body flew through the air from upstairs, crashing into more possessions before hitting hard against the wall which thus far had not been destroyed. After the dust cleared, Renji sat rubbing his head from where he had banged it. "Damn…" he wheezed.

"Renji" still weak she attempted to go to him but before she could an agitated growl came from the top of the staircase. Grimmjow stood, eyes narrowed dangerously and teeth gnashed. He quickly disappeared then reappeared downstairs only to block an attack from the anxiously waiting Ikkaku, who seeing his chance decided he couldn't wait any longer.

"So this is the reiatsu I felt earlier. You're the arrancar" Ikkaku was happy; maybe he'd finally get some good fighting. Grimmjow only glared further, not liking being interrupted from his fight with the red head.

"So how 'bout it?" he asked, positively teeming with excited energy. "I'm curious to see how strong you really are."

_Aw crap_ "No!" she tried "Don't-ah" she had moved but a step from the couch and already felt as if she were about to feint; there were too many auras all swirling together and it was too much for her. Fortuitously someone else intervened.

"This is not the appropriate place for this kind of thing, Madarame" as Shuuhei placed a hand on his shoulder to still him. "This is a human residence." He looked over at Suzu, noting how heavy she seemed to be breathing, clutching the side of the couch.

"Please—"before he could finish what he was saying, the panther fed up with waiting slashed again and once more their swords met, fueling the fire.

Suzu watched the two clashing as her eyes steadily became blurry, turning everything hazy. Before long she gave in to her struggle in remaining upright and slumped to the floor.

Sometime later she awoke lying on the righted couch. The two newer Shinigami as well as Renji stood nearby, watching as her eyelids lifted slowly and she turned her head seeing the soul reapers. Focusing her attention on Renji she gauged his reaction as he seemed to be relieved.

"Hey, are you alright" the first words out of his mouth, to which Suzu smiled.

"Yah, no biggie" she parroted. "And you?" His eyes softened a bit; typical Suzu, even though she was banged up she was more concerned about him. After a few minutes she got to thinking.

"Hey, where's" twisting around she spotted him. Grimmjow was on the opposite side from everyone else, hands classically in his pockets and his head turned to the side. His eyes shifted to land on the girl, narrowed eyes then shifted back again. She grinned, knowing full well that quick scan was to see if she was alright, though he would never say it out loud.

"Well enough standing and gawking. Go, eat, drink and be merry! Don't hold back just cause of me…" she fully sat up, though her head throbbed. She placed a hand to her temple.

"You sure you're good?""Yah its fine." She brushed off his worry and stood up, a bit wobbly. She walked into the kitchen, seeing various places that were damaged. Going to the cupboard she fished out some glasses for the sake and went to close the door but it fell, hitting the floor with a thwack. She stared down at it and then shrugged and went to the new boys.

"Uh, here's some glasses for the sake so you can-" she paused seeing the bald Shinigami already chugging one bottle, totally oblivious so she handed one to the dark haired Shinigami. Finding the kotatsu as it lay on its side, she flipped it and placed it back where it was, offering them a seat.

"Here, you can sit and y'know relax." She turned around bumping into Grimmjow who for some reason was standing behind her. He seemed to be eyeing the other Shinigami, a hateful expression shown. She slipped passed him and went to get herself something to drink.

Fortunately the refrigerator appeared to have survived the fight. She took out and opened a can of pop, sipping it with a refreshing sigh. She scanned the rest of the room, seeing the damage. The TV, while not broken thankfully, was black with some sort of debris and would need to be wiped off. Repairs to the ceiling and walls would need to be made and turning to see the stairs, the banister was broken and she was sure a few stairs were messed up as well.

She dreaded seeing what had been destroyed upstairs, the thought alone making her shudder. She sighed hanging her head. About then she heard a belch and then hiccup from the other Shinigami. She chuckled, finding amusement in that and went to check on them.

"I see you guys are having fun." Ikkaku having downed one bottle and then another was working on his third and Shuuhei was beside him, sipping his own from one of the smaller glasses she had given them.

_Well at least they are entertained._ She watched them before thoughts of the animals popped into her head. _I wonder where they are…I hope they're okay after all that._ She was going to go search for them when a hand grabbed her from behind, firmly cupping a breast and giving it a good squeeze.

"AH! What the fuck!" she screamed and cursed, alerting all occupants of her displeasure at having been groped but when she quickly turned she saw Grimmjow. He was behind her yet again and Suzu gave him what for.

"What the hell is your problem?" he had been acting weird but this was just plain rude. She glared at him but he wasn't intimidated. Getting no response she huffed and walked off, passing Renji who watched her then eyed the Sexta. He sneered at the red head as he glared and then "che" and went off on his own.

Later that night Suzu had roamed the house, assessing the damage. She had found the animals and fed them, petting them to reassure them all was alright. The boys have been pretty rambunctious once enough liquor was running through their system but now strangely it was quiet.

A bit disconcerting…Going down the hall, she passed by her room and had to do a double take. Sprawled out on her bed was Shuuhei, quietly asleep and looking oh so cute. She walked in and stared unabashedly. Her room surprisingly had not been devastated by their attacks and luckily was more or less intact. On her nightstand where her laptop was there lay a camera.

However this was no ordinary camera; she had gotten it from Mr. Urahara and supposedly it could take pictures of things not easily seen by others. Deciding to try it out and finding the scene too irresistible, she held it up to her face, taking aim of the passed out soul reaper and clicked. Sure enough there was a picture, just as if he was a normal person. Smiling and after taking a couple more shots (some for Kizoku), she went to go downstairs.

Ikkaku had passed out near the stairway, so she took one of him too and then descended the stairs carefully, still not positive they were sturdy. She heard voices once she reached the bottom but didn't immediately see them until she got closer.

Renji and Grimmjow it seemed had found the alcohol that had been consumed by Ikkaku and taken it upon themselves to dispose of it. now sitting slumped on or close by the couch she could hear them talking; not yelling (well not intentionally) nor bickering but actually having a semi-normal conversation that seemed to revolve around 'the annoying carrot top' as she heard him put.

"He's not even a **real** soul reaper" Renji was saying, a bit slurred. "Everyone thinks he's soo fantastic! HA!" he took another swig and when he put it back his arm fell loosely down.

"He's not so great" replied Grimmjow nearby him. "I could kill him." Even drunk his mind set was still remarkably the same.

"Yah…" it was unclear what that really meant but by then Renji was so slanted over Suzu doubted he was even aware of what they were discussing.

She stayed in the back away from them and just smiled, listening as for once the two actually got along.

The next morning when Suzu came back downstairs, Shuuhei and Ikkaku had left and Renji and Grimmjow were awake but not necessarily alert. She came over to sit by them and the smile from last night was back.

"So you two have fun?" her answer was a moan from the Shinigami, clutching his head and a dirty glare from the espada. She didn't mind, still amused.

"Well you sounded like you were" both heads turned up at this and she laughed.

"What was that" Grimmjow said. "What are you implying woman?"

"Nothing Mr. grumpy; just when I came down here you two seemed to be getting along for once. It was nice is all." Needless to say Grimmjow's mood didn't change; hearing they had gotten along was nearly as bad as having to deal with three soul reapers as he had before. Of course he wasn't happy with them being there and had acted more possessively by grabbing Suzu in front of them. Now they were gone but he was still left with the most annoying one.

"If you two could act like that more often then there wouldn't be a problem." She said.

"Yah, that ain't gonna happen" Renji responded quite emphatic and it was obvious Grimmjow felt the same. Suzu thought about it, voicing her opinion in the open.

"Well I've already pretty much decided there's no way I can pick between you. I've gotten used to having you both around and it wouldn't be the same without you two." The boys eyed her but didn't say anything. Then Suzu thought of something.

"There's no way I can make you do something if you don't want to; I know that by now. However…"

"You may not like cooperating with each other but, I bet you would hate it even more for others to see just how you were last night with one another."

They stared at her though she looked ahead as if this were nothing.

"See I have this camera and well it's a special type that can see what normal people can't." both of their eyes grew wide as she continued.

"It can even record stuff""You didn't-"

She smiled a small but deadly smile, one that shook Renji to his core. Grimmjow however decided he wasn't about to be played by a woman and stood up, heading off to the stairs. If she thought she was going to beat him…

"Oh, it doesn't do any good to go find it; I already have the video on the computer and its already been sent out to a choice few, who when ordered by me will open the file." He froze.

"That can also be put virally and uploaded to the web, free for all to see."

Grimmjow stomped back over and growled, glaring down at her as she sat peaceful. Renji stared in disbelief, confused how she could be so diabolical.

"So which would really be worse?" now she looked at them and her face was sincere.

"I'm not saying you have to be buddies or even like one another; just be civil and y'know, keep the fighting to a minimum." Neither said anything and for a while she wasn't sure her tactic worked.

"Please" she said. "It would really help. And I wouldn't have to feint and get sick all the time."

She looked at both of them, watching their faces. They appeared to be giving it thought or she hoped. Finally Renji relented. "Alright" he said "Fine. But only if he doesn't get out of hand."

Suzu's eyes grew big and she jumped up squealing "YAY! Thanks Renji" she told him hugging him. She turned expectantly to Grimmjow who had yet to say anything. He was glaring, his eyes cold.

"Che" he scoffed "Whatever" and turned his head away and Suzu cheered, throwing her hands in the air. She smiled and giggled happily; true it may have been a dirty tactic but at least now she could be with the two men that made her feel the most happy. What could be wrong with that?


	16. The flu

Whooooooooo, holy crap it's been a while since i updated. But hey! Wait no more! Huzzah! There have been too many good ideas on my mind and not enough me to write it all out fast enough...i still have too many ideas and now i have a few more people i want to write about (damnit) so don't expect me to update this one any time soon.

However there is some goodness in this chapter (hump day anyone?) so i hope you all enjoy that! -smile- it's a double edged sword for that..makes me happy while i write it but sucks it ain't actually happening...sigh, oh well..One of these days! -shakes fist-

Enjoy and be aware there are only four more chapters to this one.

7/16/10

Suzu waved goodbye to Taki and Kizoku, thanking them for their hospitality and made her way back home. She was carrying Kuroh while Shiro walked lazily behind her, sniffing at random smells.

She couldn't believe it had been two weeks since she had been back; two whole weeks since the strange Shinigami appeared and Renji and Grimmjow's epic battle that had threatened to decimate her house. She had decided and her friends had agreed that she should stay with them until the renovations were completed so she had. It had been fun but boy was it great to be able to stay in her own place again.

Offhandedly she gave thought to how the boys made out in their situation but she figured she would find out soon enough, shrugging and walking onward. Shortly she had reached her home, gazing upon it as if it were a piece of art to be cherished. Suzu took a deep breath and then releasing it, grabbed hold of the door handle and opened it. Quickly her mouth swept up in the form of a huge grin as she beheld the beauty that was an undamaged house.

The animals made themselves at home while the girl did a quick inspection of everything, making sure nothing was left out that needed to be fixed. Finding nothing lacking and after a snack, she decided it was best to go retrieve her boys before anything else bad happened.

Closing the door behind her, she stood and breathed in the fresh air content now that everything was beginning to return to normal and headed off when a voice found her. Seeming to come from above her, the girl stopped and turned and found the panther Grimmjow sitting atop her roof, staring down at her.

"Eh, Grimmjow; what are doing on my roof?" she queried confused as to why she hadn't felt his presence before. He let out a signature 'che' and jumped down landing in front of her.

"Nothing else to do" he responded; his eyes meanwhile seemed to scrutinize her person before lighting briefly on her eyes and then turning his head to look off. She smiled at this and giggled softly.

"If you say so… Come on, I was just leaving."

When they arrived at their destined place, Suzu immediately could hear the discord from the second floor; specifically Ichigo Kurosaki's room. Sighing she had to admit she wasn't the least bit surprised. In reality she was more surprised that they have survived being in the same house for two whole weeks without it blowing up. As she stood listening their bickering got louder, becoming easier to make out what was being said—er, yelled.

"You dick! Hey, don't do that; are you even listening to me! Hey!" the sounds got even louder as a scuffle could be heard. "Ow, hey!"

"Ba-ka" she could discern Renji and figured he had done something stupid again…

"Don't just sit on my bed; get off!" "Hah?" "I don't want your filth all over it!"

"What was that?" "You're disgusting!" more fighting could be heard and Suzu cocked an eyebrow. Suddenly the window opened and the yelling flooded out with it.

"Hey, get back here!" yelled Ichigo clearly pissed as Renji was halfway out the open window. He glanced back at the boy. "Like hell I will." "Why you!"

Renji looked down and saw Suzu with Grimmjow, her face in priceless confusion mixed in disgust, not sure **what** the hell was going on up there or _if _she even wanted to know. He smirked and jumped down two stories, landing as silently as a leaf. "Yo!" he greeted quite casual.

She had an eyebrow raised. "Do I wanna know or—"about then the front door swung open and an angry carrot top stomped out. "Renji, you bastard—"he started to say but upon seeing Suzu he faltered.

"Hey" she waved. "I've come to take back the idjits." "Is that right…fine by me, you can have 'em."

He scratched his head looking angry. "Been nothin' but a pain in my ass." "What's that?" Renji spoke up.

Before they could get into it again, Suzu apologized. "Ah yah, I'm sorry about that. I know it couldn't have been easy…" she then bowed low towards Ichigo.

"Thank you very much for taking them in. I appreciate it." the boy blinked then looked away; a blush seemed to form on his face.

"Sure-it's fine." he said. "Nothin' I can't handle." She rose back up. "Good!"

She smiled. "Well we're off. Bye!" she waved and the trio walked off while Ichigo stared after them. Then turning he scratched his head and walked inside.

By the time they reached Suzu's house, she was positively beaming with glee; she was definitely excited to have everyone back under the same roof…that is if certain someone's didn't go about destroying said roof. She stopped in front of the door, then quickly opened it to go inside, however when the boys tried to enter Suzu stood in their way, blocking the entrance. They appeared confused until she elaborated.

"I'm happy we finally get to live together again but don't you dare even think of stepping foot inside this house if you're just going to be destroying it later with your idiotic-male-dominance-ego-driven-battle royale like before." They glanced at one another then back to her.

"First you have to _promise_ me that nothing like that will **ever** happen again" she said, a tone to her voice that meant obvious business. "I'm not thrilled with having to fix my house every time you two have a spat; knock it off!" she warned quite heated.

"If and _when _you have to fight, take it someplace else that won't destroy everything I own."

She eyed them with a look that said _try it and pay_ so reluctantly they agreed. "O-okay."

Immediately she lit up with a smile, the scowl gone from her cheery countenance and she chirped "Good; you are now free to enter." Moving aside the boys shared a look but wandered in, taken aback by how little difference there was from before till now. Virtually all was back in the same state as it had been and Renji and Grimmjow quickly fell back into their same patterns as well.

While one went to root around in the fridge, easily finding something edible, the other stood and glared at every little thing. Okay, so some were happier to be back than others…

Regardless Suzu was happy and that was what counted, flinging herself backward onto the couch to sprawl lazily out.

"Ahh" she sighed very content, her arm dangled over the side. Rapidly her face contorted, nose twitching and she sat bolt upright with an "Ah-choo!" she wiped her nose with her index finger and made a disgusted face. "Damn dust" she muttered and resumed lounging.

Later she was sat watching TV on her brand new television, the previous one having been broken irreparably, when her nose twitched signaling yet another sneeze; this one much heartier than the last. In fact it hurt so much that it made her head begin to ache strangely.

"Ow" she complained. "That's never happened before…"

"What's never happened before" a voice from behind her. She looked up and saw the red head standing there.

"Oh, well I just sneezed and it hurt like hell, but it also kinda made my head hurt…I dunno why."

"That's weird" he came around to sit beside her; abruptly he put his hand to her forehead. "You don't have a fever do ya?" he asked and she blushed at the random contact.

"No-I mean I don't think so…" a growl could be heard as another face appeared. "Grimmjow"

He glared obviously angry at the contact. Renji saw him but didn't lower his hand; he didn't seem to care that he was pissed. "Suzu might be sick again" he said unusually forthcoming towards the panther, though he still pushed his buttons.

"No, I didn't say that" she grabbed his hand and put it down for him. "I only said sneezing made my head hurt." "Well I've never had a sneeze that hurt. Maybe you're just weird." He said.

"Hah ha" said sarcastically, annoyed. "Well whatever" he said and got up. He made to leave.

"Just tell me if it happens again." She nodded. "Yeah" when he left Grimmjow stared a hole in his back then came and slouched beside the girl, though his hands were still in his pockets. She blinked at him. He looked-annoyed, as usual…

She turned her attention back to the TV. They sat for a few minutes, Grimmjow eyeing her from his peripherals. A few more seconds ticked by then "Hey, let's fuck."

Completely absorbed in the television, it was no wonder Suzu's reaction. "What!" she stared at him like it was an odd request. His eyes narrowed.

"What's with that? I only said we should have sex" he replied even though inside there was a jab to his pride for her reaction. It's not like they hadn't done it before…

She righted herself a bit. "Yes, I know what you said. The question I have to offer is why"

"Why the hell not" he retorted. Seriously, what was up with her? He leaned closer to her.

"Come on, I want it." "Well too bad" she said and he started. She looked him in the eye.

"Just cause _you_ wanna do it doesn't mean I want to." It wasn't a light switch you could turn on and off any time he wanted. He wasn't going to give up though.

He moved in more, now leaning heavily over her. "Woman, I'm not going play your games."

"Good" she said "I don't want to play either." She just wanted to watch some TV and get settled but apparently that wasn't an easy task. He growled, getting mad. He grabbed her arm roughly. "Woman"

He nearly knocked her over, pushing her downwards as she squirmed. "Grimmjow, stop it!" his face was close to hers, almost touching. "Please, I just wanna sit and—"he almost kissed her, their lips inches apart…

And then she had to sneeze; luckily she had enough forethought to turn her head slightly and the espada moved quickly once he realized what was going to happen.

As before it set her head into a dull ache; this time however it didn't go away. Instead it throbbed with the dull pain as the girl clutched her forehead. _Ow, ow, ow, ow ,ow_

This time she could clearly feel the heat from her forehead and even worse her stomach began to ache as well. "OW" she moaned and doubled over on her side, with a hand to her stomach.

Grimmjow watched her not entirely convinced she wasn't just faking, however the pain etched into her face was hard to ignore. "Oi woman" he tried to touch her but she only shrank further into a tight ball. The panther loathed asking the Shinigami wretch for help but in this case he didn't know what else to do.

He was on his way to grab him when Renji having heard all the screaming came downstairs a grumpy expression on his face. "What the hell is goin'-"he didn't get to finish that sentence for the arrancar interrupted.

"The girl's in pain" he said even though it hurt to admit it. "I don't know what the hell to do."

"What?" sure enough when he rounded the couch, Suzu was curled in a fetal position, moaning and eyes screwed shut. She was sweating now and having trouble breathing. When she opened her eyes, they were clouded with pain. "It hurts" she panted. "It hurts, it hurts."

Renji rushed to her side in an instant. "Suzu" he touched her forehead and it was burning, a clear indication that something was definitely wrong. "Suzu can you sit up?" she hesitated but nodded and so with the red head's help, they managed her in a seated position. She groaned and slumped forward a bit but Renji had her arm in his grasp so she didn't fall. He glanced to Grimmjow wearing a look on his face showing his concern.

"Come on, we should take you to bed." He said. "Can you stand do you think?"

"I-I don't know" right now the only thing she could concentrate on was her pounding head and how the world seemed to spin. Nevertheless with his aid she made an effort to stand and for a few seconds had succeeded until her legs gave way and Renji had to grab her before she collapsed.

Renji lifted her, bracing her back and under her legs and carried her to her room where he laid her on the bed. She was so heated to his touch that he didn't bother putting her under the covers as it was unnecessary. He looked to Grimmjow who had followed them.

"What do we do now?" "How the fuck should I know" clearly neither of them had a lot of experience with illnesses like this; they were distracted however by the doorbell. Answering it they found Suzu's friend Taki.

"Oh hi; I was wondering if Suzu was here…" both of the boys' faces soured, answering her next question.

"How is she, can I see her?"

They led her to Suzu's room, where she lay panting and sweating feverishly. "Oh Suzu!"

Taki went to her side and held her hand as she opened her eyes. "Taki" she rasped. "What are you-"

"Suzu this is all my fault!" "How is this your fault?" questioned the panther, his expression dark like he was going to kill her for her answer.

"You got this from me…" she explained to them quickly how she had had the flu a few weeks ago. When Suzu came by to explain her situation, Taki had just been finally recovered from her bout with it. Seeing the desperation in Suzu's face, she had jumped at letting her stay until the renovations were completed. Since she hadn't gotten sick or shown any signs of getting sick, Taki thought that she would be fine.

"The reason I came by was because Kizoku has the flu as well…" she now looked ashamed and tears welled her eyes. "Oh Suzu, I'm so sorry. You're both sick because of me-"

Suzu watched her as she openly cried now and let a phantom smile fall on her lips. "It's okay" she said, a little breathless. "You didn't know this was going to happen."

"But I should have been more careful! I should have disinfected everything in my house and-"

"It's fine; don't worry-"wheezing. "I can handle this and I know Kizoku is strong; stronger than me." She smiled.

The tears still falling "How-how can you be so forgiving?" Suzu squeezed her hand, reassuring her.

"I know you didn't mean for it to happen. You aren't that kind of person." Taki was shocked.

"If you _were _then you wouldn't be here now, right?" Taki's face crumpled and began crying anew.

"Suzu" she wailed and hugged her as best she could, not wishing to hurt her friend further. When she pulled away, Suzu still had a smirk before she began to cough, her sickness getting the better of her. Taki had a determined look. She turned to the guys.

"Okay, here's what we have to do."

Renji saw Taki to the door, thanking her for her help. "It's the least I could do" she responded. She looked downwards, still blaming herself for what happened. She recovered after a bit.

"If there's anything else you need, don't hesitate to ask; I'll come over immediately." She bowed and then left, as he shut the door with a sigh. It would be difficult he was sure, but damnit he would make sure Suzu was healthy.

He went back upstairs where Grimmjow remained with Suzu. She was out thanks to whatever pills Taki had given her and there was a wet cloth rested on her forehead. As well, there was a glass of water on the desk. Taki had informed them that it was imperative she was hydrated until the fever could be broken.

Apart from that, she was to rest and not be disturbed unless she woke up to eat or drink, so that meant that they had to leave her alone. He came up to Grimmjow as his eyes glazed over the girl, an emotion other than concern shining in his eyes.

"Hey, we can't mess with her" he paused not sure he was heard. "**You** can't mess with her" he clarified, knowing that the espada would be worse about this than he. "Grimmjow"

"Che, I know dumbass. You don't have to warn me." Still that didn't sound all too convincing.

"Promise me" he said, his eyes stern and foreboding. "Do it"

The panther not in the least intimidated only scoffed. "Yeah yeah" "Grimmjow I swear to Kami if you do anything to her-"

"Fine god damnit, just shut the hell up!" they glared at one another, no love lost between them but finally eased into a truce of sorts.

So for a week they both waited for Suzu to get over the flu and for the other to snap, breaking their promise to not mess with the girl. After the first four days of straight bed rest, her fever did lessen and then vanished altogether. However her aches and pains, dizziness and fatigue did not go away.

After two weeks had passed, Grimmjow decided he couldn't stand it anymore and snuck into the girl's bedroom in the middle of the night. She was passed out of course and he didn't bother shutting the door behind him. She was under the covers this time. He approached slowly, a lupine gaze in his eyes; it didn't matter she was asleep.

It had been too long since he had her, even before she got sick. It had been more than a month since they last slept together and the Sexta was going to fix that real soon.

He stared down at her peacefully unaware face for a moment then began to pull the sheet down revealing her slim body. Though clothed, he still found himself on alert and he had yet to even touch her. The sheet off, he rolled her from her side to lay flat on her back. Conveniently she wore a button down shirt, most likely it was easier to manage with something more thinly designed when her body heat had been fluctuating. Now however the flimsy material made it that much easy to remove. Not to mention arousing as he carefully undid each button one by one.

He was throbbing and she wasn't even naked.

Leaving the bra for now he went lower and undid her shorts to slide them off her and tossed them aside. Now practically bared, he took off his jacket and climbed on top of the girl, straddling her when her eyes fluttered. He watched completely still above her as Suzu opened her eyes. She squinted up at him in the dark, not quite sure who it was or what was happening for that matter. She had been sleeping a lot after all.

Finally "Grimmjow-"she questioned her voice very light and sleepy in tone. She wiped her arm across her face. "What-time is it?" She blinked disoriented at him and he stared at her. The look in his eyes was primal and the sexual overtone was obvious. About then she looked down her own person, noting the open shirt and lack of bottoms; the chill from the house brushed over her stomach, chest and arms and she shivered. She looked back at Grimmjow.

"Were you about to…mess around while I was asleep?" kind of obvious and yet she had to ask.

He didn't say anything for whatever reason, be it lust or shame though she figured it was more the former, his eyes clearly conveying what he wanted in that instant and it was **not **to answer her stupid question.

If she had disapproved she easily relented, lifting herself as best she could to kiss his stomach as he jerked then looked him in the eyes. That was all he needed and he was on her in a flash, pushing her down to lave her own stomach and back to her chest. He kneaded her breasts through the fabric before unhooking it from the back, lifting it enough he could mouth them, biting and sucking. She arched and twined her fingers in his spiky hair, a breathy moan escaped her.

She wasn't healthy by any means at this point; in fact she still ached and was weakened considerably. But right now the only weakness she had was for him and the only aching she could feel was between her thighs.

Grimmjow was working his way down her lithe body, turning her heated where she had been chilled. He reached her panties and divested them in a heartbeat to work her over with his tongue, needing the taste of her like a cat to milk. Her mewling had him smirking and wickedly he increased the pace till she flooded, giving him what he wanted.

She was still panting when he came back up and thrust inside her, his throbbing need swelled further. He pumped inside her, giving her no time to recoup and she wrapped her legs around him, her nails in his back, her cries filling the room. His animalistic urge fueled her own flame and within minutes she was calling out to him through a haze of ecstasy.

When he finally slaked his desire (and after she had come a couple more times) they lie down together, Grimmjow partly on his side with Suzu snuggled underneath him. She was once more asleep and he was relaxing, one arm around her.

He knew he had broken their taboo about sleeping with her when she wasn't well but he couldn't care less. She didn't seem to mind and had even offered herself, so why should he care. If the Shinigami found out, it would be hell but the espada would just kick his ass so it was all good.

He closed his eyes but an all too familiar and annoying voice cursed his name, bringing him out of his calm. _Speak of the fuckin' devil._

"WHAT THE HELL!" Renji was furious standing in the doorway, glaring daggers at the arrancar. "Grimmjow!"

"You son of bitch! You lied to me!" he thought he heard Grimmjow sigh as he looked up. "And, so?"

"And you're an asshole! You know she's not feeling well-""Yeah and all your damn yapping is hurting my ears." He locked his gaze. "What are _you _gonna do if she wakes up cause of you?" the Shinigami stiffened. "So shut your damn mouth-"he drawled.

"I'm going to sleep-""The hell you are!" Grimmjow would have rolled his eyes but he resisted the urge.

"What is wrong with you that you can't keep it in your pants for two weeks?" "It's been longer than that" he grumbled but the red head ignored him. Probably safer that way…

"You're just jealous cause I got to her first""No, I have more will power than you"

"Che, yeah…your 'will' wants her just like mine did; you're just not man enough to go for it, like I did." Renji balked at this, his fists balled. Grimmjow smirked.

"Admit it. You want her right now-"the read head grit his teeth and glowered before turning and storming off, leaving the panther with his beauty rest and the girl.

The next couple days were awkward as hell for the poor Shinigami for every time he saw Suzu, his face heat up as his mind sunk further in the gutter and each time he ran away leaving the girl mystified at his behavior. She had not woken up for the boys' discussion from the other night and so had no idea why the red head ran from her like the plague. The panther's smirking gave her a hint and she had a good idea it was something filthy…

She was able to get up and move around more but she couldn't overexert herself. If she overdid it then she got dizzy and weak and had to lie down, something she never wished to do again if it were possible.

The second day of her walking around and Renji consequently running from her, she decided to just ask him up front what was going on; if there was something she could do to fix it then all the better reason.

She approached him and at a time when the gloating arrancar wasn't around and asked him. "Renji, what's wrong? Are you afraid of me or something?" he was sitting on the couch in front of the TV and jumped when she came near. He avoided eye contact but replied "N-no, why would you think that?"

She got closer to him, moving towards the couch. "Well, because—every time you see me you turn the complete opposite direction and you don't say anything." A bead of perspiration formed on his temple and slid down his face. She got even further now sitting on the far end of the sofa, away from him.

"Even now, you won't look me in the eye…" she looked hurt and he vaguely glanced her way.

"Did I-do something? Do you not like me anymore?"

"Ah-no…no that's not it" now he turned his head to face her, sitting rather stiffly like it was an effort for him to do that much without fleeing. "Believe me, I do still like you" _too much_ he thought grimly, as another part of him began to stir. _No, this is not the time—not the time._

"Then what's wrong" she had scooted closer and upon reflex he held his arms out like a barrier to keep her at a distance. She frowned at this. "Renji, please…tell me what's wrong."

He jumped up as she leaned in, her small cleavage pushing together and almost stumbled over the arm of the couch. "No, that's fine; I'm good really" not convincing in the least. However as he stood, prepared to make a hasty exit, she finally discovered what the problem was.

Standing as he was, his erection was at half mast and bulged in his hakamas, revealing all to the curious girl. Her face lit in sudden understanding and she said "Oh, is **that **what's been bothering you" Renji was confused until he noticed himself becoming overly friendly and blushed a deep crimson, wishing he had fled when he had the chance. The girl however just smiled and stood.

"I see; but if that was the case then why didn't you just ask?" "No" was his immediate response and once more she was confused. "I can't do that" he said, strong conviction in his words.

"It wouldn't be right—you aren't well" his eyes focused on hers, steady. "I'm not like **him**" making it clear who was intended. She smiled as she inwardly cooed.

"I don't care" he was taken aback. She moved forward. "I know you're not him." She was close she could touch him, placing a gentle hand on the soul reaper. "But still…"

"If you're suffering even in the least because of me and _I _can help, then of course I will."

"I don't want you in pain, Renji" said like it was the obvious choice. He eased a little but was still unconvinced. Her smile warmed, spreading through him.

"Please, will you let me help?" her eyes were hopeful and genuine as were her words. Renji found he could not deny her or his overwhelming need for her. He relaxed and with a sigh relented. "A-alright"

"Great!" she cheered and did a little hop of happiness, glad she could help 'relieve' him of his 'tension'.

Just as easily as he relented he sobered, face serious. "However, if you start feeling sick again and need to rest then we stop, okay?" she giggled at how ridiculous the notion of that was, stopping in the middle of sex, but was still proud of him for even thinking he could if it was for her safety.

"Okay" she began and pulled his shihakusho forcing him down closer to her. "I'll be sure to inform you if that happens" she kissed him and they deepened it then parted. She had a wicked gleam in her eyes.

"That is if you think you _can_ stop." His face went red and he swallowed a lump in his throat but recommenced their kiss, his hands on her shoulders. They pulled away and he supported her back with his hand, proceeding to kiss from her lips to her chin, down her throat. Suzu was limp in his arms.

Stopping he saw her face and grabbed her to him much as he had when she had almost feinted weeks before. He was going to take her to the bedroom but she stopped him. "Where are you going?" he paused unsure.

"Let's just do it here." he glanced at where they were and gave thought to the couch as they had done in the past but she pointed to the side, where the Kotatsu sat, unused and winked at him.

"Why not" and he had to agree, loving how sexy she looked when being naughty. Doing as requested, he lay her down on the small table and ravaged her, stripping her clothing in record time. He took off his top half and was working on the bottoms when she distracted him, licking her way up his tattooed torso. It felt so damn good he had to stop, his hands in her hair and eyes closed. She got about as far as she could from her height, sat on the short table and Renji opened his eyes, looking fondly down at her.

He pushed her back on the table and fondled her breasts with his mouth and tongue while working a finger below. She moaned and groaned quite pleased before he had to stop, too worked up himself to go further thus. Unsheathing himself but not disrobing he was inside her heat, in and out as he had wanted since he found Grimmjow with her.

That bastard had teased him and played him like a drum; finally he was able to get what he wanted without feeling shame for it.

"Renji" she breathed. "Right there" she was in paradise and glad she had convinced him. To think she would have missed out on all _this_!

After a while his rhythm grew faster and faster and more unsteady as he released his pent up frustration. It felt so good to be doing this after so long of waiting. As for Suzu she was excited to see this unrestrained wildness about him. It was different than the first time they had done it and somehow more passionate.

Faster and faster he went until he tensed and with a final thrust came, her name rolling from his lips. She had been not far off and a minute after he seized so did she, moaning her pleasure in his ear. They lay breathless on the table for a while, breathing each other in.

After a minute "We should—probably—move sometime soon." She panted only half hearted and burrowed deeper into the red head, closing her eyes.

"Yeah—you're probably right" he returned, just as aloof not moving in the least. He smiled and put his face to her hair, closing his eyes. He fell asleep just after her, relaxed more than he had been in some time.

He would worry about decency later, when he gave a crap.


	17. Rest in Peace

Yay! I'm not dead! Seriously it's been a while since i published anything...no excuses this time. It's all me. I mean it took about 6 months off and on to finish this ONE chapter...Sigh

Well in any event here it is. And on Aizen-sama's birthday no less! (frightening isn't it?) This chapter is dedicated to my Sandy, who was put down about a year and some months ago...i still miss her. Also dedicated to anyone whose lost a beloved pet.

12/7/10

One week later and the trio were sat in front of the TV immersed in their usual routine which consisted of watching Suzu's favorite program; Glee. She knew the boys didn't particularly enjoy said program and that they only tolerated it on a weekly basis because of her: for a happy Suzu tended to be more forthcoming in making others "happy" as well.

Still, it was a moment she looked forward to all week. The show lived up to its name after all, so the girl sat comfy on the couch between the guys as normal, until about 7 minutes into her show where things started to take a turn for the unexpected.

Kurt's dad had a heart attack and was in a coma, turning Suzu's happy routine into a blast from her past. Soon tears welled in her eyes as she watched Kurt's struggle, much, much too close to home for the poor girl.

She knew what it was like to have a parent die and fought hard against the memories threatening to overtake her.

Each song tugged at her heart just a little bit more. 'Papa Can You Hear Me' damn near killed her. By the time Kurt sang, Suzu was in hysterics drowning, engulfed in tears and thoughts of her beloved mother.

Naturally the boys were disturbed by this rapid emotional rollercoaster known as Suzu and the red head had to try and ease the situation.

"It's okay, Suzu. It's just a T.V. show, ya know?"He awkwardly put a hand on her, between her shoulder blades while she cried steadily more.

"It's—not real?" Renji was utterly confused but then again, Suzu was Suzu, so anything seemed possible.

Grimmjow however was more annoyed than anything, a scowl etched into his face. The last thing he wanted was her crying and over something so stupid.

Neither one fully understood the reason for her tears; that was something that she had kept to herself. Even after all this time, she still didn't know how to tell them what happened and was reluctant to share much of anything from her past. It was far too painful and she didn't want to burden them with her troubles.

At this rate however…

Mercifully the episode came to an end and she could shrug off her depression. When Renji asked her if she was okay, she simply chalked it up to great acting and excellent writing, blaming the show entirely for her outburst.

She exhaled, breathing a sigh of relief and noticed the time; she had yet to feed the animals again and figured both were pretty hungry. Grabbing the food and giving each bowl a fair amount, Suzu called for the furry boys in her household and watched as Kuroh's lithe body appeared as if from thin air; a trait most common as many cat owners could attest. Shiro however did not come; no white blur came bounding down the stairs to greet her with a lick to the hand and a furious wagging from the deadly weapon attached to its butt.

Curious, she waited and viewed the cat as he inhaled his dinner but still there was no dog which begged the question: where was he?

She searched downstairs not finding him but figured maybe he had had a nap attack and was sleeping elsewhere. Still, she wanted to know, so upstairs the girl went. Room to room searched and still she was unable to find him until a vague panting could be heard from underneath the bed.

Finally! Suzu crouched low and found Shiro but what she saw made her freeze in fright. He was on his side, eyes closed and breathing shallowly.

He looked dead, if not for the faint rise and fall of his body.

"Oh my god!" Suzu managed to slide him out from under the bed but needed help in carrying him, yelling for the boys who came up after her.

"We have to take him to the vet, like now!"

Quickly they headed out, dog in tow, and reached an animal hospital managing with the help of a freaking Suzu to be seen by the vet promptly. After doing a thorough examination and taking a sample of blood, the vet concluded the dog's condition.

Suzu was pacing in the waiting area as the vet came out. "What's wrong with him?" she asked, hands clasped in front of her.

"After doing some blood work I can confirm that Shiro has heartworm disease; a rather advanced form I'm afraid…"

Suzu gasped but recovered saying "There's treatment right? I mean this is a pretty common disease so—"The grave look in the vet's eyes however made her heart plunge with despair.

He waited a moment before giving his honest assessment; that being to put the dog down.

"In this instance, though there is medication that can be prescribed, we prefer to destroy the parasite completely and that means destroying its host…I'm sorry."

The girl's eyes were already welled with tears but hearing this was all she could handle; the tears fell rapidly and would not stop. Renji and Grimmjow were behind her but remained unseen by everyone save for Suzu, so attempting to comfort the girl would be unusual.

The vet meanwhile attempted to do just that and tell her what was sure to be the same thing told to other people in her position but Suzu would have none of it. "No" she said firmly.

She looked the confused man right in the eyes, "No!" and rushed back to the exam room where Shiro lay, practically motionless. She was not about to give up; she refused to.

Instead she went to grab him and managed to hold most of the dog in her arms, carrying him back out into the waiting room, passing the confused and un-approving looks of the other pet owners. She was heading for the door as the vet tried to stop her.

"W-wait! You can't do that!" He rushed for the door, attempting to grab her. "Stop!"

Renji was near the door and though unsure what was happening, opened it for her and followed her out, keeping her in his sights. Grimmjow on the other hand acted as a road block, knocking the vet on his butt before he could grab her. The vet sat dumbstruck, only seeing the door swing open then close with the panther's departure.

"What the—hell?"

"Suzu, hey wait up!" Renji called out to her but the girl would not respond; she only kept walking that much faster.

Really she had no destination in mind: she only knew she wanted to get as far away from that place as was possible. Clutching the limp dog that much tighter she continued on, ignoring the pleas for her to stop. Only when Renji caught her and Grimmjow appeared behind her did she halt.

"Suzu, you have to stop." The red head looked her over; tears were streaming profusely down the girl's face and she held what would have been a death grip on Shiro though it was a moot point. The dog, he knew, was already gone.

Suzu would have to realize this too, if she were to move on.

"Suzu", he tried being firm yet gentle."—the dog, he's—gone. You know that right?"

Immediately her face which had been unfocused turned heatedly to meet his eyes, defiantly "He's not!" she shouted pushing him away.

"How could you say that?" She looked down to the lump in her arms and stroked his fur; her hands were trembling.

"He's not…"

"Suzu, please—"

"ENOUGH!" Grimmjow roared, finally fed up. He grabbed Suzu by the arm forcefully, locking her eyes in his own.

"He's dead-Gone-Finished." He stated each word clearly, so there was no mistaking. "Alright! Your precious mutt is never coming back."

Her eyes were huge and misty; there was a hint of fear as well. _It couldn't be…not again…_

He held both arms in his hands. "You know that I'm right. So just stop" he released her and stepped back.

"Let the thing rest in peace."

Suzu glanced down at the dog, Shiro. His eyes were closed and no heartbeat could be felt. He lay in her arms but he was gone.

As much as it pained her to admit it, he was right; they both were.

Now she just needed to let him go.

Reluctantly she nodded and gave him to Renji and the three headed back to where they had first found the two; on a hillside overlooking the most beautiful sunset and sunrise Karakura had to offer.

It was the perfect place.

She remembered that's what they had been doing when she found them; watching the sunset when she saw them. Kuroh was being chased by Shiro whom both had nearly been hit by a car. Suzu had thought at the time that Kuroh had been killed, but now…

They dug a hole and placed a marker over his grave. With a sharpie Suzu scribbled 'Shiro' in big characters. She stood beside his grave for a long time, not saying anything—unable to say anything. Finally they decided it was better to go home.

"Sayonara" she whispered, a fresh set of tears rolling down her cheek.

The walk home was silent, only the sounds of the night around them. Suzu shivered absently as a breeze swept in, her face still wet from crying.

Somberly Suzu opened the door to her home knowing what awaited her was more grief. The whole house was already one giant inescapable memory; her mother occupying every inch of her being. Now there would be not one but two souls trapped inside her mind, both of them taken before their time.

The girl shuffled, not wholly walking in a sort of haze, induced solely by sorrow and melded into the couch. She was tired but knew very well in a situation like this she would be unable to rest. Only hours of exhaustive crying would accomplish that.

Instead she lay like a lump, her legs dangling off the end crookedly. She made for a pitiful sight; one that was hard to ignore.

Renji viewed her with apprehension, not sure what he should say. He approached the arm of the couch where she lay sullen. "Suzu…"

"It's gonna be okay, I mean…" He could see the lines of tears as she cried, though more softly unlike before. Still it bugged the red head as he tried to make light of the situation "Ya know it's not like it's the end of the world—"and failed horribly as she cried that much harder.

"Crap, err what I meant was—you've got us still…"

Slowly she lifted her head so as to look at the Shinigami, sniffling. "I know."

He smiled quickly for he had succeeded. "See, I told you" he knelt beside her and gazed into her eyes, feeling fairly proud. He placed his hand on her damp cheek, stroking while moving in for a ginger kiss.

Feeling awesome he added "Besides, we're not exactly alive either—"and thus he had gone too far; Suzu bawled, throwing her face into the cushion and the pineapple head panicked, waving his arms in front of him while Grimmjow growled coming nearer.

He had stayed on the sidelines thinking the dumbass could fix her and he wouldn't have to hear her cry anymore but of course, it's never that easy.

Now **He** had to get involved.

Glaring at the Shinigami, he stood beside the girl where her legs dangled, gaining her attention. "Oi, onna" staring down at her his hands in his pockets.

He narrowed his eyes "Knock It Off!" he screamed, startling both the girl and Shinigami.

"All you've done all damn day is cry—and I'm sick of it!"

"Grimmjow!" Renji scolded.

"You want the mongrel back" he drawled in sadistic sarcasm. "Well too fucking bad: it ain't happening."

"Stop it! You aren't helping her!"

"He's gone, remember? Deal with it." he said finally and watched the girl's response as she sat up.

Suzu's eyes watered, with her hands in her lap and replied "It's my fault" leaving both boys stunned at her confession. She looked up. "He's gone and it's _my_ fault…"

"I didn't pay enough attention to him, I didn't take care of him—and now he's gone" she cried.

They stared at her but let her say what she needed.

"I know he's gone—and I know—he can't come back, but…" she wrapped her arms about her legs.

"I just—wish… he knew how much I loved him!" she whimpered and buried her face into her knees; images of Shiro as well as her mother flashed before her. The same could be said for her and how much Suzu wished she could see her again and tell her how sorry she was for what happened.

The Sexta had sobered; instead of the girl taking offence and being angry at what he had said, she was the opposite and quite remorseful for no reason. Now he felt like a giant ass and that was ten times worse than having to listen to her cry.

"Damn it" he cursed and reluctantly placed a hand on her head in a comforting gesture. He was looking elsewhere when she lifted her head and quickly as it occurred, it was gone along with the shamed panther. She looked after him then turned to Renji who still stood in front of her.

After a beat "Is there anything I can do for ya?" he asked. She let out a shuddery breath then noticed Kuroh, her remaining pet was beside the couch, staring up at her. He mewed, then jumped up on the couch with her and snuggled right into her lap, triggering yet another round of crying for Suzu.

"Oh Kuroh!" she sobbed and held the kitty to her chest. It was at times like these she knew them to be more than just animals.

She released him after a time and looked to Renji who knew what was needed of him at that moment, taking Suzu into his arms while she wept.

Several days of this passed in this manner, Suzu crying and the boys doing what they could to comfort her.

Save for the fourth consecutive day after Shiro's death. Practically tapped out of tears, Suzu lay on the couch with Renji watching one of her movies. It was a favorite and an attempt to distract the girl from less than pleasant thoughts. It was obvious the pain was still there but now it was more internal, like a dull ache in her heart.

The girl was nearly passed out, having not slept well for the last few days and had her head on the red head's lap. Closer and closer she crept into the oblivion of dreams when there was a lick and wetness suddenly at her bawled fist under her chin.

Still attempting sleep she ignored it only to have the same thing occur only this time higher, on her face.

"Mmm, quit" she mumbled, nearly asleep till 'Arf' and immediately her eyes flew open and a scream ensued. "OH MY GOD; SHIRO!"

She flipped up and shrieked in delight as Shiro jumped on her, licking her with fervor. They happily played for a while, Renji smirking behind them.

"You're back! Well…kinda." Before the girl was her dog, only a little—different than before.

And a little more see thru.

He had come back after four days but he was ghost…which was perfectly fine with her.

She giggled, "Maybe I should change your name to Zero, eh?"

Now she could never lose him again.


	18. Parting with friends is a sadness

Sorry guys. It's been over a year since I last updated. Dear god! These past two weeks-I don't even know...My birthday was about a week and a half ago, but three days before that, my friend Will died. He was my oldest friend, known him since 4th grade I think and it was a shock to everyone. Even now, we aren't sure how he died. It still doesn't seem real. That whole week was-impossible. That, on another friend's birthday, then that week's Bleach chapter was like horrible cosmic timing(not spoilering for those who haven't read it), then my birthday, then that Douche-bag at the Batman movie in Colorado...life is scary sometimes.

I'm sorry it took me this long and it's terrible that it took _this_ to make me update, but I felt I had to do something. I also apologize that the past two chapters have been about death but, that's life too I suppose. And who would know better than Shinigami.

This goes to anybody who's known loss in their time on earth and for all those people in Colorado, and for you Will. I miss you.

Do not own Bleach or any of its' characters. The title of the chapter is a quote from Dune.

07/18/12

A few months passed and no major incidents occurred, either natural or spiritual. A few minor hollow were spotted but were easily dealt with and all was well with the world. Renji did make a couple trips to Soul Society, conferring with the captains the more than unusual lack of hollows in the human world. Things were ordinary, no better or worse than before.

Then just as always, tragedy struck.

Renji came downstairs and saw Suzu. She was standing seemingly lost in thought as he called out to her, "Yo, Suzu!"

She didn't look up and didn't seem to hear or even acknowledge the Shinigami; confused, he drew closer and reached a hand to touch her. "Suzu, hey-"then he saw the tears silently streaming down her face.

"Hey, hey, hey; Suzu" lifting her face higher in his hand, "What's wrong?" She still wouldn't look at him, her eyes shut tightly. Trying to lighten the mood, he quipped "Don't tell me the cat died too" hoping for a chuckle, or a smile at least. She only cried and chocked out, "He's dead."

"Who; what do you mean?" He knew full well Grimmjow was very much 'alive' and seeing the cat pass by his leg, glancing up at Suzu, he was too. Ichigo and the others, as far as he knew, were all well.

In between sobs, he heard the words 'Friend', 'School', and that he was 'someone she grew up with', though she paused in the middle of it, finding it hard to update the _is_ with _was._

Understandably she was upset, telling the red head "I don't even know what happened…we hadn't talked for a while…" Her grief overtook her and she buried her head into his shihakusho, muffling her cries.

Renji patted and attempted to console the girl before the panther showed up. He scoffed at the scene they made.

"The fuck's wrong with her now?" It seemed the girl was always finding new reasons to cry, most of which were lost on him.

"Someone she knew, a friend, died." Renji informed him, earning another jeer from the espada.

"Che— Fucking annoying"

Suzu sniffled, lifting her head. Her watery eyes locked onto the panther as he stared back in turn.

"Things die. So what? Yer gonna cry about all of them?"

Renji glared. "Hey, leave her alone."

"He was my friend… What the hell?" She couldn't understand why he was being so mean. Didn't he understand the loss of something important?

He glared, his eyes piercing. "And— I'm saying it's stupid to fuckin' cry about it. You cry about everything! Cut the shit out already."

Renji interjected with, "Grimmjow, enough!" but the Sexta only continued, making things worse.

"You act like this is the _only _time anything's died; it's not. Everything dies. That's life."

"We're dead" he gestured to Renji and himself, "or did you forget?" She hadn't, but it stung to hear.

"One day, you'll die too-"

Suzu didn't let him finish whatever he was going to say and pushed away from Renji, too upset to bear it any longer. She glared with tears coursing her cheeks and screamed with her fists balled, "You're a fucking ASSHOLE!" and then slammed the door as she stormed out.

By the time Suzu took stock of her surroundings and rubbed her bleary eyes clear, she was in front of Taki's place. She rang the doorbell and upon Kizoku answering, flung herself at her more than confused friend. She simply stood and stroked her back reassuringly, leading her inside.

After a time she was able to tell her friends what had happened. They both comforted Suzu as best as they could; Kiz understood better than most what losing a childhood friend was like and the two were able to bond over their shared loss.

An hour and half later, and they were saying their goodbyes.

"If you ever need anything, just tells us, okay?" Kiz was saying, as Suzu stood outside the door.

"I mean it. If that blue headed ass gives you ANY trouble, you know where to find me." Suzu chuckled a bit at that, but agreed and hugged them both. Her eyes misted suddenly with tears.

"I love you guys…'sniff'—you know that, right?"

Taki and Kiz smiled. "We love you too."

Meanwhile, Renji had been out looking for her with Ichigo's help. Try as he might, her reiatsu fluctuated and was harder to pinpoint. She ran into them as she was walking out of Taki's. Renji was quite relieved and immediately embraced her.

"There you are—I was worried" he told her. "You disappeared."

He stepped back, a smirk on his face. "I had to have this numbskull help me track you down", gesturing as he did behind him at Ichigo who scowled.

"You okay?" Suzu was unusually quiet and that worried the Shinigami more than her crying.

Suzu nodded, "Uh huh—"though tears were already on their way down her face. She glomped Renji and held him firmly. "I'm sorry—'sob'—I didn't mean—to worry you!"

"Suzu…"

Renji had come for her, was worried for her and concerned for her safety. Likewise, she had Taki and Kizoku, both trying to help in her time of need. And even though Grimmjow was currently being an ass, she knew if she were in serious danger, he would come and save her. Ichigo probably would too.

They all were her friends. The only family she had. They cared about her.

And that made her sadder than anything.

She didn't deserve any of them. Not after what she did.

_Mom…_

Suzu detached from Renji's person and the pair thanked Ichigo. Suzu was still leaking and snuffled pathetically as they turned to go, when Ichigo called out. "If it means anything, I know what you're feeling." She paused, watching him take a breath and shove one hand into a pocket.

"My mom died when I was little—it's not easy."

Suzu's eyes widened. "You—lost your mom—?" He nodded.

"I won't tell you I'm over it or that everything's going to be 'fine', 'cause it's not—not really."

"I still wish there was more I could have done, to protect her—"He paused and Suzu knew he still felt it; still lived that day in his head.

"But—you'll get through it." He smiled, softly and maybe a bit forced but she knew he was right.

He lifted his hand in parting and began to stroll away and Suzu said, "Hey—can I talk to you sometime? Ya 'know, about—all this?"

If anyone was going to understand what happened in her past, Suzu figured it'd be Ichigo.

"Yeah, sure"; he walked off and Suzu waved, somewhat comforted that they were more alike than she realized.

Back at home, Suzu had calmed somewhat. She distracted herself with the animals, corporeal and not, lounging on the couch. Occasionally she would let out a heavy saddened sigh, but otherwise was lax. Renji knew it would take time for her to get over this and accept his death; he just wished he could do more to help her. He hated seeing her upset, even for the best of reasons.

What Ichigo told her about his past floated in Renji's head; it was an insight into the boy that truth be told, he knew little of.

Renji saw the look of understanding and familiarity, even, that stole over Suzu's face when he spoke and she seemed to feed off the carrot top's words. Something was there, like an invisible bond of loss between them. Ichigo was able to bring her comfort and though thankful for it, Renji was also slightly jealous and felt jilted a bit. It stung his ego and the Shinigami wished he could relate better to her situation. Then it occurred to him: he had lost people too.

Countless people in Soul Society died on a fairly regular basis, Shinigami included, but the ones that hurt the most were the friends Rukia and he had lost before they entered the academy. Back when they were just struggling to survive.

They had banded together and for ten years, they lived solely for one another; god knows they couldn't trust anybody else in that hellhole. After they died, Rukia had suggested that they become Shinigami and Renji had agreed.

That seemed so far away now. Countless years had passed since then. But he hadn't forgotten them, not truly.

Suzu had turned the TV on but it was mostly background noise; he knew she was miles away, lost in her own thoughts. Renji gently nudged the cat off the couch and sat down, grabbing Suzu's hand to lace his fingers with hers. She smiled faintly and leaned her head on his shoulder.

She sighed again, but this time was more a sigh of contentment. "I'm glad at least one of you isn't being an asshole…" She hadn't seen Grimmjow since their spat and wasn't particularly interested in finding him.

Renji squeezed their intertwined fingers in reassurance before deciding to tell her a bit about his own past.

"Back in Soul Society, way back when I was still a kid, I had these friends—other kids that had nobody. We would always get into so much trouble." Suzu smiled, imagining all the hi-jinks a little Renji could get into. It made for a cute mental picture.

"Mostly, we were just trying to survive for another day-"All the cute and fuzzy's disappeared with that lone sentence.

Suzu's brows furrowed in concern; _where was he going with this?_

"One day, as we were stealing a jug of water, we were almost caught—he was right on our heels and I thought we weren't gonna make it—but that's when we met Rukia." An almost serene expression played out on his features, recalling how they had escaped and how jealous he had been when he learned that Rukia had spiritual energy too.

"We stuck together. We were practically inseparable. And then, one by one, they died." Now it was Suzu's turn to squeeze _his_ hand.

"Rukia and I were the only ones left. We vowed to become Soul Reapers, by their graves, so no more innocent people would die."

He took a moment, letting everything sink in, and then said "I'm sorry your friend died." Suzu exhaled.

"Me too…"

A few days passed by, much in the same manner. His funeral came and went, but Suzu did not go. She couldn't bring herself to go and see him. It hurt too much.

A day after that, Suzu went to the gravesite with Taki and Kiz, saying her goodbye with tears streaking her cheeks.

Two more days passed and Grimmjow reappeared. Neither said a word to each other, but otherwise everything was the same.

Suzu sat on the couch and flipped rather lazily through the channels. Nothing was interesting and she wasn't really paying much attention to it anyway. Instead, she was trying to figure out what the idiots upstairs were arguing about.

She had a good idea it was about her.

Flipping the TV off, she headed up to them figuring their fight would be at least somewhat entertaining. She found them bickering in the hallway, not far from the bathroom.

"Look at this!" Renji was saying; "That's _your_ hair!" Grimmjow was impervious as was natural, no matter the accusations thrown at him.

The Shinigami was upset however. He scowled, "You wanna know how I know that's your hair?"

"It's BLUE!" he raged. "You're the only one who has _blue_ hair! Clean that shit out!"

"Che— I don't know why you're bitchin'; you got longer hair. Hell, even Suzu has shorter hair." Renji glared.

"You wanna complain to someone about the drain gettin' clogged, blame yourself."

"I'm not the one who's CLOGGING IT!" Suzu watched this play out and had to laugh at how ridiculous the whole thing was.

Really, how mundane compared to everything else they had been through. All that they had done and shared, and yet hair was the issue at hand. She smiled but rapidly it was upturned and she was back to crying. It was then the boys stopped quarreling and remembered whose house they lived in.

Renji was always the first to apologize, "Suzu—we didn't mean to upset you."

"You can't die—either of you." She sniveled, her shoulders shaking in effort.

"Never ever; I can't lose you too…" she broke down in full fledged sobbing and Renji soothed her.

"We'd never leave you." He embraced the girl as she cried and cried and cried.

A few more days passed and Suzu was doing better. She wasn't 'over it' by any means, but didn't cry at the drop of a hat either. Still, she would stop from time to time and remember something; something he said or did, something dumb or funny, a song would come on the radio or a commercial on TV. There would always be reminders of him.

This time it was a memory. He had a knack for teasing her or riling her up but then he would stop, arms outstretched, asking for a hug. No matter how mad, Suzu always took him up on that hug.

Suzu was descending the stairs and stopped at the landing, tears in her eyes. That would never happen again. From her peripherals, she saw Grimmjow approaching. Quickly, she wiped her eyes and sniffed, glancing his way, sure she was going to get griped at for crying.

Instead, Grimmjow hugged her. "Cry if you gotta."

Suzu was confused. "I thought you hated me crying—I thought it pissed you off"

"I do and it does but, the sooner you get over this shit, the sooner we can get back to fucking."

Suzu laughed. She hugged him tighter, remembering why she fell in love with him in the first place.

Ichigo had it right; she would get through it, with their help.


End file.
